So confidence and activity are not related. Just because a kid is active does not mean they may not have social anxiety like my top club travel U12 kid. And just because someone like my son who is a total nerd who loves chess and does participate in XC because it's a school requirement does not mean he has no confidence.

Now sporty is different than activity too. I don't really think it matters when really young. You need to give it to MS at least to see how it shakes up.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get rid of the electronics.

I have a kid who doesn't choose physical activity. In our case, electronics isn't the problem.

Electronics is never the problem. But it exacerbates the problem. PPs' advice to remove or limit electronics is on target.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you had an OT or PT evaluation?

This, OP. My child was like this and I learned he has low tone (hypotonia). There are lots of things that could be going on that look like a child that doesn’t want to be active or a child that’s lazy. Please look into it for your child’s sake. Lots of these things are easy to work with and he could have a much more active life.

I could have written this post too about my child. PT made a world of difference. Due to extra stretchy ligaments his joints weren’t held
properly causing his muscles
to work harder which was tiring. A walk to him was like running a marathon for me (not actually but you get the idea). After 5 years of PT he now swims for core strength, plays tennis, and hikes and backpacks with scouts.

I think sometimes people get these very specific ideals in their head regarding how kids are "supposed" to be and really struggle with the wide variety of normal, healthy behavior.

There's a big difference between being sporty and being active. I'm not very sporty. I'm also not that outdoorsy. But I'm very active -- I do yoga or bar 5 days a week, I walk almost everywhere, I lift weights. I like physical exercise but playing basketball or going for a run both sound like torture to me.

My kid is pretty similar. She likes ballet, yoga, and going for walks or riding on her scooter. She has more energy than I do generally so she runs around more, but when they did a basketball program at her school, she went for one tortuous week and then asked not to go back and we said okay. Exercise need not be torture.

Both DD and I are a healthy weight, eat healthy foods, sleep well and have well regulated moods. Somehow, despite playing no organized sports, we're both healthy and active.

There's not just one way, and a person isn't "lazy" just because they don't enjoy playing basketball or going running.

My nephew hates anything physical. He’s very into piano and choir though. Does your kid like participating in anything? Are you worried about their physical health? Or that they’re not engaged in anything at all?

Does he like running around at a playground?

Anonymous wrote:Have you had an OT or PT evaluation?

This, OP. My child was like this and I learned he has low tone (hypotonia). There are lots of things that could be going on that look like a child that doesn’t want to be active or a child that’s lazy. Please look into it for your child’s sake. Lots of these things are easy to work with and he could have a much more active life.

Anonymous wrote:Get rid of the electronics.

I have a kid who doesn't choose physical activity. In our case, electronics isn't the problem. I am pretty restrictive about screen time, because a sibling needs that restriction, but she doesn't usually use what's offered. When she has free time, she chooses to make music, or draw, or read a book. If I kick her outside, she'll take a book and climb into our treehouse and read, or a sketch pad and draw plants, or whatever.

Meanwhile, her siblings are jumping on the trampoline, and shooting hoops, and riding their bikes and scooters around the neighborhood.

Find something he wants to do, even if its just a bike or scooter or a cool playground.

Anonymous wrote:My son is young and refuses to be active, play sports or run at all at school and organized activities. What can I do to build his confidence?

How young? Do you make it fun?

Do you lead by example?

Anonymous wrote:Get rid of the electronics.

+1

Definitely start here.

Anonymous wrote:My son is young and refuses to be active, play sports or run at all at school and organized activities. What can I do to build his confidence?

Model regular activity as a family (hiking, playing, etc.). Build gentle activity into your days eg. A walk through the park after dinner. Make activity fun by playing things like the floor is lava, building obstacle courses,

Also understand that confidence and activity don’t have to be intertwined. Is he confident in other contexts? Support those. Not everyone is destined to be the quarterback, and it’s okay.

How active as a family are you? Bike together? Walks after dinner? Hikes together? I think you can’t expect kids to be active unless you are too.

Get rid of the electronics.