Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 11:12     Subject: I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
If I wasn’t at work at that time I would pick my kid up. She’s in 6th and I pick up because she’s in private and there’s no bus. Her stuff is heavy. Lunchbox, backpack( with books in), laptop in laptop case….. it’s a lot.
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 11:11     Subject: I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
Anonymous wrote:I would just drive her if I could. I don’t believe walking a mile to school is a necessary part of education.



Maybe not but we've got an obesity epidemic in this country, a decrease in unstructured/free time and an increase in eroding combination of screens and social media, which also promote being sedentary for prolong periods, all of which have an adverse impact on education and well being(directly or indirectly); so, most kids would benefit from walking a mile home.

So, unless you are getting them to another activity or time is otherwise and issue, they should absolutely be given the benefit of walking.

Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 11:09     Subject: Re:I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
I guess many of you people don't have jobs. Not everyone can pick up their kid when middle school lets out every day. Where I am they get out at 2:30.
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 11:06     Subject: I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
Can you walk with her? What a great time for exercise and a chat.
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 11:02     Subject: I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
Anonymous wrote:Long story short, we live literally across the street from the cutoff for bussing to our middle school. It’s a trek, but doable in the warmer months. Over the winter, especially on dreary days, I made it a habit of picking her up from school. It’s an ordeal and not easy by any means. It involves inevitably getting stuck at a light for a few cycles, waiting in line, etc. She could walk faster. But I digress.

Now that it’s warmer, she’s been walking, but she hates it. She will text me, “Mom! Mom! I’m so hot/I’m so cold/I got my period/I have to poop/etc etc, please pick me up!” I don’t, I don’t even respond, but I’m tired of the texts and then the attitude once she gets home.

Just ignore? Implement a punishment for annoyance and grouchiness? Is it summer yet?


Sitting a few cycles of a light and waiting in kiss and ride is not an "ordeal"? Geez.
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 10:55     Subject: Re:I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We have a similar situation. I try to make it clean in the morning that I will not be picking her up and will see her when she gets home. Then there is no expectation that I might pick her up and no disappointment when I don't. I also try to make it clear when we're going over our week on Sunday what she can expect. (E.g. I will pick you up on Tuesday since you're staying late for a club meeting - the other days you will walk home). Our school has an aftercare program (its a PK-8th) so when she gets to grumbly I offer to sign her up for that and then pick her up at 5:30pm. She stops grumbling pretty quickly at the mention of aftercare.


This seems like a good approach. Is there an option where she can stay at school until later and then you could pick her up? That can be the compromise.

Also, does she have a phone? Could you help her find a book or podcast she might like to listen to while she she walks?


Don't do this. No headphones when walking.
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 10:54     Subject: I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
If this were my tween, I'd bet that the uncertainty would be the culprit behind the grumpiness more than the walk itself.

Come up with a plan together for which days walking and which days driving (if any) and then stick with it for a couple weeks. Then review together what worked and what didn't and adjust as needed.
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 10:46     Subject: Re:I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
Anonymous wrote:We have a similar situation. I try to make it clean in the morning that I will not be picking her up and will see her when she gets home. Then there is no expectation that I might pick her up and no disappointment when I don't. I also try to make it clear when we're going over our week on Sunday what she can expect. (E.g. I will pick you up on Tuesday since you're staying late for a club meeting - the other days you will walk home). Our school has an aftercare program (its a PK-8th) so when she gets to grumbly I offer to sign her up for that and then pick her up at 5:30pm. She stops grumbling pretty quickly at the mention of aftercare.


This seems like a good approach. Is there an option where she can stay at school until later and then you could pick her up? That can be the compromise.

Also, does she have a phone? Could you help her find a book or podcast she might like to listen to while she she walks?
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 10:44     Subject: I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How can you be zoned for the middle school but not zoned for busing?


MCPS has a 1.5 or 2 mile radius for walkers in middle school. We are walkers at about one mile from school.


Oh -- for some reason I thought that she was on the outer bound of the bus radius, not on the inner bound/walk radius.
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 10:42     Subject: Re:I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
We have a similar situation. I try to make it clean in the morning that I will not be picking her up and will see her when she gets home. Then there is no expectation that I might pick her up and no disappointment when I don't. I also try to make it clear when we're going over our week on Sunday what she can expect. (E.g. I will pick you up on Tuesday since you're staying late for a club meeting - the other days you will walk home). Our school has an aftercare program (its a PK-8th) so when she gets to grumbly I offer to sign her up for that and then pick her up at 5:30pm. She stops grumbling pretty quickly at the mention of aftercare.
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 10:37     Subject: I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
Anonymous wrote:Just pick her up. She’s tired and the book bag is heavy.


+1
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 10:35     Subject: I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
Stop being a drama llama. She learned it by watching you. Be glad your child talks to you, and be firm but kind.
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 10:34     Subject: I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
Just pick her up. She’s tired and the book bag is heavy.
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 10:33     Subject: I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
I was going to suggest a bike or scooter. Or have her walk half way so that you miss some of the worst traffic.

Main thing is to decide every day or week what the plan is. "I can pick you up Monday at the halfway point but I can't pick you up Wednesday. You can walk, or you can choose to stay at school and do homework until 4:00 and I can get you then."
Anonymous
Post 04/30/2024 10:26     Subject: Re:I’ve created a monster. Can I nip this in the bud?
Just say no - it's not that hard. If she really has an issue, sometimes, then just do it in those moments.

Also, were you serious about implementing a punishment for annoyance or grouchiness? She's allowed to be grouchy or annoyed - she's not allowed to be verbally abusive to members of the family (at least that's the rule in our house).