OP, I have been flying with DD all over the place since she was less than 2 years old (she’s a teen) and it’s a fool’s errand to try to enforce a sleep schedule. If nothing else, the airlines will feed you or make announcements at the absolute worst time, and mess up your plans.

For our family, what helps is to stay active until we get to a reasonable sleeping hour local time, wherever we are. The worst is when we go to India (leaving next week). Flights land early in the morning, like 2-3 AM. By the time we’re done with immigration and customs and get home, it’s 6-7 AM. So you have to basically go a full day with no naps. Not gonna lie, that’s really hard, so we take a shower, have breakfast, and leave, forcing ourselves to stay awake by not being any place where we can sleep. Malls are great for that.

We do the equivalent of that every place we go - if we’re tourists, the first day is packed, just to get us to night time with no nap breaks. The rest is easy.

Anonymous wrote:Amazingly enough I had minimal jet lag flying to Korea. Had worse jet lag in UK, Europe and Middle East. The time difference with Korea was so big that I just had day and night flip completely. Felt much easier than a smaller time difference of 5-8 hours.

This is normal, it's harder to fly east than west. In Asia it's easy to fall asleep at the new time but you'll likely wake too early, just go back to bed. In Europe jet lag is like illness.

Amazingly enough I had minimal jet lag flying to Korea. Had worse jet lag in UK, Europe and Middle East. The time difference with Korea was so big that I just had day and night flip completely. Felt much easier than a smaller time difference of 5-8 hours.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We flew nyc to Singapore last December with an 8, 10 & 13yo. They were all pretty tired by the time the flight took off (shortly before midnight) but we all watched a movie and some ate something, then we slept. Everyone slept at least 6 hours or so and then some of us napped again later. It really wasn’t that bad. We landed @7am in Singapore and got breakfast and sunlight. We had a connecting flight to Hanoi and landed there midday. We took a nap, then pushed through the evening and went to bed @8pm. Then we all slept decently well and then we had a full day the next day and by the day after that we were all pretty adjusted. I agree that a 12/13 hour difference is actually easier in some ways than 6/7 because it gives your system more of a shock but the daylight/nighttime helps more.

how are you able to get 6 hours of sleep on a plane? did you fly business or first class?

Nope. It was Sing Air so it was premium economy but it wasn’t much above regular economy. We were all tired and because it’s such a long flight they make the plane dark and mostly quiet and most people slept. It really wasn’t that bad. I didn’t have a functioning footrest - the rest of the family did - and that helped but it wasn’t a big pitch or anything.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m planning Chicago to Tokyo with two little kids. Our flight leaves around 5:30pm, lands around 8:30pm. My plan is to not make them try to sleep. They can snack and watch and play. If they get 3-4 hours of sleep, fine. Then we check into a hotel at the airport and hopefully all sleep. My one fear is that my five year old will sleep a full night on the plane and then be raring to go when we get to Tokyo.

My worry would be is that they'll fall asleep for the last 5-6 hours of the flight when they are exhausted, then be up in Tokyo until 3 am, and then you're screwed.

Fair enough, but what else to do? Let them sleep a lot on the plane and they'll be up all night in Tokyo. I think my only hope is us planning to be extra tired when we arrive. It's currently planned so that we have to clear customs at Haneda and get to our beds in the domestic terminal. We have a connecting flight to Osaka early the following afternoon. The day after arrival is planned as an easy day - all we have to do is get from Haneda to our hotel in Kyoto. (And for anyone thinking we should take the train from Haneda to Kyoto, the international flights were about a hundred dollars cheaper per person to connect to Osaka/KIX instead of terminating in Tokyo. Open jaw, return nonstop via Tokyo.)

Anonymous wrote:Going over isn't too terrible. Try and get right on their schedule and go to bed at a reasonable time. Coming home is rough. Expect at least 1-2 weeks of jetlag. My son has been to many countries with us and this one did him in. Always worth it, though!

This is why we will only visit Asia during either summer or winter break. The jet lag is too much for spring break (1 week).

The best way is always to eat at the correct times in the new timezone and if you can, sleep at the right times too. Kids will adapt a lot quicker than you will.

Based off what I'm reading here, OP sounds like they would be miserable to vacation with. I bet they have the trip planned to the nanosecond and would not be willing to let the family deviate from the plan in any way.

