Anonymous
Post 07/19/2023 18:43     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is what our Peditrician just told us at our 2 year well visit.

He said all was well but to get DD to a pediatric dentist due to concerns teeth and jaw alignment. He noticed she had her two fingers hooked in her mouth and she was sucking. She’s always done this when she was anxious or sleepy.

He said it needed to be addressed ASAP and we are serious about addressing it but I was caught off guard when he went on a lecture about “unaddressed and unresolved trauma”.

He assured us it didn’t mean she was abused or is being abused, and that childhood trauma is fairly normal. Especially medical trauma or separation trauma. DD stays at home with me but she got RSV at 7 months and was hospitalized for weeks and it was VERY traumatic for us, but figured she’d forget it.

I did notice an uptick in this because while she was hospitalized. I couldn’t nurse her for comfort due to tubes and monitors so she definitely was sucking on her hands more.

I know we couldn’t help any of this but this makes me feel horrible. I found some data on finger/thumb sucking and self soothing and some on trauma but is there really a direct correlation?

Babies do not forget a traumatic event like a sudden separation from their mother. I wish they had let you stay her.


Where did OP say she wasn’t at the hospital.


I did stay. Either DH or I was with her 24/7. She just couldn’t nurse on demand or nurse to sleep because she needed to be monitored.
Anonymous
Post 07/19/2023 08:30     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:More mom guilt to lay on us. I guess you weren't feeling the eternal mom guilt strong enough so pedi decided to give you a good dose of it

Please grow up a little. That nonsense is a worn out card. Stay on topic.


What are you talking about? “Mom guilt” is real, and it absolutely sounds like her pediatrician was laying it on thick spouting off his nonsense.
Anonymous
Post 07/19/2023 07:45     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
My kid sucked her thumb from 4mos to age 3 when we first went to the dentist. The dentist said she should stop because it was changing the shape of the roof of her mouth. We came up with an incentive and she went cold turkey.
No trauma and no teeth issues.
Anonymous
Post 07/19/2023 07:22     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is what our Peditrician just told us at our 2 year well visit.

He said all was well but to get DD to a pediatric dentist due to concerns teeth and jaw alignment. He noticed she had her two fingers hooked in her mouth and she was sucking. She’s always done this when she was anxious or sleepy.

He said it needed to be addressed ASAP and we are serious about addressing it but I was caught off guard when he went on a lecture about “unaddressed and unresolved trauma”.

He assured us it didn’t mean she was abused or is being abused, and that childhood trauma is fairly normal. Especially medical trauma or separation trauma. DD stays at home with me but she got RSV at 7 months and was hospitalized for weeks and it was VERY traumatic for us, but figured she’d forget it.

I did notice an uptick in this because while she was hospitalized. I couldn’t nurse her for comfort due to tubes and monitors so she definitely was sucking on her hands more.

I know we couldn’t help any of this but this makes me feel horrible. I found some data on finger/thumb sucking and self soothing and some on trauma but is there really a direct correlation?

Babies do not forget a traumatic event like a sudden separation from their mother. I wish they had let you stay her.


Where did OP say she wasn’t at the hospital.
Anonymous
Post 07/19/2023 03:06     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
Anonymous wrote:More mom guilt to lay on us. I guess you weren't feeling the eternal mom guilt strong enough so pedi decided to give you a good dose of it

Please grow up a little. That nonsense is a worn out card. Stay on topic.
Anonymous
Post 07/19/2023 03:04     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
More mom guilt to lay on us. I guess you weren't feeling the eternal mom guilt strong enough so pedi decided to give you a good dose of it
Anonymous
Post 07/19/2023 02:53     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
Anonymous wrote:This is what our Peditrician just told us at our 2 year well visit.

He said all was well but to get DD to a pediatric dentist due to concerns teeth and jaw alignment. He noticed she had her two fingers hooked in her mouth and she was sucking. She’s always done this when she was anxious or sleepy.

He said it needed to be addressed ASAP and we are serious about addressing it but I was caught off guard when he went on a lecture about “unaddressed and unresolved trauma”.

He assured us it didn’t mean she was abused or is being abused, and that childhood trauma is fairly normal. Especially medical trauma or separation trauma. DD stays at home with me but she got RSV at 7 months and was hospitalized for weeks and it was VERY traumatic for us, but figured she’d forget it.

