Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you're going through serious trauma. I think its wonderful you're so caring towards this cat but the woman is clearly unbalanced / unhinged and whatever she says, she is in charge of the cats and deems your home potentially unsafe.

There is nothing you can do. She is not harassing you, its just an unpleasant situation which I hope is over for you very soon. Good luck.

I think you and some other PPs have missed the fact that the OP is a victim of domestic violence (see her first post) and was in a situation where it was temporarily unclear if she had to move out, if the abusive BF was going to move, etc. We don't know what other aspects there are to their relationship. She may have good reason to worry about her safety if her abusive ex-BF finds this post and feels aggrieved that somehow she, and by association, he, has been identiifed so anyone who knows them would recogize the situation. All it would take for one mutual not-so-great friend, who knows OP worked with this rescue charity, to point out that post to the ex-BF, for him to decide to make trouble for OP about it.

So it may not be harassment, which has to be ongoing and sustained, but it IS possibly something which could create real problems for OP. All because this nutty woman who puts animals above humans decided to be a crazy beyotch. It's easy to blame OP and say "You shouldn't have told her so much!" but OP felt this person was giving some sympathy and support and made a mistake. Crazy beyotch charity lady is the one to blame here, and OP should send the certified letter an earlier PP described.

I am the OP. Yes, thank you for getting it and to other posters who showed me compassion. I'm literally at my lowest point right now.
I feel unsafe that she posted this. There are identifying details in the post. And I am worried someone may be a mutual friend and will know who she's talking about. She's the type of person that adds someone after meeting them in person one time. And we live in a community where a lot of people know one another.

OP - I am so sorry you are going through this. I feel your anguish over this cat - you must be so worried.

You may not have any actual legal recourse - but many people have had a lawyer send a cease and desist letter anyway. If you have the funds to hire a lawyer for that - it's a quick job - or you have any lawyer friends, it's worth looking into.

If you are worried about the cats, you can call animal services and have them do a welfare check. You can also threaten to do that, if the rescue director doesn't tell you where the cat is and give you the opportunity to adopt them. It is escalatory but something to consider.

You don't deserve any of this. You trusted someone, when maybe you shouldn't have - but that doesn't mean you deserve to be publicly humiliated or to have a cat you nurtured for a year taken away from you.

You might also want to try reaching out to someone at the vet's office to see if they can give you any info - a receptionist or a vet tech. They may say no, but they may not.

Report her post to the social media platform. They may take it down if it’s that bad.

hold on. we're talking about a kitten (presumably) that you got 1.5 years ago and is now moderately tame. if you have had the cat this long then why isn't it your cat. how can she have ownership of a feral cat?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you're going through serious trauma. I think its wonderful you're so caring towards this cat but the woman is clearly unbalanced / unhinged and whatever she says, she is in charge of the cats and deems your home potentially unsafe.

There is nothing you can do. She is not harassing you, its just an unpleasant situation which I hope is over for you very soon. Good luck.

I think you and some other PPs have missed the fact that the OP is a victim of domestic violence (see her first post) and was in a situation where it was temporarily unclear if she had to move out, if the abusive BF was going to move, etc. We don't know what other aspects there are to their relationship. She may have good reason to worry about her safety if her abusive ex-BF finds this post and feels aggrieved that somehow she, and by association, he, has been identiifed so anyone who knows them would recogize the situation. All it would take for one mutual not-so-great friend, who knows OP worked with this rescue charity, to point out that post to the ex-BF, for him to decide to make trouble for OP about it.

So it may not be harassment, which has to be ongoing and sustained, but it IS possibly something which could create real problems for OP. All because this nutty woman who puts animals above humans decided to be a crazy beyotch. It's easy to blame OP and say "You shouldn't have told her so much!" but OP felt this person was giving some sympathy and support and made a mistake. Crazy beyotch charity lady is the one to blame here, and OP should send the certified letter an earlier PP described.

How did I miss her domestic violence when I address it in my first sentence about her GOING THROUGH TRAUMA?
Are you unable to read? Are you completely bone-headed?

