I think the court needs to redirect who has custody of the children.

Anonymous wrote:Why did you get sole custody and sole control of educational decisions? What was that based on?

Before we were divorced, I was already the primary parent. I volunteered at the schools and I enrolled the kids. It was his idea to give me sole control of educational decisions. I don't have sole custody; the kids see him every weekend when he does not have to work.

OP knows she is wrong; she is looking for someone to provide a rationalization she can't think of.

You told your daughter to lie to her father about what school she goes to?????

Unless he is abusive and you are in hiding, that is inexcusable

"he has been withholding child support (he claims that the state has been holding the support, but I could get the money quicker if he gave one big payment a month and not divide it into 2-3 payments a month)."

What does this mean?

Why did you get sole custody and sole control of educational decisions? What was that based on?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll be the voice of dissent. Sometimes, with shitty exes, you have to be practical. It’s not ideal but it’s the best situation. But can’t they garnish his wages or something? Or jail him even?

There is zero evidence he is a “shitty ex.”

Wherever did you get that?

He was deployed. Now he is not. He should take her to court for 50/50 now.

You don't know the details but if I add more then you accuse me of trolling. He has made incredibly poor decisions. Even when he wasn't deployed, he wouldn't do a thing at home. He wanted me to work but also didn't want to pay for day care. And he has no interest in 50/50 considering that he lives in a one-bedroom apartment and doesn't feed the kids unless they ask. I don't even want to give the reason we divorced because you will accuse me of trolling and report the thread.

Anonymous wrote:You are the arsehole.

I hope he finds out you have these means and challenges whatever child support you are getting.

This is beyond ridiculous. You shouldn’t make these kinds of decisions unilaterally. Especially the religious indoctrination—

Hopefully he goes back to court to challenge the custody arrangement. I would.

Means? You don’t understand child support.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll be the voice of dissent. Sometimes, with shitty exes, you have to be practical. It’s not ideal but it’s the best situation. But can’t they garnish his wages or something? Or jail him even?

There is zero evidence he is a “shitty ex.”

Wherever did you get that?

He was deployed. Now he is not. He should take her to court for 50/50 now.

Withholding child support to his kids.... that is pretty shitty.

Anonymous wrote:You are the arsehole.

I hope he finds out you have these means and challenges whatever child support you are getting.

This is beyond ridiculous. You shouldn’t make these kinds of decisions unilaterally. Especially the religious indoctrination—

Hopefully he goes back to court to challenge the custody arrangement. I would.

Not his money. None of his business. He still has to pay the court ordered support.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have the right to make all education decisions, then it doesn’t matter if he objects. He still owes you child support. It DOES matter if you lie to him or have your children lie to him.

I haven't directly lied to him because he has never asked me what school they go to.

So....if your spouse were having an affair and didn't tell you, it's okay? Not really lying?

How are these two even comparable? Some logic, please.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have the right to make all education decisions, then it doesn’t matter if he objects. He still owes you child support. It DOES matter if you lie to him or have your children lie to him.

I haven't directly lied to him because he has never asked me what school they go to.

Lies of commission and lies of omission will both guarantee you a ticket to Hell.

Anonymous wrote:I’ll be the voice of dissent. Sometimes, with shitty exes, you have to be practical. It’s not ideal but it’s the best situation. But can’t they garnish his wages or something? Or jail him even?

There is zero evidence he is a “shitty ex.”

Wherever did you get that?

He was deployed. Now he is not. He should take her to court for 50/50 now.

Your kids. Your daughter. Your oldest. Is he the children’s father? If so, why do you keep saying they are just your kids?

You are the arsehole.

I hope he finds out you have these means and challenges whatever child support you are getting.

This is beyond ridiculous. You shouldn’t make these kinds of decisions unilaterally. Especially the religious indoctrination—

Hopefully he goes back to court to challenge the custody arrangement. I would.