Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 11:59     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Anonymous wrote:DD 16 has been best friends with a girl (larla) and a boy (Jeff) all school year. DD and Jeff are not dating but hang out alone and are very flirty. Larla has a boy (Steve) that she hangs out and flirts with. Sometimes the four of them do “double dates”.

For the past few weeks Jeff has had a lot less contact with DD and is hanging out more with larla. DD has mentioned it a couple times, but seems to think things will go back to normal soon.

DD has ordered matching rings for herself and Jeff and plans to give him his in the next few weeks.

DD is shy and quiet and these are her only friends. I’m worried this whole thing is going to blow up and she will be absolutely heartbroken. I sort of want to warn her. But also don’t want to intervene in teen drama. WWYD?


Why not? This is your daughter! You need to guide her through life, there is no better time than now. Nobody expects you to face off Jeff and demand he explains his behavior. But your parental responsibility is to provide your own daughter (!!!) with your perspective and, at the very least, explain, why rings are a terrible mistake. Where were you when she was ordering them and making her stupid plan? It was a very bad idea all along, regardless of Larla.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 11:52     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
I wouldn’t forbid her from giving the ring. I would recommend she thinks long and hard of the possibility that he won’t accept the ring and then, tell Larla about it. News like this travels fast.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 11:51     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
This is part of growing up. Teenage heartbreak, putting yourself out there and getting burned or pleasantly surprised. You can't protect her from this, nor should you try.

Unless she asks you for advice, MYOB
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 11:44     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Please do not let her give him any rings.



OP here. Ugh. I agree, but also I hate this. DD selected and purchased these on her own. Spent $60 of her own money. Now I tell her she shouldn’t give it. There’s a strong possibility that I’m going to be blamed for the outcome of things if I start telling her what to do.


You’re going to have to mom up and forbid her giving the rings, take them from her. It doesn’t matter how much hate she directs at you, that’s far better than the humiliation.


That is crazy
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 11:39     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Please do not let her give him any rings.



OP here. Ugh. I agree, but also I hate this. DD selected and purchased these on her own. Spent $60 of her own money. Now I tell her she shouldn’t give it. There’s a strong possibility that I’m going to be blamed for the outcome of things if I start telling her what to do.


You’re going to have to mom up and forbid her giving the rings, take them from her. It doesn’t matter how much hate she directs at you, that’s far better than the humiliation.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 11:00     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Anonymous wrote:Why does everyone use larla here? Is there some kind of inside joke?


Local dialect.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 10:57     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Why does everyone use larla here? Is there some kind of inside joke?
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 10:47     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Anonymous wrote:Teach your daughter to attract, not chase. The End



+1

Teens that are insecure chase people.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 09:03     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
The ring thing are insane. It's going to hurt Jeff or DD or both. Everyone who sees or hears about it is likely to turn against DD.
Assuming Jeff didn't ask for a ring or they didn't already discuss it, it's not OK for her to pressure Jeff like that. He's not her property to decorate.
Teach your child to respect personal boundaries.

I get that kids make mistakes, but this one seems not worth the pain.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 08:39     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Please do not let her give him any rings.


OP here. Ugh. I agree, but also I hate this. DD selected and purchased these on her own. Spent $60 of her own money. Now I tell her she shouldn’t give it. There’s a strong possibility that I’m going to be blamed for the outcome of things if I start telling her what to do.


Agree OP. If she didn’t ask for your input before getting them, it’s because she doesn’t want it. I think everyone knows this isn’t likely to go over well and you just have to let it play out.

On the flip side, her being mad at you and out $60 may be the less painful outcome
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 08:32     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Please do not let her give him any rings.


OP here. Ugh. I agree, but also I hate this. DD selected and purchased these on her own. Spent $60 of her own money. Now I tell her she shouldn’t give it. There’s a strong possibility that I’m going to be blamed for the outcome of things if I start telling her what to do.


OP, I agree with some of the other posters that you can try to have a conversation with her about it. However, I don’t know that can do much to stop it if she is determined to give the ring to him. I know if I pushed my DD she would still do it. Unfortunately, this is your DD’s life experience to have and you can try to make it easier/gentler but I’m not sure you can stop it entirely.

It’s so hard to watch them go through stuff like this. I’m sorry.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 08:12     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Anonymous wrote:Ask zendaya


Or Kelly, Dylan, and Brenda
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 04:42     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Please do not let her give him any rings.


OP here. Ugh. I agree, but also I hate this. DD selected and purchased these on her own. Spent $60 of her own money. Now I tell her she shouldn’t give it. There’s a strong possibility that I’m going to be blamed for the outcome of things if I start telling her what to do.


But what’s the point of the rings?

You need to guide your kid. Don’t tell her what to do, but guide her and listen and talk with her. Maybe you have missed some crucial details.

The rings sound like a huge, mortifying mistake IMO. Sixty dollars is absolutely nothing vs the lost pride, embarrassing heartbreak, and possible lost friendships it seems she’s facing.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2024 01:54     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Teach your daughter to attract, not chase. The End

Anonymous
Post 04/27/2024 23:26     Subject: Love triangle wwyd?
Please convince your DD to keep both rings. Pay her the full $60 if necessary to buy them from her. This will blow up in her face bad. Many of us had to learn the hard way never to give gifts to mere crushes. Hugs!