Anonymous wrote:I dont like to paint with a broad brush, but I think overall I agree with the article.

GenZ seem to really value their mental health and boundaries. They are not going to put up with some lackluster spouse who wont pull their weight. They are not going to let a nasty MIL abuse them, and I think they will take better care of their kids to protect them from toxic people. They arent afraid of therapy to confront their issues.

I also think they arent desperate for companionship, so they will hold out for someone that really ticks all the boxes.

Most won’t marry. Many won’t want kids. The birth rate will plummet. Out of those, the little navel gazer brats who thought they were perfect and actually do realize they want kids will have waited until they’re 39 to want kids and by then the Supreme Court will have outlawed invitro and they’ll be up sht creek without their avocado toast and latte.

I mean nothing matters anyway, so it’s fine. The world will turn. The sands of the desert will shift. The higher power will watch over.

I think there will be attempts at more equitable divisions of labor. That’s great. However, I do think with such pressure being placed on trying to be so perfectly egalitarian in a marriage, how biological realities will impact marriage. Also, yeah, this is a coddled generation who has been told they can do whatever they want. They were raised on social media. They’ll quit jobs in an instant if they need a mental health break or whatever. They’re super easily offended.

I mean, realistically, men need sex in a marriage to be happy. Women need connection in a marriage to need sex. There needs to be compromise. I bet it’s just the same sht as it’s always been through history. Same complaints. Same judgement and resentment and the four horsemen sht that Gottman talks about. It’s unavoidable. The only difference now is that both parties will be extra hard headed because they are filled with self centered narcissistic pride and like a bunch of therapy speak. I guess we’ll see!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are moving in the direction of no marriages.

That suggests the ones who marry, actually want to and know what they're doing.

I'm Gen X, and have been impressed with Gen Z overall. I'm sure there are lemons, as in any generation, but the ones I know seem to be smart and emotionally intelligent.

Do you really think a 20 something "knows what they are doing" with regards to marrying at a young age?

My spouse and I married when we were 20 somethings and we’re still married more than 40 years later. So, yes, some people that age do know what they are doing in terms of having found the right person and having good expectations and relationship skills.

You got lucky. You didn’t know what you were doing. If you were being honest you would say its a lot of work to maintain a happy successful marriage and not always easy.

NP. I too got married in my early 20s and have been married for 15 years. The only "luck" was meeting DH. We knew exactly who we were marrying and what we were doing. We did a lot of premarital counseling and our compatibility scores were very high. We've never had a big fight and it's not a lot of work to be married to each other. I'd say we have the happiest, most loving relationship I know. We definitely were the first to marry of our friends, but we did date for 4 years. I would say that marriage is the easiest part of my life. Zero work compared to being an employee, a daughter, a mom, a homeowner. I know both of our parents marriages are the same. Grandparents too had happy marriages.

I wonder if this is the key. If a couple has two sets of parents who are in stable happy marriages, they have had a good version of what marriage is role modeled for them, and that leads to a desire to be married, and age doesn't matter.

I dont like to paint with a broad brush, but I think overall I agree with the article.

GenZ seem to really value their mental health and boundaries. They are not going to put up with some lackluster spouse who wont pull their weight. They are not going to let a nasty MIL abuse them, and I think they will take better care of their kids to protect them from toxic people. They arent afraid of therapy to confront their issues.

I also think they arent desperate for companionship, so they will hold out for someone that really ticks all the boxes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:disagree
self-Centerdness and lack of interest in marriage hardly bode well.

Yeah.

Gen Z knows a lot of therapy speak, but that doesn't always translate into doing any kind of inner work. For instance, the word "boundaries" has been weaponized time and time again to justify self-centered decisions and even controlling behavior, like with Jonah Hill.

I do have a very satisfying marriage and a lot of that is thanks to learning all the therapy stuff, but I'm not so sure Gen Z is better than any other generation when it comes to putting these things into practice.

I bet that refusing to be pressured into marriage will have positive outcomes on marriage satisfaction, though.

Jonah Hill is 40 years old. That's not Gen Z. That's an elderly millennial.

Anonymous wrote:There’s a thread in Reddit about Gen z marrying younger than Millennials. And here’s an article on how Gen s will have healthier marriages than prior generations. Do you agree or disagree ?
https://nypost.com/2023/05/25/gen-z-is-will-have-better-marriages-than-older-generations-study/amp/

How would I know? I'm not Gen Z.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are moving in the direction of no marriages.

That suggests the ones who marry, actually want to and know what they're doing.

I'm Gen X, and have been impressed with Gen Z overall. I'm sure there are lemons, as in any generation, but the ones I know seem to be smart and emotionally intelligent.

Do you really think a 20 something "knows what they are doing" with regards to marrying at a young age?

My spouse and I married when we were 20 somethings and we’re still married more than 40 years later. So, yes, some people that age do know what they are doing in terms of having found the right person and having good expectations and relationship skills.

You got lucky. You didn’t know what you were doing. If you were being honest you would say its a lot of work to maintain a happy successful marriage and not always easy.

