Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Just wanted to provide an update..

I reached out to my closest Chabad synagogue and asked about Hebrew School. The Rabbi said any child can participate in the school. He then asked if my child has any experience with Hebrew and I said no

He said he'd need to speak with his wife, who I assume is a teacher at the school, and ask her if my child would be okay to join mid-year. His concern was that coming in with no knowledge could be detrimental to my child and just throw off the rhythm of the other children.

I said I understand, I look forward to hearing from you soon.

That was three days ago so I don't think we'll be trying to get involved there any further.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but my understanding was that it would be a quick and simple question to ask and then he'd let me know.

I obviously explained that I am not Jewish, and then he said they wouldn't be able to perform any Jewish rituals because they don't believe my children are Jewish - okay, fine.

But I feel like I'm being given the cold shoulder here? I feel like it shouldn't take days to just simply get back with me?

I don't think I'm even going to follow up if I don't hear anything. You get vibes from people and I don't think they're interested in non-Jews getting involved.

Oh well. Now I know!

I'm so sorry this happened to you, OP. It was considerate of you to be honest about your/your kids' halachic status and the rabbi could have done you the courtesy of being up front in return.

I didn't mention my interest in conversion, however, I think I may have said I was taking an introductory class. We actually attended a different Chabad's public menorah lighting a few weeks ago. And I also attended an online zoom discussion that was about the war and the t3rror attacks leading up to it.

I don't want people to think that my idea was to just dump my kids and run. Quite the contrary! I want to get involved so that I can learn more.

I understand that Chabad is Orthodox, however, I was hoping that as my husband (who is Jewish but secular) and I would be joining events together that they would be, shall I say, a little more curious to indulge me? Ha.

Like I said, no big deal, you don't know until you ask and start feeling places out.

I think you should have discussed your family's intention to become fully Jewish. That's really what makes the difference, because so many interfaith families are looking for something they call "exposure" for their kids without intending for them to convert and join the Jewish community exclusively. I think you might have received a very different response had you discussed it this way. If you're intending to convert, you're only a non-Jew temporarily.

I am aware of converts within the Chabad movement as well as one person whose conversion was supervised by a Chabad rabbi. They wouldn't rule out helping you. You just didn't convince this rabbi that you are in earnest.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Just wanted to provide an update..

I reached out to my closest Chabad synagogue and asked about Hebrew School. The Rabbi said any child can participate in the school. He then asked if my child has any experience with Hebrew and I said no

He said he'd need to speak with his wife, who I assume is a teacher at the school, and ask her if my child would be okay to join mid-year. His concern was that coming in with no knowledge could be detrimental to my child and just throw off the rhythm of the other children.

I said I understand, I look forward to hearing from you soon.

That was three days ago so I don't think we'll be trying to get involved there any further.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but my understanding was that it would be a quick and simple question to ask and then he'd let me know.

I obviously explained that I am not Jewish, and then he said they wouldn't be able to perform any Jewish rituals because they don't believe my children are Jewish - okay, fine.

But I feel like I'm being given the cold shoulder here? I feel like it shouldn't take days to just simply get back with me?

I don't think I'm even going to follow up if I don't hear anything. You get vibes from people and I don't think they're interested in non-Jews getting involved.

Oh well. Now I know!

I'm so sorry this happened to you, OP. It was considerate of you to be honest about your/your kids' halachic status and the rabbi could have done you the courtesy of being up front in return.

I didn't mention my interest in conversion, however, I think I may have said I was taking an introductory class. We actually attended a different Chabad's public menorah lighting a few weeks ago. And I also attended an online zoom discussion that was about the war and the t3rror attacks leading up to it.

I don't want people to think that my idea was to just dump my kids and run. Quite the contrary! I want to get involved so that I can learn more.

I understand that Chabad is Orthodox, however, I was hoping that as my husband (who is Jewish but secular) and I would be joining events together that they would be, shall I say, a little more curious to indulge me? Ha.

Like I said, no big deal, you don't know until you ask and start feeling places out.

OP here.. forgot to include the words "Chabad houses"

So should read:

"I have heard so many stories of people saying their local (across the US) Chabad houses being welcoming."