Anonymous wrote:We flew nyc to Singapore last December with an 8, 10 & 13yo. They were all pretty tired by the time the flight took off (shortly before midnight) but we all watched a movie and some ate something, then we slept. Everyone slept at least 6 hours or so and then some of us napped again later. It really wasn’t that bad. We landed @7am in Singapore and got breakfast and sunlight. We had a connecting flight to Hanoi and landed there midday. We took a nap, then pushed through the evening and went to bed @8pm. Then we all slept decently well and then we had a full day the next day and by the day after that we were all pretty adjusted. I agree that a 12/13 hour difference is actually easier in some ways than 6/7 because it gives your system more of a shock but the daylight/nighttime helps more.

how are you able to get 6 hours of sleep on a plane? did you fly business or first class?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Long flights suck. Let people pass the time as they want.

Wearing sunglasses during the departure day and at the airport will do nothing.

Staying in light and keeping moving until 7pm on your arrival day is all you can do.

Agreed. You sound like a control freak. Your kids are teenagers, not toddlers!

Perhaps. But I'm willing to wear the title if it means we can enjoy the vacation during normal hours instead of from 3 am - 3 pm because everyone's jet lagged for the entire time. Why not try to alleviate it a bit?

I think it's ok to tell your 12 and 14 year old what to do. The 19 year old - yeah I guess I can't MAKE him do what I say -- can't make anyone do what I say, really -- but hopefully they also want to enjoy the vacation and are willing to do their part.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Long flights suck. Let people pass the time as they want.

Wearing sunglasses during the departure day and at the airport will do nothing.

Staying in light and keeping moving until 7pm on your arrival day is all you can do.

This. Trying to control how your family spends their time on a plane will only cause misery for you and them. If I were your 19 year old I would laugh at you and promptly watch 12 hours of movies. People will have the jetlag experience that they do--let the chips fall as they may.

I hear you, but I'm spending close to $40,000 on this vacation and I will be damned if everyone is done for the day at 3 pm and then awake at 2 am for the entire trip. I think asking the family to try to alleviate jet lag is a reasonable request. I can't control what they do, but I can sure as hell make a strong recommendation.

Anonymous wrote:I’m planning Chicago to Tokyo with two little kids. Our flight leaves around 5:30pm, lands around 8:30pm. My plan is to not make them try to sleep. They can snack and watch and play. If they get 3-4 hours of sleep, fine. Then we check into a hotel at the airport and hopefully all sleep. My one fear is that my five year old will sleep a full night on the plane and then be raring to go when we get to Tokyo.

My worry would be is that they'll fall asleep for the last 5-6 hours of the flight when they are exhausted, then be up in Tokyo until 3 am, and then you're screwed.

Everyone is different. DS (10) and I are similar where a big time difference rarely impacts us (10+ hours). Our bodies just seem to adjust to the difference even if wr don't sleep much on the flight. A 4-7 hr time difference impacts us more. We tend to stay up later and sleep a little later. DS has been like this since we started this type of travel when he was 5.

DH is the opposite. He struggles for a few days on big time differences and has zero issues with shorter ones. It doesn't matter what he does to prep, he just has to power through.

But I think thats how we are in regular life. DS was always the baby and toddler who easily adjusted to changes in his nap and bed schedule and I easily adapt to change in sleep schedule. Dh is much more regimented. He goes to bed at almost the same time and wakes up at almost the same time. And when his schedule gets off he feels it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Long flights suck. Let people pass the time as they want.

Wearing sunglasses during the departure day and at the airport will do nothing.

Staying in light and keeping moving until 7pm on your arrival day is all you can do.

Agreed. You sound like a control freak. Your kids are teenagers, not toddlers!

Agree! Every person is different OP.Some people do not get jet lagged....many others do. Contrary to your idea, I thought it was very helpful to watch our screens because it helped us pass the time and we all fell asleep watching on our long flight to Singapore.

* My personal tip that would seem severe to many is to skip any and all airplane meals and bring small amounts of cut up veges/ fruits. Drink water only.

Anonymous wrote:Long flights suck. Let people pass the time as they want.

Wearing sunglasses during the departure day and at the airport will do nothing.

Staying in light and keeping moving until 7pm on your arrival day is all you can do.

Agreed. You sound like a control freak. Your kids are teenagers, not toddlers!