Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At our private the lifers tend to be more mediocre in terms of academics, athletics or both.

Sounds like jealousy.

Riiight.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At our private the lifers tend to be more mediocre in terms of academics, athletics or both.

Sounds like jealousy.

No, just the truth. It’s a LOT easier to get into our school in K or PreK and gets increasingly more difficult at 6th and 9th.

It is rarely worth the money

Anonymous wrote:At our private the lifers tend to be more mediocre in terms of academics, athletics or both.

Sounds like jealousy.

At our private the lifers tend to be more mediocre in terms of academics, athletics or both.

The work load can be a shock depending on what public your child is coming from. My DC had virtually no homework all of elementary and the hour of homework per night starting middle school was challenging.

Anonymous wrote:I think the biggest difference is the older your child is when they enter private, the less connected you are likely to be to other parents, unless you’re very outgoing. Younger kids require a lot more parent involvement in their social lives (organizing playdates, staying during bday parties etc) which bonds the parents a bit more. Older kids don’t need as much of that. My kid is a lifer and I still feel more connected to the other lifer families b/c of those early days. I wouldn’t necessarily recognize some of the newer parents or kids if I saw them outside of the school setting.

100% this. my child is a lifer at a cathedral school and I don't know many parents of kids who came in 9th unless my kid does sports with them or has a very close friendship. If you are very active in the PA, you will also meet new parents but that's a small subset of people. I still know all the Beauvoir parents, even I'm not close with them--I've been interacting with them for more than a decade!

Anonymous wrote:That’s called the lifer clique.

Meh, clique suggests someone’s being excluding. There simply aren’t as many opportunities for organic connection amongst parents as kids get older.

That’s called the lifer clique.

I think the biggest difference is the older your child is when they enter private, the less connected you are likely to be to other parents, unless you’re very outgoing. Younger kids require a lot more parent involvement in their social lives (organizing playdates, staying during bday parties etc) which bonds the parents a bit more. Older kids don’t need as much of that. My kid is a lifer and I still feel more connected to the other lifer families b/c of those early days. I wouldn’t necessarily recognize some of the newer parents or kids if I saw them outside of the school setting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The “bad kids” trope sounds absolutely ridiculous. My child entered a highly esteemed Big 3 at 6th grade from public school and has ingratiated themselves very well socially and academically. In fact, I believe they’re on par or above some of those who came in earlier grades. My kid entered as a straight A student, tested well and an athlete.

Agree.

It depends on the school. At the more selective schools the new kids are the “smarter kids”. At catholic schools or less selective privates they are the “bad kids”. So, again, not all private schools are created equal. Just like not all public schools are created equal. The generalizations an biases here are astoundingly inaccurate.

The generalizations and biases in your post are astoundingly ignorant and inaccurate.

Ironic, don’t you think?

Anonymous wrote:My DC started in 7th grade, came from public. Worst decision ever from a social standpoint-never integrated well despite doing sports for 3 seasons and being a top student. Tried to get them to go back to public each year. Lifers at the school by a large academically weak, ultra cliquey and exclusionary, and kids and parents generally suck. Graduation can’t come too soon!

I’m sorry OP. This feels so cohort and school dependent. My kid started in 7th and we had a great experience (kid and parents).

The lifers in my estimation are families for whom the money is just no object. And I don’t necessarily mean the parents; often times these families have extended families who are paying for school. My experience is not Catholics.

For other folks, they make more $ over tie, anr then the following happens: they convince themselves public isn’t working — it’s my kid isn’t being “challenged” or my kid “needs more individual attention.” Then, finally, the freak out that they will be boxed out at 9th and want to guarantee an US spot.

The 9th admits around here at non Catholics that are competitive academically tend to be some of the very best students.

My DC started in 7th grade, came from public. Worst decision ever from a social standpoint-never integrated well despite doing sports for 3 seasons and being a top student. Tried to get them to go back to public each year. Lifers at the school by a large academically weak, ultra cliquey and exclusionary, and kids and parents generally suck. Graduation can’t come too soon!

Anonymous wrote:Why would I pay for the privilege of having my child labeled a "bad kid" by some spoiled brats?

Private school is not for you or your family.