Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 12:03     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


So you really think every person who is interested in a FWB situation has an Std? What world are you living in?

OP-most sexually active adults try to be responsible. Meaning-they will get tested before or after a sexual encounter. And sometimes both. This is even MORE true for people who are married and engaging in extracurricular activities. Most know the stakes are high and won’t take that kind of chance. Contrary to what people constantly spout on this board-most people aren’t actively walking around with stds and spreading them.



This is so not true. At least back from when I was dating 20+ years ago. I had 20+ partners. Only one ever asked me to get tested. That's the only time I ever tested (negative). And I never asked anyone to get tested.


Yea, men are very reckless with STD testing. A lot of people on apps have HSV2; HSV1 is a pretty much a norm but I still wouldn't want to catch it for something totally casual like FWB. I would only see a man with HSV1 if I was seriously crazy about him and had hopes for a relationship/saw relationship potential


“A lot of people on apps have HSV2”. Um no. A responsible person will disclose this. And I don’t have any idea how you think you would know a lot of people have this without knowing them? Weird. Anyway, it only takes one person in the situation to be responsible “get tested or we are not having sex”. Easy.

Of course yes. 70% of the population has it. You think 70% of the profiles disclose this or people do in person? No.


70% of population has HSV1. About 14% HSV2. But it's higher percentages in large urban areas like DC: around a quarter of white adults are HSV2 positive
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 12:02     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


So you really think every person who is interested in a FWB situation has an Std? What world are you living in?

OP-most sexually active adults try to be responsible. Meaning-they will get tested before or after a sexual encounter. And sometimes both. This is even MORE true for people who are married and engaging in extracurricular activities. Most know the stakes are high and won’t take that kind of chance. Contrary to what people constantly spout on this board-most people aren’t actively walking around with stds and spreading them.



It's total BS what you describe. Men don't like to get tested; many people just sleep around. Read yourself: most people have sex on a 2-3rd date, and they date multiple partners. Why would they get tested every week?


Responsible people if they are having sex without protection are getting tested. If they are using protection, obviously not the norm. I would really hope people aren’t having unprotected sex on a 2nd or 3rd date.


Most people who use condoms still have oral sex on 2nd and 3rd date; and yes, men told me they had unprotected sex or women they slept with didn't ask to use protection. Condoms don't protect against HSV, HPV and some other skin to skin transmitted deceases. Yes, this is ugly out there.
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 12:01     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


So you really think every person who is interested in a FWB situation has an Std? What world are you living in?

OP-most sexually active adults try to be responsible. Meaning-they will get tested before or after a sexual encounter. And sometimes both. This is even MORE true for people who are married and engaging in extracurricular activities. Most know the stakes are high and won’t take that kind of chance. Contrary to what people constantly spout on this board-most people aren’t actively walking around with stds and spreading them.



This is so not true. At least back from when I was dating 20+ years ago. I had 20+ partners. Only one ever asked me to get tested. That's the only time I ever tested (negative). And I never asked anyone to get tested.


Yea, men are very reckless with STD testing. A lot of people on apps have HSV2; HSV1 is a pretty much a norm but I still wouldn't want to catch it for something totally casual like FWB. I would only see a man with HSV1 if I was seriously crazy about him and had hopes for a relationship/saw relationship potential


“A lot of people on apps have HSV2”. Um no. A responsible person will disclose this. And I don’t have any idea how you think you would know a lot of people have this without knowing them? Weird. Anyway, it only takes one person in the situation to be responsible “get tested or we are not having sex”. Easy.

Of course yes. 70% of the population has it. You think 70% of the profiles disclose this or people do in person? No.
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 12:00     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


So you really think every person who is interested in a FWB situation has an Std? What world are you living in?

OP-most sexually active adults try to be responsible. Meaning-they will get tested before or after a sexual encounter. And sometimes both. This is even MORE true for people who are married and engaging in extracurricular activities. Most know the stakes are high and won’t take that kind of chance. Contrary to what people constantly spout on this board-most people aren’t actively walking around with stds and spreading them.



This is so not true. At least back from when I was dating 20+ years ago. I had 20+ partners. Only one ever asked me to get tested. That's the only time I ever tested (negative). And I never asked anyone to get tested.


Yea, men are very reckless with STD testing. A lot of people on apps have HSV2; HSV1 is a pretty much a norm but I still wouldn't want to catch it for something totally casual like FWB. I would only see a man with HSV1 if I was seriously crazy about him and had hopes for a relationship/saw relationship potential


“A lot of people on apps have HSV2”. Um no. A responsible person will disclose this. And I don’t have any idea how you think you would know a lot of people have this without knowing them? Weird. Anyway, it only takes one person in the situation to be responsible “get tested or we are not having sex”. Easy.


It's about a quarter in dmv area that has HSV2; among which 90% AA adults. Yes, and that's what I do - ask for tests. Most men are changing partners so they might promise papers but would disappear. Exchanging tests means exclusivity expectation comes with the sex, and they don't to get enmeshed in this - much easier to have ONS and causal sex without any testing, if they don't seek a relationship

FWB is BS
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 11:58     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


So you really think every person who is interested in a FWB situation has an Std? What world are you living in?

OP-most sexually active adults try to be responsible. Meaning-they will get tested before or after a sexual encounter. And sometimes both. This is even MORE true for people who are married and engaging in extracurricular activities. Most know the stakes are high and won’t take that kind of chance. Contrary to what people constantly spout on this board-most people aren’t actively walking around with stds and spreading them.



It's total BS what you describe. Men don't like to get tested; many people just sleep around. Read yourself: most people have sex on a 2-3rd date, and they date multiple partners. Why would they get tested every week?


