I have a million dietary restrictions and carry laminated cards with a list of everything I can’t have. I call the restaurant ahead of time to see if this will be an issue. 9/10 times they pass me a long to a manager or chef. 9/10 times that person says to ask for them when I arrive. I give the person the laminated card that they keep with my order in the kitchen.


If a mistake is made and I am with a group I write it off as mistake and simply tell them my stomach is upset or I am not as hungry as I thought so I don’t draw more attention or have to explain to the group what the issue is and ask for box. If I am with DH, he will typically say I don’t won’t to be a pain, but it appears they added xyz to the dish and that was on the list we provided, if it can’t be made without that no big deal we will just take the meals to go, or can she get the dish with xyz. Never have they not remade the dish.

I know I am a pain to restaurants. We tip 40-60% at places that accommodate us and I always write a personal thank you note or email to the manager or chef. They frequently respond say that we are welcome back anytime and ask that we book future reservations directly through them along with trying to make sure we have the same server every time.

Never would I not tip a server for a mistake that is most likely made by the kitchen. I would tip and discuss with the manager prior to leaving. Or if with a group I would ask for manager on the way out and say hi my name is Buffy can I have your card I would like to email you about my experience. Then send the email the minute I walk in the door.

Anonymous wrote:Probably next time you should let the server know exactly what you want. She probably forgot to write down no salt or seasonings. I would have asked her to cancel the order.

OP did tell the server exactly what she wanted.

Eating out when you have food restrictions is hard. Not preferences, restrictions. I don’t know where all this judgement is coming from.
OP was able to have her dietary needs met at this restaurant before, so had no reason not to think things wouldn’t work out. OP was courteous to dining companions. OP was asking for help on how to do this better next time.

Having different suggestions for OP is fine. No ne needs to be nasty about it.

I would have sent it back. The restaurant can’t fix it if you don’t state the problem.

I would have sent it back and asked for it to be cooked the way I asked.

I would just order a drink and maybe a salad, the rest is too complicated imho. Even pasta is boiled in salty water

Anonymous wrote:So, is this how their chicken comes or you made the grill from the scratch, give me a baked potato and saute some veggie up yourself. You how no idea how difficult your seemingly simple request possibly is for a restaurant, but it depends on the restaurant.
You are the customer who I wish would stay home, drank only, eat your own food or order from the manager. The server could not make it happen for you. They wish they could have. Not in their power. So, not only did they get a customer like you and can remember you for day and days, they didn't make any money. Money actually is not a such a big deal. As a sever, I would pay you to stay home. I would also push some new server to deal with you the next time you walk in.
Restaurant are not just places to offer any food. The chef has created dishes which they hope customers enjoy. You make your own non-salty food at home. Long story short, kitchen told the server to go to hell and you gave him no money towards the trip.

Agree. I always say that the 4 most damaging words to the food service industry were “Have it your way.” No, if you go to a restaurant, you should be prepared to enjoy what they offer, not ask for your own endlessly customized meal.

Anonymous wrote:A couple of kids in my family have severe life-threatening food allergies and just never go to restaurants. It's sad for their parents who don't get out much, but this thread makes me understand why. OP, sorry but a minimum-wage-earning server is not going to be an expert on medical food restrictions.

Anyone in a service job at least needs to know what they don't know and have a rule for handling that (shut things down if there's no capacity/tolerance, go back to someone for information or help). And not be a total blank when an order they accepted and sent in isn't the order that came out, whatever the reason. These are table stakes.

Anonymous wrote:So, is this how their chicken comes or you made the grill from the scratch, give me a baked potato and saute some veggie up yourself. You how no idea how difficult your seemingly simple request possibly is for a restaurant, but it depends on the restaurant.
You are the customer who I wish would stay home, drank only, eat your own food or order from the manager. The server could not make it happen for you. They wish they could have. Not in their power. So, not only did they get a customer like you and can remember you for day and days, they didn't make any money. Money actually is not a such a big deal. As a sever, I would pay you to stay home. I would also push some new server to deal with you the next time you walk in.
Restaurant are not just places to offer any food. The chef has created dishes which they hope customers enjoy. You make your own non-salty food at home. Long story short, kitchen told the server to go to hell and you gave him no money towards the trip.

