Anonymous wrote:Our nanny did exactly this and then once she was there had some convoluted reason she needed to extend by 2 more weeks. Then she came back and was a changed person, forgot to pick up one of the kids from preschool, etc. we ended up having to fire her.
Why not have her do this while you are away in the summer?
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you. We have always paid her when she traveled, but it also never happened when we needed her. We don’t take months off from work. DH has 4 weeks total and I work from home. In the summer I take the kids to my home country (not same as nanny) and between my parents and summer camps I am able to work from there. That is why we don’t need the nanny for 2.5 months in the summer. We are not super wealthy either and have been thinking about reducing the hours we pay our nanny, but haven’t done so for fear she would leave us for FT employment.
I understand that there are cultural differences at play here; I would never ask 1 month off to bury my parents.
She has not asked for paid leave, but I think she assumes we will pay her since we have always done that when she (and we) traveled even for extended time.
I think I will tell her we can’t afford to pay for a replacement on top of her salary and she can take 1 week off paid and the rest without pay.
She has already taken more than 10 days off since the year started.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don’t know why you keep talking about the time you are away as if it is equivalent to her taking vacation. She doesn’t have any control over your vacation schedule.
We agreed she would take time off while we were also out.
Anonymous wrote:I don’t know why you keep talking about the time you are away as if it is equivalent to her taking vacation. She doesn’t have any control over your vacation schedule.
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you. We have always paid her when she traveled, but it also never happened when we needed her. We don’t take months off from work. DH has 4 weeks total and I work from home. In the summer I take the kids to my home country (not same as nanny) and between my parents and summer camps I am able to work from there. That is why we don’t need the nanny for 2.5 months in the summer. We are not super wealthy either and have been thinking about reducing the hours we pay our nanny, but haven’t done so for fear she would leave us for FT employment.
I understand that there are cultural differences at play here; I would never ask 1 month off to bury my parents.
She has not asked for paid leave, but I think she assumes we will pay her since we have always done that when she (and we) traveled even for extended time.
I think I will tell her we can’t afford to pay for a replacement on top of her salary and she can take 1 week off paid and the rest without pay.
She has already taken more than 10 days off since the year started.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s January 20. She has taken 10 days off this year already? There have been less than 15 working days since January 1. It may be time to move onto a new childcare situation.
Her mom was sick and I told her to go be with her. My parents were visiting and helping with the kids and yeah we have been scrambling and work has been suffering. Wanted her to be with her mom these past weeks.
Anonymous wrote:It’s January 20. She has taken 10 days off this year already? There have been less than 15 working days since January 1. It may be time to move onto a new childcare situation.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here. She spent the last week with her family. I understand wanting to take her to her home country and perhaps have a funeral there, but I don’t understand why she needs to be there for a month. By contract she has the to 10 days off, but she routinely takes a lot more. We are not around so I don’t care. However, we ARE around now. DH will be traveling and in such short notice (2 weeks) I don’t think I will be able to find much of a replacement.
Either way, I said she can go… but I don’t want to pay her for those weeks she is out. Is it mean of me?
Pay her for what she has left from the 10 days, unpaid leave for the rest. Easy.
+1
This is a no brainer. Same as any of us would need to take LWOP if we ran out of time. And we'd only hope not to be replaced. You are being very kind.
Anonymous wrote:If your children are school aged then ask your schools’ aftercare provider if they can accommodate for that time. It’s far cheaper than a nanny. Then, if financials are truly still a concern, perhaps tell her you can only pay for part of the leave or suggest an advance on vacation time. Honestly, if you can afford to be away for weeks and months at a time as a family of five then be prepared that financial excuses will sound cold hearted to your nanny.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here. She spent the last week with her family. I understand wanting to take her to her home country and perhaps have a funeral there, but I don’t understand why she needs to be there for a month. By contract she has the to 10 days off, but she routinely takes a lot more. We are not around so I don’t care. However, we ARE around now. DH will be traveling and in such short notice (2 weeks) I don’t think I will be able to find much of a replacement.
Either way, I said she can go… but I don’t want to pay her for those weeks she is out. Is it mean of me?
Pay her for what she has left from the 10 days, unpaid leave for the rest. Easy.