Responsible people if they are having sex without protection are getting tested. If they are using protection, obviously not the norm. I would really hope people aren’t having unprotected sex on a 2nd or 3rd date.
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 11:57     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


So you really think every person who is interested in a FWB situation has an Std? What world are you living in?

OP-most sexually active adults try to be responsible. Meaning-they will get tested before or after a sexual encounter. And sometimes both. This is even MORE true for people who are married and engaging in extracurricular activities. Most know the stakes are high and won’t take that kind of chance. Contrary to what people constantly spout on this board-most people aren’t actively walking around with stds and spreading them.



This is so not true. At least back from when I was dating 20+ years ago. I had 20+ partners. Only one ever asked me to get tested. That's the only time I ever tested (negative). And I never asked anyone to get tested.


Yea, men are very reckless with STD testing. A lot of people on apps have HSV2; HSV1 is a pretty much a norm but I still wouldn't want to catch it for something totally casual like FWB. I would only see a man with HSV1 if I was seriously crazy about him and had hopes for a relationship/saw relationship potential


“A lot of people on apps have HSV2”. Um no. A responsible person will disclose this. And I don’t have any idea how you think you would know a lot of people have this without knowing them? Weird. Anyway, it only takes one person in the situation to be responsible “get tested or we are not having sex”. Easy.
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 11:54     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


So you really think every person who is interested in a FWB situation has an Std? What world are you living in?

OP-most sexually active adults try to be responsible. Meaning-they will get tested before or after a sexual encounter. And sometimes both. This is even MORE true for people who are married and engaging in extracurricular activities. Most know the stakes are high and won’t take that kind of chance. Contrary to what people constantly spout on this board-most people aren’t actively walking around with stds and spreading them.



It's total BS what you describe. Men don't like to get tested; many people just sleep around. Read yourself: most people have sex on a 2-3rd date, and they date multiple partners. Why would they get tested every week?
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 11:51     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


So you really think every person who is interested in a FWB situation has an Std? What world are you living in?

OP-most sexually active adults try to be responsible. Meaning-they will get tested before or after a sexual encounter. And sometimes both. This is even MORE true for people who are married and engaging in extracurricular activities. Most know the stakes are high and won’t take that kind of chance. Contrary to what people constantly spout on this board-most people aren’t actively walking around with stds and spreading them.



This is so not true. At least back from when I was dating 20+ years ago. I had 20+ partners. Only one ever asked me to get tested. That's the only time I ever tested (negative). And I never asked anyone to get tested.


Yea, men are very reckless with STD testing. A lot of people on apps have HSV2; HSV1 is a pretty much a norm but I still wouldn't want to catch it for something totally casual like FWB. I would only see a man with HSV1 if I was seriously crazy about him and had hopes for a relationship/saw relationship potential
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 11:49     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


I have been on and off apps for 4 years. I have been with 3 men. No STDs. I ended all relationships. Yes. It is possible. You choose poorly.


3 men over 4 years? This is very few people you met who were decent and agreed to get tested, which only proves my point. Max duration of FWB arrangement is 6 months, 2m more typical. So basically you only had sex for 18 months in total with these 3 men over the course of 4 years. I masturbate more often - every other day. Don't need a man for that. I only date those who are worth it. So far I only met 2 men in one year, but both were looking for a relationship. Not FWB
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 11:49     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


So you really think every person who is interested in a FWB situation has an Std? What world are you living in?

OP-most sexually active adults try to be responsible. Meaning-they will get tested before or after a sexual encounter. And sometimes both. This is even MORE true for people who are married and engaging in extracurricular activities. Most know the stakes are high and won’t take that kind of chance. Contrary to what people constantly spout on this board-most people aren’t actively walking around with stds and spreading them.



This is so not true. At least back from when I was dating 20+ years ago. I had 20+ partners. Only one ever asked me to get tested. That's the only time I ever tested (negative). And I never asked anyone to get tested.
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 11:36     Subject: finding fwb safely
I'm trying to do it without OLD. I can't post a face pic. So far I've had luck with hospitality industry people: waiters and bartenders. An unexpected benefit is lots of free drinks and food.

I also go through my ex-boyfriends from man in the day. A lot of them are divor ed now and it's nice to reconnect
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 11:29     Subject: finding fwb safely
You need to find a Friend first. From friendship comes the benefits.

What you are looking for is a FB
Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 11:25     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


So you really think every person who is interested in a FWB situation has an Std? What world are you living in?

OP-most sexually active adults try to be responsible. Meaning-they will get tested before or after a sexual encounter. And sometimes both. This is even MORE true for people who are married and engaging in extracurricular activities. Most know the stakes are high and won’t take that kind of chance. Contrary to what people constantly spout on this board-most people aren’t actively walking around with stds and spreading them.

Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 08:37     Subject: finding fwb safely
Before they removed the explicit section it was the perfect place to meet like minded people.

The good part was that we had to log in and use a user name and those interested could send messages directly to the poster.

Anonymous
Post 03/06/2024 08:33     Subject: Re:finding fwb safely
Anonymous wrote:My answer as a woman who is dating for a little over a year on OLD: no, there is no chance to find an STD-free FWB. Men who seek for a relationship will be offended and will stray. Men who only seek sex will have infections. I bought a toy and vaginal cream, happy like a clam while dating looking for a real connection.

I don't have the time and money to waste on these arrangements take more time and medical check-ups after


I have been on and off apps for 4 years. I have been with 3 men. No STDs. I ended all relationships. Yes. It is possible. You choose poorly.