We lived in Lake Forest for a long time and loved it, except there was little diversity. Great range of housing stock from lake front mansions to MC neighborhoods. Beautiful though somewhat sleepy town center. Outstanding schools from ES to HS. About an hour or less train ride into the city and in the summer there is no city better than Chicago. The winters are long and can wear you down but you get use to it. We’ve lived all over the country and it was my favorite place.

Anonymous wrote:I have a close friend that lives in Highland park and loves it. Not Jewish (which I mention since Pp said you have to be Jewish to fit in there).

But I’ll also admit my metric might be off because I have lived in the DC area for almost 30 years and now live in bethesda, and afaik, have never met anyone who skied in aspen, or went to Bali or anything like that. I’m wondering where you were living! Most of the people I know vacation at national parks or rehobeth or disney and maybe occasionally go to London or Italy or Ireland. I guess my point is that if you’re hanging out mostly with really rich people (eg send your kids to private schools like Sitwell) then that’s what you’ll find but there are probably lots of normal folk pretty much anywhere.

Raised in Deerfield as one of the rare poor persons in town. Schools were really good but not at all diverse. Top of the class went to great schools - Princeton, Dartmouth, Northwestern, Harvard, Duke, Cornell, Michigan and Illinois. Deerfield had a very strong middle; Highland Park a really world class top of the class.

Some of the wealthy went to Colorado or UDenver to ski. The western portion of Highland Park can choose either Highland Park high school or Deerfield. About 50/50 - Deerfield generally better for sports, except for basketball. I chose Deerfield for sports and we had two state champion teams. Living in the choice zone - a fairly big area - is a bonus as they have different strengths. A theater or arts kid will find HP great with some of the best facilities and programs around. Highwood (a good night life place) takes in some tougher kids but HP is a great school.

Lots of Jewish people at DHS. I had no education in my home and it was a benefit to have Jewish friends in terms of being exposed to a culture of learning. I was a tough kid with very little culture - my friends insisted I study and I owe them a huge debt. Most were not athletes but were very respectful to me and my brother and were just excellent people. Ended up marrying a Jewish woman because I was used to the culture. D 113 a very good school district, if a little divorced from the real world.

To answer questions re the Glenbrook schools, they are excellent. The GBN guys I competed against in sports were very good academically, and went to great schools. Not much different than Deerfield. GBS the same too. My mother just preferred Lake County. So did I. Depends on your preference.

Stevenson even slightly better than Deerfield. People move to the Lake County side of Buffalo Grove to get into Stevenson. Lake Forest (my mother's high school) is excellent and includes Lake Bluff people.

For a flat prairie area, Lake County Forest Preserves are among the best I have come across. The Preserves alone make the area a highlight. So does proximity to Wisconsin.

I have a close friend that lives in Highland park and loves it. Not Jewish (which I mention since Pp said you have to be Jewish to fit in there).

But I’ll also admit my metric might be off because I have lived in the DC area for almost 30 years and now live in bethesda, and afaik, have never met anyone who skied in aspen, or went to Bali or anything like that. I’m wondering where you were living! Most of the people I know vacation at national parks or rehobeth or disney and maybe occasionally go to London or Italy or Ireland. I guess my point is that if you’re hanging out mostly with really rich people (eg send your kids to private schools like Sitwell) then that’s what you’ll find but there are probably lots of normal folk pretty much anywhere.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grew up in Wilmette as a non-wealthy family. Had a great childhood and loved school. New Trier is huge but my siblings and I each found our niche and had great experiences. That was decades ago and you know your kids and whether they would enjoy a pressure cooker environment. I don’t think it is that different from the DC suburbs (lived there), NY suburbs (sibling is there) or any affluent suburb.

I would look at Deerfield over HP. If we had stayed, we would have looked there.

Also, note that the state of Illinois’ finances are a mess. Don’t know how that affects day to day life but I do know a fair number of people who have left the state once their kids go to college,

I was raised in Deerfield. There is definitely academic pressure but it is a safe and nice community to live. The Lake County Forest Preserve system is really good and makes for a good outlet in an otherwise flat and drab place. My brother and I were very poor (unusual for Deerfield) and yet the schools prepared us for some of the best schools in the nation. I think I floated on my Deerfield education for years, even on to one of the better professional schools in the country. Speaks to great social mobility. I don't think Deerfield is that snobby as my friends who remain there live in modest but nice places but no getting around the academic pressures. Bear in mind that except for a magnet school like TJ there are no public schools the academic quality of Deerfield, New Trier or Stevenson in the DMV. These schools are no cakewalk, and of course they are not diverse.

What do you think of the Glenbrooks? I have so far not been impressed with highly rated districts including Deerfield. I’ve heard people speak highly of the Glenbrooks, so I’m skeptical there too.

