Anonymous wrote:Entering the territory of makeup and body scrubs, etc.. which I as a parent will always provide for hygienic items but for fancier items that are more costly like certain brands of lip glosses, eye lashes, mascara, body scrubs, lotions, body sprays, what is reasonable for a teen to pay for?

I usually pay. My kid has no time for a job (even though she wants one) between school, mountains of HW, sport + recruiting events, and volunteering. She had done some "free" work in support of what she wants to do (she thinks, this is why she's doing it). So she's more than earned me footing the bill for this stuff (within reason).

Toothpaste, soap, shampoo until they can take over at about 12-13 with their allowance.

I pay for needs not wants. So - toothpaste, deodorant, soap and shampoo/conditioner. Same with clothes. Everything else is on them.

I will pay for needs, not wants. So skincare, yes. Anything for zits, yes. Body spray? No.* And wait for your kid to claim they "need" makeup for their "mental health" and to "feel good about themselves." They can babysit or get a job for their mental health.

*We actually don't allow cologne, perfume, or body sprays regardless of who buys them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I pay for what is age appropriate available at Target.
If she decided that she need the Sephora items - this comes out of babysitting/birthday etc money

+1

Same here. Although there's a limit to what I'll do at Target. I'll buy the face wash she wants, but not a bunch of different masks or makeup, unless we're shopping together. That's a trick I learned from my own parents. Keep the allowance low enough so that they are excited to go shopping with you (and then you get to spend time with them).

Anonymous wrote:I might buy my tween an occasional treat, but in my view that's what her allowance, birthday, and Christmases are for. Especially since they seem to feel entitled to high-end products at a young age.

+1! When my 13YO DD asks for something higher priced than I think is necessary for her age, I tell her she can pay for it. Usually she puts it back, which tells me she didn’t truly value the price for it. Occasionally, she will decide it’s worth it.

Anonymous wrote:I might buy my tween an occasional treat, but in my view that's what her allowance, birthday, and Christmases are for. Especially since they seem to feel entitled to high-end products at a young age.

yup. thanks to social media my teen is always wanting the next makeup/skincare/body thing. She gets an allowance and pays for that out of pocket. I buy most other things. She will occasionally take friends out to movies with her money - but now that she's a bit older teen, she is careful about wasting her money.

Anonymous wrote:Entering the territory of makeup and body scrubs, etc.. which I as a parent will always provide for hygienic items but for fancier items that are more costly like certain brands of lip glosses, eye lashes, mascara, body scrubs, lotions, body sprays, what is reasonable for a teen to pay for?

Once my kids were old enough to have jobs we had a conversation about needs and wants.

I told them I would continue to pay for their needs. They were responsible for their wants. Sometimes they confuse needs with wants. So we had to define some of that:

— social outings
— takeaway food on their own (including Starbucks trips etc)
— Clothing beyond basics for school
— gaming stuff
— impulse Amazon purchases (music, video games etc)

Makeup/perfume and beauty products etc are in the “want” column even if they think they “need” it.

Even toiletries beyond the basics are in the want column.

Anonymous wrote:Growing up my parents provided basic shampoo/conditioner, deodorant, razors and soap. Literally anything else (scented lotion, face wash, more expensive hair products) came out of my allowance/babysitting money. High-end bath/skincare products make excellent Christmas/birthday gifts and you are spoiling your child if you just buy her these as maintenance products.

+1. And I can spot the spoiled teens a mile away by their behavior. They are so clueless and out of touch. The stuff that comes out of their mouths! It’s not a good look and is setting them up for a life of disappointment unless the parents want to subsidize for life.

Anonymous wrote:Growing up my parents provided basic shampoo/conditioner, deodorant, razors and soap. Literally anything else (scented lotion, face wash, more expensive hair products) came out of my allowance/babysitting money. High-end bath/skincare products make excellent Christmas/birthday gifts and you are spoiling your child if you just buy her these as maintenance products.

Agree. I buy basics from drug store. Everything that is luxury and/ or unnecessary they can buy with own money. Thankfully my teen isn’t in to this

We've told our teen that for now we only want her using clean makeup, which sometimes means it costs more. I'll split the cost 50-50 with her since I know she would otherwise go with basic drugstore brands at this point. She isn't insistent on high end brands, but if she was that would come out of her own pocket or be a birthday gift.

Basic hygiene products are of course a household purchase. We don't skimp on soaps and body washes and razors and shampoos.

Anonymous wrote:I pay for what is age appropriate available at Target.
If she decided that she need the Sephora items - this comes out of babysitting/birthday etc money

I think this is a good line. But you also should provide an allowance, so she has some discretionary money to spend.

Anonymous wrote:I pay for what is age appropriate available at Target.
If she decided that she need the Sephora items - this comes out of babysitting/birthday etc money

This.

I'll buy a different shampoo than what I used to pick out when they were younger. But not an $80 bottle. I'll buy a reasonable face wash/lotion/body scrub, but if they want something expensive, that's on them (or they'll get it as a gift for a birthday, Christmas, whatever).

Anonymous wrote:Growing up my parents provided basic shampoo/conditioner, deodorant, razors and soap. Literally anything else (scented lotion, face wash, more expensive hair products) came out of my allowance/babysitting money. High-end bath/skincare products make excellent Christmas/birthday gifts and you are spoiling your child if you just buy her these as maintenance products.

This. Parents cover the essentials. Beauty products come from personal funds or gifts.

We paid for what worked and was reasonably priced. I didn't want them fighting with acne if paying more for a more suitable product helped. Same with their hair. The shampoo and conditioner that was good for one left the other kid's hair like straw. We also covered body wash, deodorant, toothpaste and Listerine.

They paid for make up, lotion if they didn't like mine, perfume/body spray (not axe), and anything else above basic hygiene.

Thankfully the eyelash/brow thing wasn't happening then. We would not have paid for those or hair extensions.