Anonymous wrote:Could someone summarize? Way too long and wordy which usually indicates at least 1 hot mess and 1 dumpster fire in progress.

Other PPs have managed to get the gist without needing spoon-feeding.

Yet YOU managed not to read the post and still are able to judge it as a "hot mess" and "dumpster fire"! Amazing, how you can proceed to judge, based on zero actual information. You're amazing!

Anonymous wrote:OP you're going through serious trauma. I think its wonderful you're so caring towards this cat but the woman is clearly unbalanced / unhinged and whatever she says, she is in charge of the cats and deems your home potentially unsafe.

There is nothing you can do. She is not harassing you, its just an unpleasant situation which I hope is over for you very soon. Good luck.

I think you and some other PPs have missed the fact that the OP is a victim of domestic violence (see her first post) and was in a situation where it was temporarily unclear if she had to move out, if the abusive BF was going to move, etc. We don't know what other aspects there are to their relationship. She may have good reason to worry about her safety if her abusive ex-BF finds this post and feels aggrieved that somehow she, and by association, he, has been identiifed so anyone who knows them would recogize the situation. All it would take for one mutual not-so-great friend, who knows OP worked with this rescue charity, to point out that post to the ex-BF, for him to decide to make trouble for OP about it.

So it may not be harassment, which has to be ongoing and sustained, but it IS possibly something which could create real problems for OP. All because this nutty woman who puts animals above humans decided to be a crazy beyotch. It's easy to blame OP and say "You shouldn't have told her so much!" but OP felt this person was giving some sympathy and support and made a mistake. Crazy beyotch charity lady is the one to blame here, and OP should send the certified letter an earlier PP described.

Could someone summarize? Way too long and wordy which usually indicates at least 1 hot mess and 1 dumpster fire in progress.

From this moment forward, please stop over sharing information. Especially, your personal business! It's a business transaction, they're not your friend. Don't ever give some random person intimate details about your life. I'm sorry about your situation and the cat.

I think I understand now. So if the director has a shed full of cats, she doesn't need that cat and it doesn't sound like she officially would adopt it if she's the director. So if it's unadopted and in the shed, I wonder if you could call someone like the landlady and explain you think (Crazy Cat Lady) the Director took your cat and you need to check the shed to retrieve it. Forget that it's a cat for a second. You're basically saying she stole your property. It's not worth the legal fees to sue her unless you are also rich enough to have a lawyer write a threatening letter for $400 to get back a semi feral cat. You can also write to the webmaster or moderator of the website and ask them to delete the message where she reveals the info you don't want out there. But you should print it or take a screenshot first as evidence that this woman is harrassing you. However lawyers and courts don't care about your feelings so I don't think you really need a lawyer. Also it's pretty obvious CCL is projecting her own garbage onto you by claiming you are harrassing her, when she is harrassing you. Or just kill her with kindness, bake her some cat shaped cookies, apologize for your behavior after your relationship problems, reiterate the cat is safe, and give her the application for you to adopt the cat with letters of recommendation from your 3 best friends saying you are a great cat parent and your home is totally safe for cats.

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand how you took the cat to the vet, and didn't get it back. Who took it and did someone else adopt it? If you wanted the cat, then you have to adopt it. Maybe it's too late now. I adopted a foster cat when I thought someone else was going to adopt it. On the other hand, if you believe everything happens for a reason, perhaps you already have enough pets. Can you just ask the vet or the rescue people where the cat is and say if it's not adopted you want it back and you want to adopt it. Otherwise, you may have to let it go. I kind of doubt it would go to a shed. That sounds like your anxiety talking.

And you sound like you didn't read the original post.

I don't understand how you took the cat to the vet, and didn't get it back. Who took it and did someone else adopt it? If you wanted the cat, then you have to adopt it. Maybe it's too late now. I adopted a foster cat when I thought someone else was going to adopt it. On the other hand, if you believe everything happens for a reason, perhaps you already have enough pets. Can you just ask the vet or the rescue people where the cat is and say if it's not adopted you want it back and you want to adopt it. Otherwise, you may have to let it go. I kind of doubt it would go to a shed. That sounds like your anxiety talking.

