Either daughter breaks her lease and finds a rental that allows pit mixes (usually there are breed restrictions), or the dog is humanely euthanized.

If you really, really want to try to make it work, you need to find a veterinary behaviorist as well as a trainer specializing in aggression to evaluate the dog and determine if there is a plan forward. This will cost many thousands of dollars, so it’s probably cheaper to break the lease and find alternative housing. In the end you could pay the thousands and be told the dog is not able to be rehabbed.

I’m sorry, OP.

If you bring that dog into your house you will have to “crate and rotate”, alternating which dog is loose vs crated behind closed doors. The aggressive dog will need to be muzzled any time he is not actively eating. Management usually fails at some point though, so you need to be okay with your dog getting attacked before you bring this dog home…which any sane person would not be okay with.

First, I'm so sorry for your daughter for her loss. And you, even though he was your ex, my condolences if it brings some residual conflicted feelings for you.

How old is she? If she's 23 she may need a bit more counsel and support than if she's 33. Either way, it is not your job to fix this by bringing a dog with a history of aggression into your home. You can offer to help find resources, like some of the rescue organizations others have referenced, but you should not and cannot offer to take on the burden of a dangerous dog.

Can we stop belittling the poor dog just because it belonged to the ex?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here again. I want to believe she’s too old to be attacking other dogs.

Yet you said she went for your dog when it was 2.5? So this is 6 months later? And you say it’s your daughter’s decision, not yours?

I’m having a hard time believing this isn’t a post to get people riled up about pit mix dogs.

No, I said that was when I got him 2.5 years ago.

You can believe what you want.

I believe you should let your daughter handle this and place the health and well-being of both you and your dog before your ex’s dog, OP.

Op it's unusual but if you explain the situation, could you get a vet to remove her teeth? Ask your vet about this.

I can see the fix you're in, but if DD doesn't want the dog put down, she's going to need to figure it out without counting on you to take the dog in. Is your DD settling her father's estate? I would leave it entirely on her, and don't let her suck you into making this decision. If you decide to have the dog put down, she will never forgive you. That is why I say to leave the decision entirely on her. Perhaps she can explain the situation to her leasing office and see if they're willing to break the lease. Even so, she's going to have her hands full with the dog. But it's entirely her decision, based on your post.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Describe the aggression.

My dog is aggressive with larger dogs, not smaller or same sized dogs. I've been able to foster a multitude of dogs, all smaller than he is.

She’s bitten dogs at the vet, and now has to be muzzled. She’s killed small animals in the yard. I tried to introduce her to my dog when I got him 2.5 years ago. She tried to attack him. She slipped the leash and my ex laid on top of her so we could get out of the yard.

I know it’s crazy. I think she should be euthanized, but my daughter says no. It is her decision.

Then your daughter needs to deal with it. Your daughter is essentially saying she prefers to have your dog killed painfully over having her father’s dog killed peacefully, and that’s not her choice to make.

She is swimming in grief and loss at the moment. She just lost her father.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here again. I want to believe she’s too old to be attacking other dogs.

Yet you said she went for your dog when it was 2.5? So this is 6 months later? And you say it’s your daughter’s decision, not yours?

I’m having a hard time believing this isn’t a post to get people riled up about pit mix dogs.

No, I said that was when I got him 2.5 years ago.

You can believe what you want.

I think being old would be more risk, maybe they wouldn't chase as much, but better chance they end up in pain from bad teeth or arthritic joints or some and become even more reactive.

You need to keep this in your daughter's lane and not let this become a you problem, that you won't take the dog.

Give her perspective. Point out everything from exes perspective (dad never asked me to take dog because he knew etc).

Anonymous wrote:Op here again. I want to believe she’s too old to be attacking other dogs.

Yet you said she went for your dog when it was 2.5? So this is 6 months later? And you say it’s your daughter’s decision, not yours?

I’m having a hard time believing this isn’t a post to get people riled up about pit mix dogs.

Anonymous wrote:Op here again. I want to believe she’s too old to be attacking other dogs.

Hope is not a plan

OP, you know what to do. Do NOT let this aggressive dog into your home, and DO NOT sacrifice your existing 3-year-old dog in this way.

Your daughter does not get to dictate what you need to do, especially when it's so risky.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Describe the aggression.

My dog is aggressive with larger dogs, not smaller or same sized dogs. I've been able to foster a multitude of dogs, all smaller than he is.

She’s bitten dogs at the vet, and now has to be muzzled. She’s killed small animals in the yard. I tried to introduce her to my dog when I got him 2.5 years ago. She tried to attack him. She slipped the leash and my ex laid on top of her so we could get out of the yard.

I know it’s crazy. I think she should be euthanized, but my daughter says no. It is her decision.

Is it cost prohibitive to see if your daughter to get out of her lease? Then she could be the point person and it’s her responsibility to either find a rescue, house the dog herself, or make the hard decision to say good bye.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Describe the aggression.

My dog is aggressive with larger dogs, not smaller or same sized dogs. I've been able to foster a multitude of dogs, all smaller than he is.

She’s bitten dogs at the vet, and now has to be muzzled. She’s killed small animals in the yard. I tried to introduce her to my dog when I got him 2.5 years ago. She tried to attack him. She slipped the leash and my ex laid on top of her so we could get out of the yard.

I know it’s crazy. I think she should be euthanized, but my daughter says no. It is her decision.

I'm really sorry about your partner's death

This dog probably isn't unadoptable but it will be hard to find them a home. That's going to be especially hard now that shelters are so full. But dogs with a compelling story do get adopted more quickly and readily - and the story of your ex dying and the dog now needing a home is compelling. You can at least try to find them a new home this way.

You could try introducing the dog to your dog - but I feel your apprehension and I don't think you're wrong. Your first priority has to be to your existing dog.

Where is the dog now?

Can the daughter try to help place the dog, even if she can't keep him?