I'm in the GBS district, but my kids are still in elementary. People seem pretty thrilled with the high schools. Folks say it's almost like a college with tons of course offerings and clubs. I believe there are two unique tracks, one I think with an international focus and one with more of an arts focus. I think they include kids from both Glenbrook high schools and are competitive. And GBS, at least, is (significantly?) more diverse than the lakefront communities and Deerfield. You have folks living in mobile homes and folks in brand new 7000 square foot homes.

My experience has been with K-5, and I've found the teachers to be generally good and the 3rd-5th school administration to be outstanding. I have a classic 2E kid and they offered supports where he shined and where he struggled, all without a 504 and without my asking. The reading language arts gifted program for 3rd-5th graders is particularly strong - and unique (kids are identified using a largely transparent matrix in 3rd and stay with the same group through 5th, 9 hours/week. retesting again for 6th grade.)

I think the Glenview housing stock is generally pretty ugly compared to eastern and northern suburbs. But we have half an acre with huge oaks, something we couldn't afford in the New Trier district. We have a great library and great community center. And Costco, Whole Foods, Trader Joe's, etc. are all minutes away. We're also about a mile from getting on bike paths in the forest preserves. And we have the only 4H program in Cook County, at a farm where we have a community garden. My kids are growing up growing their food and seeing horses, cows, chickens, etc., all summer long. All in the middle of a neighborhood where new builds are going for $1.8-3 million.

I went to New Trier and am hoping the Glenbrook schools aren't quite the pressure cooker New Trier was when I attended.

I am late to this thread, but I read an article from the Tribune saying that almost no kids from the Glenbrooks go on to attend Ivy League schools. That’s not to say they don’t attend very good schools. But the most popular choice for grads actually is Oakton Community College. That was surprising to me, who grew up hearing so much about the Glenbrooks.

I don’t know about Deerfield. Stevenson and New Trier seem more college prep and elite college minded.

Grew up in Wilmette after living half my childhood in DC.

The North Shore suburbs are very beautiful with nice housing stock, beach access, easy access to the city, and good schools. Very safe. Evanston is nearby.

Yes it is competitive, materialistic, and a bit of a bubble, but that is just the nature of living in affluent areas. There are pros and cons of course. The schools are good with great academics, arts, sports, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH and I left DC about 8 years ago due to high COL, the competetive snobbery, and stress with commutes plus two little kids. We moved to a smaller city with lower cost of living. On the whole it’s been great. We both like our jobs, have a great house that’s doubled in value, kids are doing well in elementary school, and we have made great friends. Cons are the area is isolated and hard to get to for our east coast families, there are not a ton of amenities - limits restaurants, no upscale shopping, etc. the middle school options are dicey but doable, and there are limited sports options (which is nice but not great if say my kids gets super into softball, there is a decent elementary league but not beyond).


A job opportunity presented itself for my husband north of Chicago. We would likely live in one of the northern suburbs (ie willmette, highland park) etc. does anyone know anything about the culture? I would never move back to dc because I had such a terrible experience with snobs, self obsessed competetive people in the work place, etc. I don’t want my kids growing up feeling less than, and with peers who do things like ski in Aspen, fly private, go to Bali, etc. and with extreme materialism.

Our HHI is about 450k and would go up to about 650k with the move. Aside from some obvious things, like much higher property taxes, this move does seem appealing. Any advice? It isn’t really a huge promotion for my husband, but it’s with a bigger company with some big perks.

It's all where you choose to live - the DC area is FILLED with true middle class and low income people who are not as you describe above, but you chose to live among a wealthier set, it seems. Similarly, the northern suburbs of Chicago will be wealthy. So, use people's advice here on locations to find a truly diverse neighborhood.

This. As a person from the Chicago area who now lives in DC, it's about your choices. I feel people are significantly less snobbish in my DC neighborhood than my suburban Chicago experience and that's because there's diversity (racial, religious, socioeconomic) in my neighborhood that still doesn't exist there. Chicago is wonderful but it is an extraordinarily segregated city with segregated suburbs. Given your HHI you're not going to be poor pretty much anywhere you choose to live. Whether you actually want to seek out more diverse areas is entirely up to you but the northern suburbs and even the wealthy western suburbs are going to be no different than wealthy DC areas, and if you send your kids to somewhere like Parker in the city it's going to be no different than sending your kid to Sidwell, etc...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH and I left DC about 8 years ago due to high COL, the competetive snobbery, and stress with commutes plus two little kids. We moved to a smaller city with lower cost of living. On the whole it’s been great. We both like our jobs, have a great house that’s doubled in value, kids are doing well in elementary school, and we have made great friends. Cons are the area is isolated and hard to get to for our east coast families, there are not a ton of amenities - limits restaurants, no upscale shopping, etc. the middle school options are dicey but doable, and there are limited sports options (which is nice but not great if say my kids gets super into softball, there is a decent elementary league but not beyond).