OP you're going through serious trauma. I think its wonderful you're so caring towards this cat but the woman is clearly unbalanced / unhinged and whatever she says, she is in charge of the cats and deems your home potentially unsafe.

There is nothing you can do. She is not harassing you, its just an unpleasant situation which I hope is over for you very soon. Good luck.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't you think you have more important issues to worry about right now? Not to be harsh, but worrying so much about this cat and this woman's behavior may be a way for you to ignore the big red flags you have flying in your own life. You're 3 weeks post a domestic violence event - take care of yourself first, please!!

Yes, I agree. She posted publicly about the incident and what happened to me though in a very mean and harassing way. She disclosed sensitive details about what I went through and publicly humiliated me. There were enough details that I could be identified. I do have bigger things to worry about, but this is causing emotional distress.

I doubt you have any legal recourse, BUT that doesn't mean you can't ask her to take the post down. But you've got to leave all the emotion out of it. This isn't legal advice, but do a little basic research around privacy laws and defamation of character in your jurisdiction. Then send a letter, certified mail, return receipt requested, through the US mail and tell her she didn't have your permission to share things that were told to her in confidence and strictly in conjunction with you being a volunteer with her program for X number of years. And that the implication that you are not competent to foster is false. You can end with asking her to remove the post in exchange for you not pursuing legal action.

I probably wouldn't do this if she's married to a lawyer or something, but it's otherwise worth a shot.

PS - I am really sorry about the cat.

THIS times a thousand. So many here saying to leave it alone, but if there are details which could identify you -- even if no one you know is likely to find and read this specific post -- I would do what the PP above suggests. Especially this: You can end with asking her to remove the post in exchange for you not pursuing legal action. Don't bring up anything else, not the way she took the cat from you, not the "hoarding shed" etc., but focus only on the fact there is a post with identifiable details about you, a domestic violence victim. Were cops ever involved in your home situation with the now-ex-BF? If so I would let her know that police are aware of your home situation and you will notify them and retain an attorney if the post does not disappear within, say, 24 hours. Of course the cops won't actually get involved, I know that. But SHE won't necessarily know that, and often, the mere threat and use of terms like "attorney" and "police" and "legal action" are enough to scare someone off. I agree with you and the PP above that a post with identifying details is a bridge too far. This woman is awful. (And you, OP, are NOT anyone's "hot mess"--sorry some PPs here are such jerks.)

Sadly I think you need to let everything else go, even the fact she has this "hoarding shed" of locked-up animals. You need to focus on yourself, not animal rescue, right now.

I hope you are safe from your ex-BF. That is the key thing right now. No animals come before your safety and peace of mind.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't you think you have more important issues to worry about right now? Not to be harsh, but worrying so much about this cat and this woman's behavior may be a way for you to ignore the big red flags you have flying in your own life. You're 3 weeks post a domestic violence event - take care of yourself first, please!!

Yes, I agree. She posted publicly about the incident and what happened to me though in a very mean and harassing way. She disclosed sensitive details about what I went through and publicly humiliated me. There were enough details that I could be identified. I do have bigger things to worry about, but this is causing emotional distress.

I doubt you have any legal recourse, BUT that doesn't mean you can't ask her to take the post down. But you've got to leave all the emotion out of it. This isn't legal advice, but do a little basic research around privacy laws and defamation of character in your jurisdiction. Then send a letter, certified mail, return receipt requested, through the US mail and tell her she didn't have your permission to share things that were told to her in confidence and strictly in conjunction with you being a volunteer with her program for X number of years. And that the implication that you are not competent to foster is false. You can end with asking her to remove the post in exchange for you not pursuing legal action.

I probably wouldn't do this if she's married to a lawyer or something, but it's otherwise worth a shot.

PS - I am really sorry about the cat.