We are both permanently remote and we have FT childcare for our kids.

5yo is in full time k and goes to aftercare and our 3yo goes to full time montessori preschool

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You say reliable childcare and then you mean it to have coverage when camp closes. No! I do have reliable childcare, but if my aftercare or camp closes, then by definition I do not. My backup plan is taking annual leave.

My kids are 2,5,8. They don't veg in front of the TV all day anyways. They'd have activities and be playing when I'm working. The oldest likes to read. I absolutely can't work with the 2 year old home though. The others are fine and don't need me nonstop.

This. There's reliable childcare and then there's expecting people to never, ever have a childcare emergency. If someone has a "childcare emergency" multiple times a month, I can understand being critical and saying they need to figure something out. But if you're upset because a few times a year, a working parent needs to either take off last minute or may allow an older child (not a 2 year old, agree that's impossible) to stay home while they work, they you're really just saying you don't think parents should work unless they have a SAHP or a nanny. But even then -- sometimes a SAHP or nanny have their own healthcare emergency. Stuff happens. This is life.

Yeah I would need to be paid a lot more to have my life set up this way (like multiple nannies and someone on-call).

FT daycare, we WFH but our jobs are real jobs.

Younger one in daycare, older in ES + aftercare that also covers a lot of the random days off.

Sick days we have to juggle. Our workplaces are sympathetic about that but would not be ok with someone not having real childcare in general - we get paid enough that it's not an excuse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's backup day care that the employer can pay for if they want their employees to have it. We do have that, with bright horizons, and it's useful. But if my elementary-school aged kid is sick, I'm staying home, and I can either take leave or work. My employer would prefer to have me work.

I've heard of this but neither of us has ever worked for an employer that provided it. I think this is a pretty uncommon benefit.

Plus if my 4 year old is home with a 103 fever, I'd rather take my leave. I could see this benefit being useful for a teacher workday closure or something, but not a snow day or a sick day.

Right - we use it for planned days off to take the kid into bright horizons, not unplanned/sick days.

I don’t understand your question. You seem to be conflating daily childcare (nanny, daycare, or school) with backup/emergency care (days off, summers, or sick days). They are not the same thing.

I was pretty stunned the other day to hear someone say that the advantage of remote work is not having to pay for daycare.

Admittedly, I do not have childcare myself for sick days or teacher workdays, but my kids are 11 and 13.

Anonymous wrote:There's backup day care that the employer can pay for if they want their employees to have it. We do have that, with bright horizons, and it's useful. But if my elementary-school aged kid is sick, I'm staying home, and I can either take leave or work. My employer would prefer to have me work.

I've heard of this but neither of us has ever worked for an employer that provided it. I think this is a pretty uncommon benefit.

Plus if my 4 year old is home with a 103 fever, I'd rather take my leave. I could see this benefit being useful for a teacher workday closure or something, but not a snow day or a sick day.

Anonymous wrote:There's backup day care that the employer can pay for if they want their employees to have it. We do have that, with bright horizons, and it's useful. But if my elementary-school aged kid is sick, I'm staying home, and I can either take leave or work. My employer would prefer to have me work.

I have this too but its of limited use. Usually you find out your kid is sick in the morning and I have never been able to get a same day placement. They can usually cover the next day though.

There's backup day care that the employer can pay for if they want their employees to have it. We do have that, with bright horizons, and it's useful. But if my elementary-school aged kid is sick, I'm staying home, and I can either take leave or work. My employer would prefer to have me work.

Anonymous wrote:You say reliable childcare and then you mean it to have coverage when camp closes. No! I do have reliable childcare, but if my aftercare or camp closes, then by definition I do not. My backup plan is taking annual leave.

My kids are 2,5,8. They don't veg in front of the TV all day anyways. They'd have activities and be playing when I'm working. The oldest likes to read. I absolutely can't work with the 2 year old home though. The others are fine and don't need me nonstop.

This. Reliable childcare is reasonable and necessary. Back up care is pretty much only for people who have physically able, local, retired parents. That's why parents need to be able to use their leave.

I WFH and I do have reliable childcare because one kid is in late elementary school and the other is in full time day care. If one of them is sick or school closes, my husband (who isn't remote) and I will take turns using leave, or divvy it up based on who has work commitments that can't be moved or delayed.

I work on weekends only and have family watch the kid. Older child who doesn't live with me can watch the kid at times. My work also allows me to take the child along. Too many options. Never had to pay for childcare.

Anonymous wrote:You say reliable childcare and then you mean it to have coverage when camp closes. No! I do have reliable childcare, but if my aftercare or camp closes, then by definition I do not. My backup plan is taking annual leave.

My kids are 2,5,8. They don't veg in front of the TV all day anyways. They'd have activities and be playing when I'm working. The oldest likes to read. I absolutely can't work with the 2 year old home though. The others are fine and don't need me nonstop.

This. There's reliable childcare and then there's expecting people to never, ever have a childcare emergency. If someone has a "childcare emergency" multiple times a month, I can understand being critical and saying they need to figure something out. But if you're upset because a few times a year, a working parent needs to either take off last minute or may allow an older child (not a 2 year old, agree that's impossible) to stay home while they work, they you're really just saying you don't think parents should work unless they have a SAHP or a nanny. But even then -- sometimes a SAHP or nanny have their own healthcare emergency. Stuff happens. This is life.

I'm confused by your question. I have a school-age kid and we pay for aftercare. But we still have to "piece it together" during breaks from school and in the summer, which usually takes the form of paying for a camp or using leave (often my spouse and I will split the day and each take a half day off, which is less disruptive than one of us being off completely).

But I mean, if camp is cancelled, and we have work that has to be done and can't last minute take off, then yeah, my kid might be around the house while I work. Camp *is* childcare, that's why I paid for it, and if it gets cancelled last minute, I don't know what else I'm supposed to do. I feel like we do well overall at planning in advance and making sure there is coverage, but nothing is ever perfect and stuff comes up. My job is pretty flexible about this and I'd never lie about my kid being home sick or playing in the background while I work -- I'm good at my job and get my work done.

But some of these responses make it sound like I should be expected to have a nanny on call or the ability to call in a sitter for a random Tuesday, just in case my kid gets sick or there's a snow day or a day camp gets cancelled. That's unreasonable. If you that's the kind of coverage people are expecting, then you need to get used to parents taking a lot more time off of work to deal with last-minute childcare issues, or you need to pay people enough for them to be able to pay the premium necessary to have that level of rock solid reliable backup plan.

You say reliable childcare and then you mean it to have coverage when camp closes. No! I do have reliable childcare, but if my aftercare or camp closes, then by definition I do not. My backup plan is taking annual leave.

My kids are 2,5,8. They don't veg in front of the TV all day anyways. They'd have activities and be playing when I'm working. The oldest likes to read. I absolutely can't work with the 2 year old home though. The others are fine and don't need me nonstop.

Anonymous wrote:We stagger hours (so I work 7-3:30 and DH works 8:30-5). Kids are in elementary/preschool from about ~8:30-4 (including time on the bus).

During school breaks we generally use backup camp. Sometimes I take the day off to do something with my older DC while the younger one is in preschool. Sick days we will sometimes work while relying on the tv babysitter, but usually we each end up doing a shortened day. As a general rule, I really dislike trying to work with kid(s) in the house so I try to avoid it.

We also stagger schedules. For breaks we either (i) take time off or (ii) have the grandparents come over and hang out with the kids. We use full-time camps in the summer.