Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 12:00     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Yes! My older two (DDs) are still like this at 9 and 11. Basically we have to be going on an outing for there to be any peace. We also have a 4 yo son- if one DD has a sleepover or sporting event, the other sibling can easily have a "quiet day at home" with DS. But DDs are oil and water and cannot coexist without constant intervention. Even at camps, after care, etc. the teachers put them in separate groups. (And these are kids who otherwise get glowing behavior remarks - I get texts from parents about how kind they are at a sleepover, or from the teacher about how inclusive they were in class) - but they can't help but be aholes to each other. It's so stressful and honestly embarrassing - they don't rein the fighting even around company.
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 11:45     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This isn't us either. My kids can play together for a whole day at home/yard There will be some parts where they annoy each other but for the most part they are very good together 5 and 8 year old girls. I specifically dont like to sign up for any sunday activities to give them this chance to just hang out and create their own games.


Having girls must be nice. We have boys and they play fight all the time. It’s playing but it’s annoying to me. OP, have them go to separate rooms and see a time for when they can come out.


DP here. I have girls. They don’t physically fight but they annoy/needle each other constantly. They also overreact/act offended for silly little reasons. It’s exhausting. They are teens now and it’s honestly not that much better except they are busier and gone more often.


I have two girls (9,11) and the bickering is constant. Lots of teasing, tattling, just generally having a low threshold for annoyance with each other. They fight over tv shows, seats at the table, "she's copying me," singing over each other, arguing about everything from math problems, grammar, to whether an object should be described as fuschia or pink. They don't physically fight ever.
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 11:33     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This isn't us either. My kids can play together for a whole day at home/yard There will be some parts where they annoy each other but for the most part they are very good together 5 and 8 year old girls. I specifically dont like to sign up for any sunday activities to give them this chance to just hang out and create their own games.


Having girls must be nice. We have boys and they play fight all the time. It’s playing but it’s annoying to me. OP, have them go to separate rooms and see a time for when they can come out.


DP here. I have girls. They don’t physically fight but they annoy/needle each other constantly. They also overreact/act offended for silly little reasons. It’s exhausting. They are teens now and it’s honestly not that much better except they are busier and gone more often.


I have boys. There's none of the psychological drama. Most fights are physical, someone gets bloodied, and the furniture or walls are broken, but it's over within an hour.
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 11:30     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This isn't us either. My kids can play together for a whole day at home/yard There will be some parts where they annoy each other but for the most part they are very good together 5 and 8 year old girls. I specifically dont like to sign up for any sunday activities to give them this chance to just hang out and create their own games.


Having girls must be nice. We have boys and they play fight all the time. It’s playing but it’s annoying to me. OP, have them go to separate rooms and see a time for when they can come out.


DP here. I have girls. They don’t physically fight but they annoy/needle each other constantly. They also overreact/act offended for silly little reasons. It’s exhausting. They are teens now and it’s honestly not that much better except they are busier and gone more often.
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 10:28     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This isn't us either. My kids can play together for a whole day at home/yard There will be some parts where they annoy each other but for the most part they are very good together 5 and 8 year old girls. I specifically dont like to sign up for any sunday activities to give them this chance to just hang out and create their own games.


Having girls must be nice. We have boys and they play fight all the time. It’s playing but it’s annoying to me. OP, have them go to separate rooms and see a time for when they can come out.


As a 3x girl mom, it boggles my mind that people think they wouldn't fight. Mine are 7, 9, and 12 and my home is filled with drama. Yes, it's probably different than boy fighting sometimes (though it certainly can get physical), but there's definitely fighting.

Like the 2 girl mom PP, we also can have quiet days full of play. My oldest and youngest recently made a paper and cardboard Jeopardy game and played it with each other on a Sunday afternoon. But we can also have plenty of "she looked at me wrong!" moments.
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 10:22     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Anonymous wrote:When they’re older. We were out of the house by 8am on weekend mornings for years. Then one day we suddenly didn’t have to.


+1.When they're in their teens, they'll be asleep til 10 am
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 09:49     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
When they’re older. We were out of the house by 8am on weekend mornings for years. Then one day we suddenly didn’t have to.
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 09:47     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Anonymous wrote:We have this problem a lot. I feel like our days go better when we have morning activities. I also hear other people talk about how nice it is to be lazy on a Saturday morning and have no where to go…. this hasn’t been true for us!


Mine are now 9 and 7 and it's better, but not over. It definitely is better when we have somewhere to be. A little bit of slowness (say, no where to go before 9:30am) works well. But if we have too much time they will just fight. We try to get at least one of them out of the house to do an errand, even if it's a short one. That always helps.
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 09:45     Subject: Re:impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
We like to be out and about on weekend mornings, and then have quiet afternoons at home. Kids have less energy to annoy each other in the afternoon.
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 08:04     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Bluey
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 08:04     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Anonymous wrote:op here - got busy and forgot about this post until now. The screen poster was not me

Our house isn't really set up for them them to do things in their room but its worth a shot to try that. While the 5 year old can be irritating (very loud, wacky humor etc), its mainly the 7 year old that sparks it with competing for my attention, trying to one up his brother and make sure he's "better" on everything, having big reactions to the 5yos obnoxious behavior etc.

It feels like by 8:45 every weekend morning I'm trying to get them out of the house as quickly as possible because we're all already grouches from the fighting and then repeat for the afternoon. They get along much better out at a park or museum or something and either play well together or do their own thing more, but its exhausting to never be able to have a more low key day and I think they'd benefit from that too if we could find a way to do it without spiraling


Exercise videos. Cosmic Kids Yoga
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 08:02     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Just put them on two different screens.


No thanks. I’d rather hear normal
Healthy arguing and conversation than two zombied out kids who can only self regulate through an ipad!!


But they are NOT self regulating. What is "healthy arguing"?
Anonymous
Post 04/29/2024 07:37     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
op here - got busy and forgot about this post until now. The screen poster was not me

Our house isn't really set up for them them to do things in their room but its worth a shot to try that. While the 5 year old can be irritating (very loud, wacky humor etc), its mainly the 7 year old that sparks it with competing for my attention, trying to one up his brother and make sure he's "better" on everything, having big reactions to the 5yos obnoxious behavior etc.

It feels like by 8:45 every weekend morning I'm trying to get them out of the house as quickly as possible because we're all already grouches from the fighting and then repeat for the afternoon. They get along much better out at a park or museum or something and either play well together or do their own thing more, but its exhausting to never be able to have a more low key day and I think they'd benefit from that too if we could find a way to do it without spiraling
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 16:10     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Ive never had kids that like quiet mornings either. We love weekend activities. Get up and go do something! I dont understand families who sit at home happily.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 15:11     Subject: impossible to have a "quiet morning at home" because of sibling fighting?
Try parenting differently and looking at each child's needs and give consequences.