Anonymous wrote:You have to make sure you aren't getting in the way of time with their significant other's family. The young couple will want to make it fair. You want to be sensitive that you're not luring them with expensive vacations for any wrong reasons.

Sorry, no. That's not our problem. That's a decision of the kids and between them. If they want to go with us/them/neither, that's their decision and we'll respect it either way and we expect other families to do so, as well. If they don't, that's on them.

I'd always pay for a vacation as a family if I organize it. I think that's normal tbh. Will we do it often? Probably not because we couldn't afford it depending on how many people/kids.

My parents stopped paying when I graduated from law school. We don't take big family vacations, but they come to stay with us for at least a year. I try to plan an annual trip with my mom and sister, and we each pay our own way, although lately, my sister and I split my mom's expenses. She doesn't have access to very much money of her own because my dad is very controlling. I am guessing we'll host them when our kids get older because we have a ski home. I doubt we'll cover their flight costs or ski passes, unless we end up with a lot more than expected in retirement, then maybe.

One kid is 31 and another is 28. We still invite them and will pay for lodging, meals, and entertainment. They have to pay to get there. If they want to bring a significant other we would extend the same to that person.

We still pay and kids are late 20's/early 30s. Obviously we take vacations without them and vice versa, but we do a trip every year or two - skiing or international travel. We pay for everything, including spouses. We also pay when they come to visit us, whether for a holiday like Christmas or to the beach house in the summer. They could afford it, but we can afford it very easily so it doesn't make sense for them to stretch for it.

Anonymous wrote:We won’t ever. Plan to cover a family vacation including spouses forever.

This. Otherwise they will.go.on their own. Without you.

I’m in a mother daughter trip with my 23 yo right now. Paying for everything. The time together is worth every penny!

Anonymous wrote:If you want your kids for sure to keep coming - keep paying.

Not necessarily. We paid if we went on vacation with either side of the parents.

Anonymous wrote:Assuming my kid is in a long term relationship I really can’t imagine telling my kid “we’d love to have you join us for vacation but if your SO is coming they need to pay their own way”.

This^.

Anonymous wrote:We won’t ever. Plan to cover a family vacation including spouses forever.

This is us.

We are fortunate to be able to cover it all, and it would be a dream if my kids and their families wanted to all vacation with us My kids are 18 and 22 right now, and this summer is likely our last annual big trip since our oldest is graduating and starting his full time job in the fall.

I would also love if DH and I could also take my grandkids on extravagant trips each year. I’d probably offer to go this even if my kids and their spouses didn’t want want to vacation all together in the future.

If you want your kids for sure to keep coming - keep paying.

We didn't do vacations during college because of tuition bills, and kids worked during the summer to have extra cash.

Afterwards, we did when their schedules would permit it.

Trying to organize family vacations when your kids are married and have kids is very difficult for all the reasons you can imagine. We have a winter home with a pool next to the beach and they all come at different times for a week. They pay their own airfare and pay for whatever activities they want to do. At Christmas we give each of the three families a very large check and they can use that as they see fit.

You have to make sure you aren't getting in the way of time with their significant other's family. The young couple will want to make it fair. You want to be sensitive that you're not luring them with expensive vacations for any wrong reasons.

My parents pay for ours still and I will for my kids. If they are invited we pay.