You have to be cruel to be kind, IMHO.

The meanest people are those who drag it out longer than necessary, wasting someone's time and other opportunities to be with someone who does want to be with them. Or who ghost, or put them on the back burner, or stay with them and then criticize everything about them, or just have very randomized and rare communication. Not only do these tactics hurt the person, they cause lingering trauma which damages them for their next relationship.

So you say, "I think you're a [great/kind/cool/XYZ] but I don't see this going anywhere. I wish you the best." And then go no contact so you don't string anyone along.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You write a message that's basically like, thank you for your time, we're not a match romantically but I wish you all the best. And then you IGNORE.

What makes you think a response will come? The other person probs knows
where things are going.

NP

oh man, I’ve gotten manifestos from guys telling me how wrong I am, and that I’m missing out. Save it for therapy level stuff. It happens.

Dear fellow men. If you write out what this woman above is describing, you look needy, insecure, and pathetic. No woman finds that attractive. Please don't do this to yourself.

Anonymous wrote:Dear [friend], thank you for expressing an interest in a romantic relationship with me. At this time, however, I have decided to move forward with other candidates. It was a pleasure meeting you, and best of luck in your pursuit of a relationship.

Yes, text this. He’ll be relieved.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You write a message that's basically like, thank you for your time, we're not a match romantically but I wish you all the best. And then you IGNORE.

What makes you think a response will come? The other person probs knows
where things are going.

NP

oh man, I’ve gotten manifestos from guys telling me how wrong I am, and that I’m missing out. Save it for therapy level stuff. It happens.

Send your message and block.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dear [friend], thank you for expressing an interest in a romantic relationship with me. At this time, however, I have decided to move forward with other candidates. It was a pleasure meeting you, and best of luck in your pursuit of a relationship.

This is exactly what you should not write.

There is no " at this time".

Write: Thanks for the night out. I am not interested in a romantic relationship. Best of luck.

Keep it brief and honest. Don't leave room for misinterpretation. " At this time" is fodder for stalkers who would keep checking in hoping to catch you at a better time.

It was a joke. Parody of a job application.

It was very clear your post was a joke. I thought it was funny.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dear [friend], thank you for expressing an interest in a romantic relationship with me. At this time, however, I have decided to move forward with other candidates. It was a pleasure meeting you, and best of luck in your pursuit of a relationship.

This is exactly what you should not write.

There is no " at this time".

Write: Thanks for the night out. I am not interested in a romantic relationship. Best of luck.

Keep it brief and honest. Don't leave room for misinterpretation. " At this time" is fodder for stalkers who would keep checking in hoping to catch you at a better time.

It was a joke. Parody of a job application.

If you are self aware to say "friend zone", don't do it.

Break off the romance, and go back to being acquaintances.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You write a message that's basically like, thank you for your time, we're not a match romantically but I wish you all the best. And then you IGNORE.

What makes you think a response will come? The other person probs knows
where things are going.

NP

oh man, I’ve gotten manifestos from guys telling me how wrong I am, and that I’m missing out. Save it for therapy level stuff. It happens.