Anonymous
08/31/2023 07:30
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Nothing. You don't even know yourself.
This!
My parents 100% thought I was gay. I had a really awkward conversation about it and how I should quit my sport because of the lesbians. I'm not now nor have I ever been attracted to women! I was friends with my lesbian teammates, but nothing more than that. Truth is you don't know! Fast forward 20+ years - happily married in a heterosexual relationship worh 2 kids. You don't know what you don't know. I'm simply a sporty tomboy, always have been.
Right, I dont know, but I get a strong vibe. Should I ignore it because I don't have proof?
Anonymous
08/31/2023 07:25
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:When you say that you are confident that she is gay, are you so confident that you’d allow her to have guy friends sleep over?
At this point, I would feel better about her having a guy over than a girl from the perspective of what I think she'd be interested in.
Anonymous
08/31/2023 07:24
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Nothing. You don't even know yourself.
Pretty sure I do, and pretty sure these are more than friends.
Wait, you think your daughter is gay, involved in a romantic relationship with more than 1 girl, and wants to invite her multiple romantic partners for a sleepover?
Yeah, this has troll written all over it. Try again, OP.
I am NOT a troll. Yes, I've been vague, because even on an anonymous forum I feel uncomfortable talking about my daughter's sexuality because she isn't even out to me.
1. I am fairly sure she is gay. She has not yet come out to me.
2. She is 12. She is mature for her age.
3. I am realizing, in retrospect, that she has had several friends who are girls in a series of friendships. I now wonder in retrospect if at least one has been more than friendships. These girls have spent the night in the same room/bed.
4. My oldest is straight, but hasn't had a boyfriend. So, I don't know yet how and when we will feel about opposite sex sleepovers, but it seems the same rules that apply to the oldest for boys should apply to the youngest for girls.
Anonymous
08/31/2023 06:33
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:I have an 11yo I think may be gay. Right now she had no interest in either sex, but when she does I can see it. I would allow sleepovers currently.
Plus, if anything is happening, it is not like she could get pregnant.
Anonymous
08/31/2023 06:23
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
I have an 11yo I think may be gay. Right now she had no interest in either sex, but when she does I can see it. I would allow sleepovers currently.
Anonymous
08/31/2023 05:43
Subject: Re:child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Why do you suspect? Does she have a septum piercing?
Anonymous
08/31/2023 04:16
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am fairly sure she is gay, but she hasn't come out yet.
What do we do about same-sex sleepovers, which we have always allowed?
She has 2 sisters.
At a certain age, sleepovers are no longer allowed. That would be ages 12-13 anyway.
Most kids have sleepovers through high school
Mine didn’t. They did them all the time from about age 5-12 but when HS rolled around they preferred their own beds.
There may be some girls who don’t have them but sleepovers are very common in high school. They don’t stop for all kids at 12.
Anonymous
08/31/2023 04:12
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Nothing. You don't even know yourself.
Pretty sure I do, and pretty sure these are more than friends.
Wait, you think your daughter is gay, involved in a romantic relationship with more than 1 girl, and wants to invite her multiple romantic partners for a sleepover?
Yeah, this has troll written all over it. Try again, OP.
No, not necessarily.
How are you so certain things are not happening at “innocent sleepovers” when everyone growing up today is LGTBQIA+ ?
Anonymous
08/30/2023 23:23
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
When you say that you are confident that she is gay, are you so confident that you’d allow her to have guy friends sleep over?
Anonymous
08/30/2023 23:18
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Let these kids have sleepovers my god
You are a bunch of kill joys
Let her be a kid.
You are a bunch of kill joys
Let her be a kid.
Anonymous
08/30/2023 22:26
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:Nothing. You don't even know yourself.
This!
My parents 100% thought I was gay. I had a really awkward conversation about it and how I should quit my sport because of the lesbians. I'm not now nor have I ever been attracted to women! I was friends with my lesbian teammates, but nothing more than that. Truth is you don't know! Fast forward 20+ years - happily married in a heterosexual relationship worh 2 kids. You don't know what you don't know. I'm simply a sporty tomboy, always have been.
Anonymous
08/30/2023 22:16
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:How is the "2 sisters" part relevant? Are you worried about incest?
Um because the sisters are probably allowed to have same sex sleepovers?! And were allowed at tweens age? So rule setting may be trickier. Not sure why you would jump to incest.
Anonymous
08/30/2023 22:13
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You do nothing. I’m sure she can control herself.
Would you also be okay with straight tweens of the opposite sex having a sleepover?
It's not the same because there are way less risks with two female tween exploring. It might not be ideal, but it's not the same.
Which risks are you referring to that are way less? Pregnancy, STD?
Unless you are a rare "anti-abortion, even for my own kid" person, it's pretty similar.
Not the pp, but have you had an abortion? I did at 18 and it was not easy breezy. Have you had a baby? I don't see how you find gay vs straight tween like-them-more-than-friends sleepovers similar risks at all.
Anonymous
08/30/2023 22:04
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You do nothing. I’m sure she can control herself.
Would you also be okay with straight tweens of the opposite sex having a sleepover?
It's not the same because there are way less risks with two female tween exploring. It might not be ideal, but it's not the same.
Which risks are you referring to that are way less? Pregnancy, STD?
Unless you are a rare "anti-abortion, even for my own kid" person, it's pretty similar.
I am pro-choice. But I don't think an abortion is risk free physically or emotionally. I would much rather my hypothetical tween (cause I only have boys) not get pregnant, than have to go through an invasive medical procedure.
And yes the rates of STD's are different as well.
Plus there is often a size and strength differential in opposite sex couples that can complicate things.
Anonymous
08/30/2023 22:00
Subject: child is gay but not out and sleepovers
How is the "2 sisters" part relevant? Are you worried about incest?