Anonymous wrote:Sounds like my family. Parents and grandparents trained us at a young age we need to take care of them at all times and our needs don't matter.

Not everyone grows up in a functional home OP.

OP here.
I noticed the bizarre competitive behaviour among DH and his siblings started after their elderly father died.
Before he died DH's sisters already naturally gravitated towards their mother but after he died it developed into some kind of competition, with one sister profiling herself as the perfect 'golden child'.

Sounds like my family. Parents and grandparents trained us at a young age we need to take care of them at all times and our needs don't matter.

Not everyone grows up in a functional home OP.

The parent might be a narcissist or have borderline personality disorder with a golden child. If that’s the case, they create this dynamic.

I refuse to participate and got the parent on psych medications. That helped but the parent still tries to start problems between siblings so they can remain the center.

Anonymous wrote:My 55 year old sister is still traumatized by “mom loves you more than me” …….. she will never, ever get over it.

Is there any truth in what your sister is saying? Why would she think this?

Anonymous wrote:I’m one of seven and there is no sibling rivalry and we are all in our 60’s and 70’s. Yes, there was when we were kids but not now. We’ve all done well and we are just happy to be healthy and enjoying life. Our parents are deceased and no one tried to influence their estate planning.

np thank your lucky stars you were born into a functioning family. You won the jackpot! And I am sincere. I did not but, I consider myself a work in progress on that regard.

To the op


If I were you I would just smile and ignore. It isn't your immediate family and should be easy to do!