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Just wanted to provide an update..

I reached out to my closest Chabad synagogue and asked about Hebrew School. The Rabbi said any child can participate in the school. He then asked if my child has any experience with Hebrew and I said no

He said he'd need to speak with his wife, who I assume is a teacher at the school, and ask her if my child would be okay to join mid-year. His concern was that coming in with no knowledge could be detrimental to my child and just throw off the rhythm of the other children.

I said I understand, I look forward to hearing from you soon.

That was three days ago so I don't think we'll be trying to get involved there any further.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but my understanding was that it would be a quick and simple question to ask and then he'd let me know.

I obviously explained that I am not Jewish, and then he said they wouldn't be able to perform any Jewish rituals because they don't believe my children are Jewish - okay, fine.

But I feel like I'm being given the cold shoulder here? I feel like it shouldn't take days to just simply get back with me?

I don't think I'm even going to follow up if I don't hear anything. You get vibes from people and I don't think they're interested in non-Jews getting involved.

Oh well. Now I know!

You had suggested to us that you were interested in conversion. Approaching as someone who wants to be part of the community is different than declaring you are outside the community but hoping to drop in as a tourist?

Yes, I am interested in finding a synagogue who provides sponsorship for conversion.

I never brought up my interest in conversion to the Chabad Rabbi as I know they don't get involved with conversions.

I was hoping, though, that my children, even as patrilineal Jews, would be welcomed. I have heard so many stories of people saying their local (across the US) being welcoming.

However, I know they are basically run independently so not every place operates the same or has the same level of openness.

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Just wanted to provide an update..

I reached out to my closest Chabad synagogue and asked about Hebrew School. The Rabbi said any child can participate in the school. He then asked if my child has any experience with Hebrew and I said no

He said he'd need to speak with his wife, who I assume is a teacher at the school, and ask her if my child would be okay to join mid-year. His concern was that coming in with no knowledge could be detrimental to my child and just throw off the rhythm of the other children.

I said I understand, I look forward to hearing from you soon.

That was three days ago so I don't think we'll be trying to get involved there any further.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but my understanding was that it would be a quick and simple question to ask and then he'd let me know.

I obviously explained that I am not Jewish, and then he said they wouldn't be able to perform any Jewish rituals because they don't believe my children are Jewish - okay, fine.

But I feel like I'm being given the cold shoulder here? I feel like it shouldn't take days to just simply get back with me?

I don't think I'm even going to follow up if I don't hear anything. You get vibes from people and I don't think they're interested in non-Jews getting involved.

Oh well. Now I know!

I'm so sorry this happened to you, OP. It was considerate of you to be honest about your/your kids' halachic status and the rabbi could have done you the courtesy of being up front in return.

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Just wanted to provide an update..

I reached out to my closest Chabad synagogue and asked about Hebrew School. The Rabbi said any child can participate in the school. He then asked if my child has any experience with Hebrew and I said no

He said he'd need to speak with his wife, who I assume is a teacher at the school, and ask her if my child would be okay to join mid-year. His concern was that coming in with no knowledge could be detrimental to my child and just throw off the rhythm of the other children.

I said I understand, I look forward to hearing from you soon.

That was three days ago so I don't think we'll be trying to get involved there any further.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but my understanding was that it would be a quick and simple question to ask and then he'd let me know.

I obviously explained that I am not Jewish, and then he said they wouldn't be able to perform any Jewish rituals because they don't believe my children are Jewish - okay, fine.

But I feel like I'm being given the cold shoulder here? I feel like it shouldn't take days to just simply get back with me?

I don't think I'm even going to follow up if I don't hear anything. You get vibes from people and I don't think they're interested in non-Jews getting involved.

Oh well. Now I know!

You had suggested to us that you were interested in conversion. Approaching as someone who wants to be part of the community is different than declaring you are outside the community but hoping to drop in as a tourist?

OP here.

Just wanted to provide an update..

