Anonymous wrote:Fire her immediately and hire someone that tells you everything is wrong.

Anonymous wrote:She may just not be very smart and therefore she has more reason to be cheerful than most of us smart ones.

Anonymous wrote:You decide how you are, she decides how she is, you don't approve of her choice. she isn't letting your choice bother her. You are letting her choice bother you.

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Anonymous wrote:I think people need to stop calling others fake. It takes so much energy and effort to put on an act, PP. 99.99% of people aren't going to do that. They might exaggerate part of their personality for the workplace if they find it works for them... but it's not fake in the sense that they already have tendencies to be that way naturally.

I would have to fake it. That's why I worried.

You "would have", so you wouldn't actually fake it, because it's too much work. And why do you need to worry, even if she's putting on act? This is just a transaction, OP. You're not seeking a life partner here. Why are you expending this much mind space on your contractor's personality? You look like the weird one, here, not her.

I am worried I won't get honest feedback from someone who might not be honest with her personality.

She will give you honest feedback, but if she's usually very positive, bear in mind that she might couch criticism so constructively that you will have to pay attention to what she wants you to change.

My kids have had music teachers and academic tutors like this. They've learned to listen and pay attention to what actually needs to change, even when it's delivered like this, I kid you not: "Wow! This was very very good! Really very very very very very very good! Now if I can just hear that again, with a tiny bit more vibrato on the E string and articulation at the end of the phrase! But otherwise you did such a wonderful job!...!!!" (Large smile, sparkling eyes, all friendship and enthusiasm). Some people are like that.

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Anonymous wrote:I think people need to stop calling others fake. It takes so much energy and effort to put on an act, PP. 99.99% of people aren't going to do that. They might exaggerate part of their personality for the workplace if they find it works for them... but it's not fake in the sense that they already have tendencies to be that way naturally.

I would have to fake it. That's why I worried.

You "would have", so you wouldn't actually fake it, because it's too much work. And why do you need to worry, even if she's putting on act? This is just a transaction, OP. You're not seeking a life partner here. Why are you expending this much mind space on your contractor's personality? You look like the weird one, here, not her.

I am worried I won't get honest feedback from someone who might not be honest with her personality.

Anonymous wrote:I think often that level of enthusiasm is often faked cheeriness, but I don't think that means she "manipulated" you into hiring her. It might just mean that this is the work persona she's adopted because it helps her get through the day, or she's found people respond better to it, or she's masking other things. She might be "faking it til she makes it" or using cheerfulness to deal with burnout. You don't know.

Some people may genuinely be like this, though I also think if it feels fake, it probably is. I think you can intuit when someone isn't being genuine.

I only mind fake friendliness when there's a dark side to it. Like I've met people who are very fake friendly and cheerful and then it turns out they are major gossips. This actually is manipulative because they sometimes get you to open up more due to their cheerfulness, and then will share everything you say with other people. But then the issue is not that they are fake cheerful, it's that they are gossips. On it's own, fake cheerfulness is pretty harmless and could actually be nice.

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Anonymous wrote:I think people need to stop calling others fake. It takes so much energy and effort to put on an act, PP. 99.99% of people aren't going to do that. They might exaggerate part of their personality for the workplace if they find it works for them... but it's not fake in the sense that they already have tendencies to be that way naturally.

I would have to fake it. That's why I worried.

You "would have", so you wouldn't actually fake it, because it's too much work. And why do you need to worry, even if she's putting on act? This is just a transaction, OP. You're not seeking a life partner here. Why are you expending this much mind space on your contractor's personality? You look like the weird one, here, not her.

I am worried I won't get honest feedback from someone who might not be honest with her personality.

(She's an editor.)

In that case, she wouldn't be doing a good job. Personality is irrelevant.

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Anonymous wrote:I think people need to stop calling others fake. It takes so much energy and effort to put on an act, PP. 99.99% of people aren't going to do that. They might exaggerate part of their personality for the workplace if they find it works for them... but it's not fake in the sense that they already have tendencies to be that way naturally.

I would have to fake it. That's why I worried.

You "would have", so you wouldn't actually fake it, because it's too much work. And why do you need to worry, even if she's putting on act? This is just a transaction, OP. You're not seeking a life partner here. Why are you expending this much mind space on your contractor's personality? You look like the weird one, here, not her.

I am worried I won't get honest feedback from someone who might not be honest with her personality.

(She's an editor.)

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I think people need to stop calling others fake. It takes so much energy and effort to put on an act, PP. 99.99% of people aren't going to do that. They might exaggerate part of their personality for the workplace if they find it works for them... but it's not fake in the sense that they already have tendencies to be that way naturally.

I would have to fake it. That's why I worried.

You "would have", so you wouldn't actually fake it, because it's too much work. And why do you need to worry, even if she's putting on act? This is just a transaction, OP. You're not seeking a life partner here. Why are you expending this much mind space on your contractor's personality? You look like the weird one, here, not her.

I am worried I won't get honest feedback from someone who might not be honest with her personality.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think people need to stop calling others fake. It takes so much energy and effort to put on an act, PP. 99.99% of people aren't going to do that. They might exaggerate part of their personality for the workplace if they find it works for them... but it's not fake in the sense that they already have tendencies to be that way naturally.

I would have to fake it. That's why I worried.

You "would have", so you wouldn't actually fake it, because it's too much work. And why do you need to worry, even if she's putting on act? This is just a transaction, OP. You're not seeking a life partner here. Why are you expending this much mind space on your contractor's personality? You look like the weird one, here, not her.

Anonymous wrote:My friend is like this and it is 100% genuine. She's been called fake a lot and been mocked. Its sad that we are at a point of people being suspicious of happy and cheerful people