DP who also got married in early 20’s and I disagree with the bolded statement. Marriage is hard work… occasionally. But it should absolutely NOT be “a lot of work” - I actually think it should feel easy. (That’s not to say we never have arguments or disagreements but those are few and far between.). Only marry someone you are actually compatible with and truly commit to each other (ie don’t always be wondering if the grass is greener elsewhere). Don’t score-keep. Don’t dwell on every flaw of your partner rather than working on being the best partner YOU can be.

And above all just try to avoid drama.

Anonymous wrote:There’s a thread in Reddit about Gen z marrying younger than Millennials. And here’s an article on how Gen s will have healthier marriages than prior generations. Do you agree or disagree ?
https://nypost.com/2023/05/25/gen-z-is-will-have-better-marriages-than-older-generations-study/amp/

Disagree.

GenZ is even more self-absorbed than Millennials. Marriage requires compromise. Divorce rates will hit record levels.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are moving in the direction of no marriages.

That suggests the ones who marry, actually want to and know what they're doing.

I'm Gen X, and have been impressed with Gen Z overall. I'm sure there are lemons, as in any generation, but the ones I know seem to be smart and emotionally intelligent.

Do you really think a 20 something "knows what they are doing" with regards to marrying at a young age?

My spouse and I married when we were 20 somethings and we’re still married more than 40 years later. So, yes, some people that age do know what they are doing in terms of having found the right person and having good expectations and relationship skills.

You got lucky. You didn’t know what you were doing. If you were being honest you would say its a lot of work to maintain a happy successful marriage and not always easy.

NP. I too got married in my early 20s and have been married for 15 years. The only "luck" was meeting DH. We knew exactly who we were marrying and what we were doing. We did a lot of premarital counseling and our compatibility scores were very high. We've never had a big fight and it's not a lot of work to be married to each other. I'd say we have the happiest, most loving relationship I know. We definitely were the first to marry of our friends, but we did date for 4 years. I would say that marriage is the easiest part of my life. Zero work compared to being an employee, a daughter, a mom, a homeowner. I know both of our parents marriages are the same. Grandparents too had happy marriages.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are moving in the direction of no marriages.

That suggests the ones who marry, actually want to and know what they're doing.

I'm Gen X, and have been impressed with Gen Z overall. I'm sure there are lemons, as in any generation, but the ones I know seem to be smart and emotionally intelligent.

Do you really think a 20 something "knows what they are doing" with regards to marrying at a young age?

My spouse and I married when we were 20 somethings and we’re still married more than 40 years later. So, yes, some people that age do know what they are doing in terms of having found the right person and having good expectations and relationship skills.

You got lucky. You didn’t know what you were doing. If you were being honest you would say its a lot of work to maintain a happy successful marriage and not always easy.

We might have been lucky to meet each other when we did, but when we decided to marry we knew that it takes effort to make a relationship work. We were also lucky in that both our sets of parents had had happy successful marriages, so we had seen examples as we grew of what happy marriages looked like and what it took to maintain them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are moving in the direction of no marriages.

That suggests the ones who marry, actually want to and know what they're doing.

I'm Gen X, and have been impressed with Gen Z overall. I'm sure there are lemons, as in any generation, but the ones I know seem to be smart and emotionally intelligent.

Do you really think a 20 something "knows what they are doing" with regards to marrying at a young age?

My spouse and I married when we were 20 somethings and we’re still married more than 40 years later. So, yes, some people that age do know what they are doing in terms of having found the right person and having good expectations and relationship skills.

You got lucky. You didn’t know what you were doing. If you were being honest you would say its a lot of work to maintain a happy successful marriage and not always easy.

Isn't that true at any age?

exactly.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are moving in the direction of no marriages.

That suggests the ones who marry, actually want to and know what they're doing.

I'm Gen X, and have been impressed with Gen Z overall. I'm sure there are lemons, as in any generation, but the ones I know seem to be smart and emotionally intelligent.

+1, on both counts

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are moving in the direction of no marriages.

That suggests the ones who marry, actually want to and know what they're doing.

I'm Gen X, and have been impressed with Gen Z overall. I'm sure there are lemons, as in any generation, but the ones I know seem to be smart and emotionally intelligent.

Do you really think a 20 something "knows what they are doing" with regards to marrying at a young age?

My spouse and I married when we were 20 somethings and we’re still married more than 40 years later. So, yes, some people that age do know what they are doing in terms of having found the right person and having good expectations and relationship skills.

You got lucky. You didn’t know what you were doing. If you were being honest you would say its a lot of work to maintain a happy successful marriage and not always easy.

Isn't that true at any age?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are moving in the direction of no marriages.

That suggests the ones who marry, actually want to and know what they're doing.

I'm Gen X, and have been impressed with Gen Z overall. I'm sure there are lemons, as in any generation, but the ones I know seem to be smart and emotionally intelligent.

Do you really think a 20 something "knows what they are doing" with regards to marrying at a young age?

My spouse and I married when we were 20 somethings and we’re still married more than 40 years later. So, yes, some people that age do know what they are doing in terms of having found the right person and having good expectations and relationship skills.

You got lucky. You didn’t know what you were doing. If you were being honest you would say its a lot of work to maintain a happy successful marriage and not always easy.

I have a feeling this is just the immigrants bringing the marriage rate down due to cultural reasons