I reached out to my closest Chabad synagogue and asked about Hebrew School. The Rabbi said any child can participate in the school. He then asked if my child has any experience with Hebrew and I said no

He said he'd need to speak with his wife, who I assume is a teacher at the school, and ask her if my child would be okay to join mid-year. His concern was that coming in with no knowledge could be detrimental to my child and just throw off the rhythm of the other children.

I said I understand, I look forward to hearing from you soon.

That was three days ago so I don't think we'll be trying to get involved there any further.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but my understanding was that it would be a quick and simple question to ask and then he'd let me know.

I obviously explained that I am not Jewish, and then he said they wouldn't be able to perform any Jewish rituals because they don't believe my children are Jewish - okay, fine.

But I feel like I'm being given the cold shoulder here? I feel like it shouldn't take days to just simply get back with me?

I don't think I'm even going to follow up if I don't hear anything. You get vibes from people and I don't think they're interested in non-Jews getting involved.

Oh well. Now I know!

Anonymous wrote:If you are really interested in conversion for yourself and your child, Chabad can certainly guide you if you all feel like it is a good fit.

I think Chabad is a great organization for their efforts to just try to get Jewish people to observe a little more than they would on their own. They're also great at building community in a way that centers a Jewish worldview, because that has kind of fallen off the radar for assimilated Jews, especially unafilliated ones.

If that sounds like a community you'd like to be part of, OP, go talk to them and see what you think. Your eventual conversion would place you in a much more central position in the larger Jewish world than a Reform conversion would.

This last statement is a little misleading. I converted in the Reform Movement and I'm welcomed as Jewish everywhere except Orthodox spaces (and even then, usually only for ritual purposes and my kids' halachic status). Since I have no interest in living an Orthodox life and mostly wouldn't be eligible as a woman to do ritual things anyway, this is not an issue for me. The Conservative Movement has always accepted my Reform conversion and I'm an active member of my Conservative synagogue in Maryland.

OP, by all means, check out Chabad and see what you think. They're very welcoming and my coworkers parents do things with the Gainesville Chabad when they don't want to trek to more central Jewish life in Fairfax and have been happy with it. Just know that if you decide to convert through Chabad, you'll need to become Orthodox in your daily life. When I looked into converting Orthodox (I ultimately didn't), my husband (also born Jewish, like yours) and I would have had to become fully shomer shabbos and shomer negiah. He would have also been expected to attend daily minyan to show his support for my conversion and demonstrate that we were living an Orthodox Jewish life. If you AND your husband aren't on board with Orthodoxy, you won't be able to convert. You can still attend Chabad's programs and services, though. And maybe Orthodox life will really speak to your family. Who knows!

I am in a different state so I can’t offer any specific recommendations. I have been to events at our local Chabad and they are very warm and welcoming. However, I know that I would not be comfortable at a service there. I was raised Conservative and now belong to a Reform temple. I prefer services that are egalitarian.

You may not have a lot of options in your location but generally Reform synagogues are very accepting of non-Jewish spouses. My own congregation has many interfaith families. Some spouses have converted but others have not yet have become very active in the synagogue and they are valued. Even the conservative synagogue near me is very tolerant. These are today’s families and synagogues need anyone who wants to belong.

Many of my friends go to Chabad for events but belong to our temple for services (tbh, mainly high holidays) and religious school for kids.

If you are really interested in conversion for yourself and your child, Chabad can certainly guide you if you all feel like it is a good fit.

I think Chabad is a great organization for their efforts to just try to get Jewish people to observe a little more than they would on their own. They're also great at building community in a way that centers a Jewish worldview, because that has kind of fallen off the radar for assimilated Jews, especially unafilliated ones.

If that sounds like a community you'd like to be part of, OP, go talk to them and see what you think. Your eventual conversion would place you in a much more central position in the larger Jewish world than a Reform conversion would.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Chabad and Reform are very different, a weird choice as your top/only 2.

PP here + I noticed that too which is why I thought OP might be interested in Reconstructionism - she’s obviously still learning about denominations (and that’s 100% OK!)

OP, you might enjoy this link:
https://www.jewbelong.com/more/different-kinds-jewish/

OP here.

Thanks for the article! It was an interesting read!

I'm just excited to dive in and get involved - wherever that may lead me!