A job opportunity presented itself for my husband north of Chicago. We would likely live in one of the northern suburbs (ie willmette, highland park) etc. does anyone know anything about the culture? I would never move back to dc because I had such a terrible experience with snobs, self obsessed competetive people in the work place, etc. I don’t want my kids growing up feeling less than, and with peers who do things like ski in Aspen, fly private, go to Bali, etc. and with extreme materialism.

Our HHI is about 450k and would go up to about 650k with the move. Aside from some obvious things, like much higher property taxes, this move does seem appealing. Any advice? It isn’t really a huge promotion for my husband, but it’s with a bigger company with some big perks.

It's all where you choose to live - the DC area is FILLED with true middle class and low income people who are not as you describe above, but you chose to live among a wealthier set, it seems. Similarly, the northern suburbs of Chicago will be wealthy. So, use people's advice here on locations to find a truly diverse neighborhood.

This.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grew up in Wilmette as a non-wealthy family. Had a great childhood and loved school. New Trier is huge but my siblings and I each found our niche and had great experiences. That was decades ago and you know your kids and whether they would enjoy a pressure cooker environment. I don’t think it is that different from the DC suburbs (lived there), NY suburbs (sibling is there) or any affluent suburb.

I would look at Deerfield over HP. If we had stayed, we would have looked there.

Also, note that the state of Illinois’ finances are a mess. Don’t know how that affects day to day life but I do know a fair number of people who have left the state once their kids go to college,

I was raised in Deerfield. There is definitely academic pressure but it is a safe and nice community to live. The Lake County Forest Preserve system is really good and makes for a good outlet in an otherwise flat and drab place. My brother and I were very poor (unusual for Deerfield) and yet the schools prepared us for some of the best schools in the nation. I think I floated on my Deerfield education for years, even on to one of the better professional schools in the country. Speaks to great social mobility. I don't think Deerfield is that snobby as my friends who remain there live in modest but nice places but no getting around the academic pressures. Bear in mind that except for a magnet school like TJ there are no public schools the academic quality of Deerfield, New Trier or Stevenson in the DMV. These schools are no cakewalk, and of course they are not diverse.

What do you think of the Glenbrooks? I have so far not been impressed with highly rated districts including Deerfield. I’ve heard people speak highly of the Glenbrooks, so I’m skeptical there too.

I'm in the GBS district, but my kids are still in elementary. People seem pretty thrilled with the high schools. Folks say it's almost like a college with tons of course offerings and clubs. I believe there are two unique tracks, one I think with an international focus and one with more of an arts focus. I think they include kids from both Glenbrook high schools and are competitive. And GBS, at least, is (significantly?) more diverse than the lakefront communities and Deerfield. You have folks living in mobile homes and folks in brand new 7000 square foot homes.

My experience has been with K-5, and I've found the teachers to be generally good and the 3rd-5th school administration to be outstanding. I have a classic 2E kid and they offered supports where he shined and where he struggled, all without a 504 and without my asking. The reading language arts gifted program for 3rd-5th graders is particularly strong - and unique (kids are identified using a largely transparent matrix in 3rd and stay with the same group through 5th, 9 hours/week. retesting again for 6th grade.)

I think the Glenview housing stock is generally pretty ugly compared to eastern and northern suburbs. But we have half an acre with huge oaks, something we couldn't afford in the New Trier district. We have a great library and great community center. And Costco, Whole Foods, Trader Joe's, etc. are all minutes away. We're also about a mile from getting on bike paths in the forest preserves. And we have the only 4H program in Cook County, at a farm where we have a community garden. My kids are growing up growing their food and seeing horses, cows, chickens, etc., all summer long. All in the middle of a neighborhood where new builds are going for $1.8-3 million.

I went to New Trier and am hoping the Glenbrook schools aren't quite the pressure cooker New Trier was when I attended.

They are the Chicago version of Bethesda, the main line, rich Boston suburbs, westchester, etc. If you really hated Bethesda, it might not be for you.

Personally I find the area beautiful, I love the housing stock, and do think Chicago is a little more laid back than its East coast cousins.

You can certainly find people of all stripes in all these locations. But if you weren’t able to do that in Bethesda, I would worry about your ability to do that in Chicagoland too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grew up in Wilmette as a non-wealthy family. Had a great childhood and loved school. New Trier is huge but my siblings and I each found our niche and had great experiences. That was decades ago and you know your kids and whether they would enjoy a pressure cooker environment. I don’t think it is that different from the DC suburbs (lived there), NY suburbs (sibling is there) or any affluent suburb.

I would look at Deerfield over HP. If we had stayed, we would have looked there.