So dude, the key here would be for you to communicate this and then not accept an order you can't and won't fulfill. Be a jackass upfront, especially if you believe in your reasons and understand the limitations. Do not string someone along, especially when someone has told you they medical reasons. Surely restaurant staff are trained to be sensitive this exists and competently handle that however the restaurant wishes (including some polite declinations or warnings).

I think salad is the only safe low salt choice when eating out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Asking a cook in a restaurant to make something without seasoning or salt is asking a lot. A lot of stuff is prepped before and /or cooked on the same surface. You should be gracious when it is done correctly. Plus, it sounds like the cook got it wrong. How would the server know without tasting it? Why did you not politely send it back, explaining you could not eat it due to health problems? I get you were upset, but by not tipping you just made that restaurant less likely to try to provide altered meals. That sever in the future will likely just say “ sorry, we cannot do that.’

I am sorry that you are ill.

The server should have let OP know in advance that they could not accommodate her request in that case.

This.

Given the server's complete blank response (as shared by you), your not tipping makes sense. The rest of your party, I presume, tipped.

And yeah, the manager should be able to help with something like this. And there are certainly ways in my mind to pursue this - without being angry, however justifiably frustrated (and hangry!) you might've been. And I'm sorry this much extra work would seem to be on you given your condition.

The server should have known what was possible, or at least known what they didn't know, and known to not be "blank" when things were clearly produced not to what you requested that they accepted as a request with the implication it'd be fulfilled.

That's called bad service.

Good service could have included accurate information for your expectations for you decide what to order or ultimately, maybe, to order at all... and then you'd tip on what you ordered and got that met that expectation.

Anonymous wrote:Asking a cook in a restaurant to make something without seasoning or salt is asking a lot. A lot of stuff is prepped before and /or cooked on the same surface. You should be gracious when it is done correctly. Plus, it sounds like the cook got it wrong. How would the server know without tasting it? Why did you not politely send it back, explaining you could not eat it due to health problems? I get you were upset, but by not tipping you just made that restaurant less likely to try to provide altered meals. That sever in the future will likely just say “ sorry, we cannot do that.’

I am sorry that you are ill.

The server should have let OP know in advance that they could not accommodate her request in that case.

So, is this how their chicken comes or you made the grill from the scratch, give me a baked potato and saute some veggie up yourself. You how no idea how difficult your seemingly simple request possibly is for a restaurant, but it depends on the restaurant.
You are the customer who I wish would stay home, drank only, eat your own food or order from the manager. The server could not make it happen for you. They wish they could have. Not in their power. So, not only did they get a customer like you and can remember you for day and days, they didn't make any money. Money actually is not a such a big deal. As a sever, I would pay you to stay home. I would also push some new server to deal with you the next time you walk in.
Restaurant are not just places to offer any food. The chef has created dishes which they hope customers enjoy. You make your own non-salty food at home. Long story short, kitchen told the server to go to hell and you gave him no money towards the trip.

A couple of kids in my family have severe life-threatening food allergies and just never go to restaurants. It's sad for their parents who don't get out much, but this thread makes me understand why. OP, sorry but a minimum-wage-earning server is not going to be an expert on medical food restrictions.

Anonymous wrote:Probably next time you should let the server know exactly what you want. She probably forgot to write down no salt or seasonings. I would have asked her to cancel the order.

Or she wrote it down and the kitchen mucked it up. She's tired of taking the hit for the understaffed kitchen so that's why you got the blank stare. She had no more effs to give.

You were smart to pay for and pack up the food for your friend and not send anything back. Like a PP said, then just have a quick go-to if you are starving that you know they can get quickly, can't mess up, so you can at least eat something. And since you are going out for the company, obviously and not the food, maybe keep some snacks in your purse.