Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would be fun to list all the assets and immediately transfer them once he is accepted.
But they probably have a clause preventing this.
I would talk to an elder law lawyer

Yes they do. Control is no longer entirely in hands of resident.
Medicaid has look back period too.

I am sure the lawyers have cooked up something as a back door for this!

Never discount the importance of sitting down and asking. Ask the why this, or why that. Make a personal connection. The staff are just people. Like you, they have families, they have loved ones. They have a history with the elderly, both professional and personal.

Also, since you are no longer working they need to know your assets (it is all you have).

I think they all do this. They need to be sure you can pay through the end of life. Better to ensure this upfront rather than kicking out ill elderly people.

I think this is totally normal. We did this for my mom in Virginia -- for a non-profit CCRC, by the way, so it's complete paranoia IMO to say they want this information so they can drain your accounts. No way. They want this information so they can make reasonable financial and actuarial projections about whether your parent will be able to continue to pay their bills for the time that they are projected to live. And like the immediate PP, my mom's CCRC also has a charitable foundation to kick in if someone runs out of money, but that's not a bottomless well of financial assistance.

It's also reasonable for them to ask for physical/medical information as well. My mom had to get a physical and take a cognitive test as well before moving into her CCRC, again because the CCRC wants to make reasonable projections about whether the new resident will be safe in independent living and how long actuarially it might be before the person might need assisted living or memory care.

FWIW, my mom was resistant to moving to a CCRC -- we got the ball rolling in the summer of 2022, and she had been isolated for two years during the pandemic and was well-settled where she'd been living for 30+ years.

OMG -- she loves it so, so, so much. It's given her a new lease on life. She has a huge social circle now, and has a serious boyfriend for the first time since she and my dad got divorced nearly 30 years ago. She's unbelievably happy, and the place is amazing -- great staff and great services. I only wish we'd been able to get here there years ago after she retired, but she's living her best life now and is happier than she's ever been in her life.

Don't delay applying because of financial disclosure requirements.

We're in IL -- our place had fairly detailed medical and financial forms, but they are a nonprofit with a charitable fund that kicks in if you run out of assets so they need to make sure that doesn't happen too quickly.

Anonymous wrote:Would be fun to list all the assets and immediately transfer them once he is accepted.
But they probably have a clause preventing this.
I would talk to an elder law lawyer

Yes they do. Control is no longer entirely in hands of resident.
Medicaid has look back period too.

Would be fun to list all the assets and immediately transfer them once he is accepted.
But they probably have a clause preventing this.
I would talk to an elder law lawyer

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just to give us more context Op, is it a Continuing Care Community (CCR)?

The places we’ve talked to offer senior living and assisted living, so different levels, starting with some meals, housecleaning and transportation but offering medical care and other services as needed. I don’t know if that’s a CCR.

Right now, he’s living independently and doesn’t need assisted care. We’re more concerned about housekeeping and getting him to stop driving.

You need to understand what your dad is paying for.

That’s not normal for assisted living and we did not have to provide that info in Maryland.

For a continuing care arrangement, maybe. For those, the company wants to make sure they can make money off you.

Anonymous wrote:This is typical. They want ti make sure that he can afford to stay there. No one wants to evict a senior citizen.

This - we're going through the process now. If the retirement community offers dementia services, it REALLY wants to clear the people applying in advance. They are expensive. They don't want to toss someone out. They REALLY don't want someone with a dementia problem so the health forms are even more intrusive (and you have to hand over doctors' files).

Op if 5 years is the threshold maybe your dad should give you some money. He doesn’t need to go right this moment