You are very welcome. There’s a lot of good resources on that site for those of us who are “Jew-ish” as they say. I love how excited you are. Welcome ❤️🕎

OP here.

Thank you!

I am taking an introduction class that started in early November. I watch videos on YouTube, read articles, and I recently received a Tanakh - which is neat because I've never owned even a Christian Bible before.

I started reading it on the first night of Hanukkah this year, funnily enough!

If you have nerdy tendencies, there’s a wonderful book called “These Are The Words: a vocabulary of Jewish spiritual life” by Arthur Green. It’s a sort of expanded glossary, and goes into the roots and context of many terms. I really enjoy flipping through it. You might find it a fun addition to your studies!

OP here.

Cool, I will check it out! I love doing research (in probably weird in that regard), but I'm just soaking up as much as I can!

The Rebbetzin I'm taking the class with, sometimes isn't the most organized. The very first class I asked a question about which term to describe G-d should people use. I understand there are different meanings and contexts but it still isn't 100% clear yo me, so having another resource like the one you mentioned is always appreciated!

I also love watching Tovia on YouTube. Took me a bit of time to like him (sounds odd) but he is such a wealth of knowledge.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Chabad and Reform are very different, a weird choice as your top/only 2.

PP here + I noticed that too which is why I thought OP might be interested in Reconstructionism - she’s obviously still learning about denominations (and that’s 100% OK!)

OP, you might enjoy this link:
https://www.jewbelong.com/more/different-kinds-jewish/

OP here.

Thanks for the article! It was an interesting read!

I'm just excited to dive in and get involved - wherever that may lead me!

You are very welcome. There’s a lot of good resources on that site for those of us who are “Jew-ish” as they say. I love how excited you are. Welcome ❤️🕎

OP here.

Thank you!

I am taking an introduction class that started in early November. I watch videos on YouTube, read articles, and I recently received a Tanakh - which is neat because I've never owned even a Christian Bible before.

I started reading it on the first night of Hanukkah this year, funnily enough!

If you have nerdy tendencies, there’s a wonderful book called “These Are The Words: a vocabulary of Jewish spiritual life” by Arthur Green. It’s a sort of expanded glossary, and goes into the roots and context of many terms. I really enjoy flipping through it. You might find it a fun addition to your studies!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Chabad and Reform are very different, a weird choice as your top/only 2.

PP here + I noticed that too which is why I thought OP might be interested in Reconstructionism - she’s obviously still learning about denominations (and that’s 100% OK!)

OP, you might enjoy this link:
https://www.jewbelong.com/more/different-kinds-jewish/

OP here.

Thanks for the article! It was an interesting read!

I'm just excited to dive in and get involved - wherever that may lead me!

You are very welcome. There’s a lot of good resources on that site for those of us who are “Jew-ish” as they say. I love how excited you are. Welcome ❤️🕎

OP here.

Thank you!

I am taking an introduction class that started in early November. I watch videos on YouTube, read articles, and I recently received a Tanakh - which is neat because I've never owned even a Christian Bible before.

I started reading it on the first night of Hanukkah this year, funnily enough!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Chabad and Reform are very different, a weird choice as your top/only 2.

PP here + I noticed that too which is why I thought OP might be interested in Reconstructionism - she’s obviously still learning about denominations (and that’s 100% OK!)

OP, you might enjoy this link:
https://www.jewbelong.com/more/different-kinds-jewish/

OP here.

Thanks for the article! It was an interesting read!

I'm just excited to dive in and get involved - wherever that may lead me!

You are very welcome. There’s a lot of good resources on that site for those of us who are “Jew-ish” as they say. I love how excited you are. Welcome ❤️🕎

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Chabad and Reform are very different, a weird choice as your top/only 2.

PP here + I noticed that too which is why I thought OP might be interested in Reconstructionism - she’s obviously still learning about denominations (and that’s 100% OK!)

OP, you might enjoy this link:
https://www.jewbelong.com/more/different-kinds-jewish/

OP here.

Thanks for the article! It was an interesting read!

I'm just excited to dive in and get involved - wherever that may lead me!