Icky family

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To add, my mother also had a stroke and has been in recovery since last summer. This chick could have at least been more sympathetic and let any bygones be bygones if she actually was looked at. My mother denies it and said she hasn't looked over this girl or been mean to her. I believe my mom.

You mean she didn’t do the look over that she does to almost everyone she meets? So GF is a lucky one who your mom claims got skipped over? I think you must be a troll and not a good one. It’s hard to imagine someone could be so self absorbed as to believe they have any say in a sibling’s relationship.

NP here. Then you would be absolut ely shocked at the way SIL behaved when DH and I married. So many rapid fire intrusive questions, so much judgment, yet not a reciprocal relationship - because SIL thinks other women are as judgy as SIL is.

OP, this is DCUM, not Jerry Springer show!

Tell your mother she's going to have to work at being more welcoming if she wants them around.

If you want to appear credible:
1. Identify yourself as the OP every time you post.
2. Stop calling your brother's significant other, and the mother of his child, a "chick". It's disrespectful.
3. Accept that you cannot control your brother, and that you might never, ever like the humans he associates with.
4. Feel free to vent here. But please stay courteous face-to-face with your brother's girlfriend. If she wants to be unreasonable, that's her prerogative. You will not respond in kind.

Anonymous wrote:My brother's girlfriend whom he has a baby with (they got together months after he divorced my ex sis in law) told brother she didn't like how my mom looked her over and didn't want to spend thanksgiving together as planned. So I spent thanksgiving with my mom and brother went to spend it with his fiance and her family. I don't like how he lets himself be controlled by the women he's with. He lets them run the show. I am the sister btw. But I don't know how to tell him to let her know to be less sensitive. She talks to my mom when she's over but never mentioned that she was so bothered about the look over which my mom does to almost everyone she meets.

I’m glad you don’t know how to tell him because you absolutely shouldn’t say anything! She’s the mother of your niece. I would focus on being an aunt and building a relationship with my niece with the understanding that any drama I’m involved in will affect that relationship. Stay out of it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To add, my mother also had a stroke and has been in recovery since last summer. This chick could have at least been more sympathetic and let any bygones be bygones if she actually was looked at. My mother denies it and said she hasn't looked over this girl or been mean to her. I believe my mom.

You mean she didn’t do the look over that she does to almost everyone she meets? So GF is a lucky one who your mom claims got skipped over? I think you must be a troll and not a good one. It’s hard to imagine someone could be so self absorbed as to believe they have any say in a sibling’s relationship.

The fiance is saying it's just being looked over again and again but from what I've seen I have seen no look overs if there was one and I am always there since I'm taking care of my mom since her stroke. Why are y'all so mean and rude? calling people troll and being accusatory? Got damn!

Got damn?

Got Milk?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To add, my mother also had a stroke and has been in recovery since last summer. This chick could have at least been more sympathetic and let any bygones be bygones if she actually was looked at. My mother denies it and said she hasn't looked over this girl or been mean to her. I believe my mom.

You mean she didn’t do the look over that she does to almost everyone she meets? So GF is a lucky one who your mom claims got skipped over? I think you must be a troll and not a good one. It’s hard to imagine someone could be so self absorbed as to believe they have any say in a sibling’s relationship.

The fiance is saying it's just being looked over again and again but from what I've seen I have seen no look overs if there was one and I am always there since I'm taking care of my mom since her stroke. Why are y'all so mean and rude? calling people troll and being accusatory? Got damn!

Got damn?

So how did you find out why the gf didn't want to share Tday with you and mom? Guessing your brother told you.

And you believe that he's controlled by the women he's with?

And you need to tell him to tell her to be less sensitive?

Your mother looks over everyone she meets?

Mom having a stroke last year should dictate how the gf acts?

And you're talking about brother's high school sweetheart/first wife as if she has a role in all this?

Sounds like you've the one creating all the drama. You're really grasping here over one incident in which your brother threw his gf under the bus rather so you'd be mad at her and not him.

Carry on....

Op, put yourself in her shoes. She knows you like his ex wife better and think she is controlling. She knows your mom gives her mean looks. Why would she want to spend time with you two? She has good boundaries, she does not need to expose herself to people who resent her. You could become genuinely nice to her so you can be included in their lives, and then try to be a bridge between her and your mom. Or you can just keep resenting her but don’t expect your brother to force his wife to deal with that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To add, my mother also had a stroke and has been in recovery since last summer. This chick could have at least been more sympathetic and let any bygones be bygones if she actually was looked at. My mother denies it and said she hasn't looked over this girl or been mean to her. I believe my mom.

You mean she didn’t do the look over that she does to almost everyone she meets? So GF is a lucky one who your mom claims got skipped over? I think you must be a troll and not a good one. It’s hard to imagine someone could be so self absorbed as to believe they have any say in a sibling’s relationship.

+1

If your mom “looks over” everyone she meets, she’s incredibly rude.

So you want to control your brother by telling him to tell his fiancee not to be so sensitive and controlling? Got it, crazytown.

It’s not news that women take the lead on the social family dynamics. When they don’t like each other, there’s no getting together. Husbands and boyfriends just follow their lead.

You and your mom sound judgmental and perhaps miserable. Good for them to keep positive vibes only.

Having a child outside of marriage is trashy. Perhaps on some level she realizes this?