Anonymous
06/09/2024 20:08
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
Anonymous wrote:I absolutely noticed this uptick too. I think it is because of two things. 1) most EU countries have better health care and easier access to therapists, so young people are going more. And 2) the au pair agencies are asking them “have you ever been to a therapist” and they think they have to be honest, so they say yes. It’s not like a job application where you can hide stuff about yourself. Our current au pair went to the school therapist after her parents divorced and she said everyone she knew had gone to the school therapist at some point and they thought they had to list that.
Yes, I'm seeing people disclose acne or some minor medical thing like an unknown rash that came up once years ago as a medical condition. They clearly feel like they have to share everything. And be glad that they do, given that some of these things being raised are definitely red flags that I would screen out. Much better than them hiding issues only to have it be an issue during their year.
Anonymous
04/28/2024 22:16
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
The pandemic is taking a toll
Anonymous
04/25/2024 21:33
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here -in addition to the medical disclosures, I have noticed (this is new too!) there is a trend of more essays about dynamics with family - about not talking to a parent, or bad relationships with a parent- why disclose this as a first impression????? where it is supposed to be about why you want to be an au pair.... honestly I'm having a hard time figuring out about inviting a non-potential drama person into home!
Yikes. Who would want a young woman in their home for a year if she can’t even get along with her own family? And has such bad judgment that she thinks she should share this unsolicited information?
We just left the Au pair program because of just this - so many girls coming into this program for the wrong reasons and have no interest in kids whatsoever. Our last had so much family drama at home it affected our dynamic. Terrible. Mental issues clearly undisclosed…until after the fact.
Anonymous
04/25/2024 20:01
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
Anonymous wrote:OP here -in addition to the medical disclosures, I have noticed (this is new too!) there is a trend of more essays about dynamics with family - about not talking to a parent, or bad relationships with a parent- why disclose this as a first impression????? where it is supposed to be about why you want to be an au pair.... honestly I'm having a hard time figuring out about inviting a non-potential drama person into home!
Yikes. Who would want a young woman in their home for a year if she can’t even get along with her own family? And has such bad judgment that she thinks she should share this unsolicited information?
Anonymous
04/22/2024 13:03
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
OP here -in addition to the medical disclosures, I have noticed (this is new too!) there is a trend of more essays about dynamics with family - about not talking to a parent, or bad relationships with a parent- why disclose this as a first impression????? where it is supposed to be about why you want to be an au pair.... honestly I'm having a hard time figuring out about inviting a non-potential drama person into home!
Anonymous
04/19/2024 19:47
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
Anonymous wrote:Have you not seen these threads where everyone has their kid drugged for adhd?
As a successfully medicated adult, I don’t disclose my diagnosis to my employer, ask for accommodations, or schedule appointments during my work time.
Perhaps there is more disclosure because these women will be living with their employer, but not all jobs can accommodate all people. The whole point of having an au pair is because you need reliable childcare and your schedule doesn’t align with traditional childcare options. Having a provider who is not stable is not an option for most families. I can’t drop everything at work because my au pair has a mental breakdown.
Anonymous
04/19/2024 19:41
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
I am college professor in an intimate program so on the one hand I am used to this stuff and have gotten to know a lot of these young adults as more than their disclosures, but on the other hand, if I still had a young child I would not be comfortable with this as an au pair situation.
Anonymous
04/19/2024 19:40
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
Yikes, they need not to apply to work with young kids!
Anonymous
04/19/2024 19:37
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
Anonymous wrote:I have hosted au pairs for many years -- and have noticed, in looking for this fall, that there are only a handful of available "quality" profiles without major psychological issues? I was wondering if anyone else is having same experience? (Granted, I am looking in a subgroup of European au pairs for language exposure for children....) Also, in looking at the few candidates, I noticed a lot have disclosed underlying psychological issues in their profiles -- more than in the past -- I guess there is a rise in mental health issues with young people? I am very reluctant to take on another person in the house, along with my three older children, who may have psychological issues.......... but have found few profiles in my search without....is this just the way it is right now??
Frankly, an au pair would have more difficulty putting up with your psychological issues.
Anonymous
04/19/2024 15:08
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
I wish this cohort would finally STFU about their mental state. Or at least, save all the unsolicited disclosures for people you know will genuinely care. Like your mother.
Anonymous
04/19/2024 14:23
Subject: is it me, or are there fewer au pairs available this fall without psychological issues?
Anonymous wrote:I absolutely noticed this uptick too. I think it is because of two things. 1) most EU countries have better health care and easier access to therapists, so young people are going more. And 2) the au pair agencies are asking them “have you ever been to a therapist” and they think they have to be honest, so they say yes. It’s not like a job application where you can hide stuff about yourself. Our current au pair went to the school therapist after her parents divorced and she said everyone she knew had gone to the school therapist at some point and they thought they had to list that.
As someone living in the EU I'm quite curious what these EU countries are that have easier access to therapists.