Also, note that the state of Illinois’ finances are a mess. Don’t know how that affects day to day life but I do know a fair number of people who have left the state once their kids go to college,

I was raised in Deerfield. There is definitely academic pressure but it is a safe and nice community to live. The Lake County Forest Preserve system is really good and makes for a good outlet in an otherwise flat and drab place. My brother and I were very poor (unusual for Deerfield) and yet the schools prepared us for some of the best schools in the nation. I think I floated on my Deerfield education for years, even on to one of the better professional schools in the country. Speaks to great social mobility. I don't think Deerfield is that snobby as my friends who remain there live in modest but nice places but no getting around the academic pressures. Bear in mind that except for a magnet school like TJ there are no public schools the academic quality of Deerfield, New Trier or Stevenson in the DMV. These schools are no cakewalk, and of course they are not diverse.

What do you think of the Glenbrooks? I have so far not been impressed with highly rated districts including Deerfield. I’ve heard people speak highly of the Glenbrooks, so I’m skeptical there too.

Anonymous wrote:Grew up in Wilmette as a non-wealthy family. Had a great childhood and loved school. New Trier is huge but my siblings and I each found our niche and had great experiences. That was decades ago and you know your kids and whether they would enjoy a pressure cooker environment. I don’t think it is that different from the DC suburbs (lived there), NY suburbs (sibling is there) or any affluent suburb.

I would look at Deerfield over HP. If we had stayed, we would have looked there.

Also, note that the state of Illinois’ finances are a mess. Don’t know how that affects day to day life but I do know a fair number of people who have left the state once their kids go to college,

I was raised in Deerfield. There is definitely academic pressure but it is a safe and nice community to live. The Lake County Forest Preserve system is really good and makes for a good outlet in an otherwise flat and drab place. My brother and I were very poor (unusual for Deerfield) and yet the schools prepared us for some of the best schools in the nation. I think I floated on my Deerfield education for years, even on to one of the better professional schools in the country. Speaks to great social mobility. I don't think Deerfield is that snobby as my friends who remain there live in modest but nice places but no getting around the academic pressures. Bear in mind that except for a magnet school like TJ there are no public schools the academic quality of Deerfield, New Trier or Stevenson in the DMV. These schools are no cakewalk, and of course they are not diverse.

Anonymous wrote:I would say that Winnetka is snobby. Everywhere from Evanston up north through Lake Forest has snobby pockets, but 10 minutes west of there, a little bit off the lake shore is not snobby at all. The problem is that the less snobby areas have pretty low standards for academics, food, etc. If you are used to east coast life being around educated and demanding people, you might now be an educated and demanding pressure cooker person.

Interesting. Winnetka is pretty snobby, but restaurants in the North Shore are generally pretty dumbed down and expensive. The restaurants get better, generally, as you move from the North Shore. Saying that folks west of the lake have low standards for food and other things is just nonsense.

Plenty of schools more than ten minutes west are great, including Stevenson, Deerfield, and the Glenbrooks. And there's PLENTY of country club and snobbiness west of the lake. In fact, closer to the lake, you get more old money, and with that, fewer folks who are flaunting their wealth.

I haven't spent much time around Barrington, Long Grove, and Crystal Lake, but understand they all have plenty of snobby, too. And no one's talking about them as food destinations.

I find the PP's perspective perplexing.

Anonymous wrote:I used to live in Chicago and miss it a lot. I'd love to move there, but it is too cold for my DH.

To answer your questions: If you don't like snobs and don't want your kids feeling left out because you don't do spring break in Aspen, you'll want to think about avoiding Willmette and Highland Park. If you aren't Jewish, you might not fit in well in Highland Park, if you are Jewish, then you will. If you are still concerned with controlling your COL, which you mentioned, I'd avoid both -- they are quite expensive. However, given your HHI, you will be quite well off for Chicago. I'd consider looking into neighborhoods in the city and paying for private school if necessary (Francis Parker is great, but it might be hard to get in). A friend who lives in the loop on the lakefront actually has his elementary kids in public -- their PTA does an amazing job and the school is great.

If I were moving back and in your circumstances and really wanted a suburb, I'd probably consider Oak Park, or maybe Evanston.

But yeah, I love Chicago so much. I'd move there in a heartbeat if I could. Eat a Chicago dog for me, and walk along the lake front for me, and visit the Chagalls at the Art Institute for me, and get a Lou Malnati's pizza for me.

Only move to Oak Park if you want to pay even more ridiculous taxes and never be able to sell your house.

I would say that Winnetka is snobby. Everywhere from Evanston up north through Lake Forest has snobby pockets, but 10 minutes west of there, a little bit off the lake shore is not snobby at all. The problem is that the less snobby areas have pretty low standards for academics, food, etc. If you are used to east coast life being around educated and demanding people, you might now be an educated and demanding pressure cooker person.

Super segregated, tempered with Midwest Nice.