I did notice an uptick in this because while she was hospitalized. I couldn’t nurse her for comfort due to tubes and monitors so she definitely was sucking on her hands more.

I know we couldn’t help any of this but this makes me feel horrible. I found some data on finger/thumb sucking and self soothing and some on trauma but is there really a direct correlation?

Babies do not forget a traumatic event like a sudden separation from their mother. I wish they had let you stay her.
Anonymous
Post 07/19/2023 00:07     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
Anonymous wrote:This is what our Peditrician just told us at our 2 year well visit.

He said all was well but to get DD to a pediatric dentist due to concerns teeth and jaw alignment. He noticed she had her two fingers hooked in her mouth and she was sucking. She’s always done this when she was anxious or sleepy.

He said it needed to be addressed ASAP and we are serious about addressing it but I was caught off guard when he went on a lecture about “unaddressed and unresolved trauma”.

He assured us it didn’t mean she was abused or is being abused, and that childhood trauma is fairly normal. Especially medical trauma or separation trauma. DD stays at home with me but she got RSV at 7 months and was hospitalized for weeks and it was VERY traumatic for us, but figured she’d forget it.

I did notice an uptick in this because while she was hospitalized. I couldn’t nurse her for comfort due to tubes and monitors so she definitely was sucking on her hands more.

I know we couldn’t help any of this but this makes me feel horrible. I found some data on finger/thumb sucking and self soothing and some on trauma but is there really a direct correlation?


Ah! A new APA scare tactic! I call ridiculous.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2023 21:44     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
I was a thumb sucker until I was 10. I think it's anxiety so both the orthodontist who said "self soothing" and Dr who said "trauma" are right. A high anxiety kid experiences many things as traumatic, even things others dont experiencethat way. I didn't realize how anxious I was until my kids inherited it. I thought I was just very type A. One child was diagnosed as high anxiety at 4; the other is selectively mute, an anxiety disorder (also diagnosed at 4). It's nothing you did except maybe you or your husband, or another relative have the gene. In our case it comes from both sides.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2023 21:01     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
Anonymous wrote:First, I’m sorry you and your daughter went through the hospitalization experience. My second was hospitalized while I was on maternity leave and it was one of the worst experiences.

Second, your pediatrician is speaking nonsense. I would find a new pediatrician. If you’re not interested in switching, I would ask him to provide the peer reviewed research to back up his claim. If he’s unable or unwilling to provide it, I would definitely switch.


+100 to all of the above
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2023 20:58     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
I would also get a new ped. That's cray!
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2023 19:40     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
I would get a new pediatrician. It's concerning that he's so comfortable talking nonsense outside of his area of expertise.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2023 19:37     Subject: Re:Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
Anonymous wrote:My sister sucked her fingers until she was 10. Looking back, she has always had a more sensitive nervous system and really did need some kind of coping mechanism/self-soothing. She has ADHD, considers herself highly sensitive and has a few other health/personality concerns.


There are all sorts of things that are totally normal at 2, and are concerning at 10.

If your sister wasn't reading, or toilet trained, or using complete sentences at 10 that would be concerning too.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2023 19:31     Subject: Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
Anonymous wrote:First, I’m sorry you and your daughter went through the hospitalization experience. My second was hospitalized while I was on maternity leave and it was one of the worst experiences.

Second, your pediatrician is speaking nonsense. I would find a new pediatrician. If you’re not interested in switching, I would ask him to provide the peer reviewed research to back up his claim. If he’s unable or unwilling to provide it, I would definitely switch.


+1...Bye Bye to the Pediatrician. Thumb sucking is very common in young children...no different than a pacifier. DS was a huge thumb sucker till about 3 when he stopped on his own. He turned 23 yesterday and is a fabulous young man with a job and happy life.
Anonymous
Post 07/18/2023 19:29     Subject: Re:Thumb & finger sucking in toddlerhood = unaddressed trauma?
My sister sucked her fingers until she was 10. Looking back, she has always had a more sensitive nervous system and really did need some kind of coping mechanism/self-soothing. She has ADHD, considers herself highly sensitive and has a few other health/personality concerns.