Anonymous
05/08/2023 02:46
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
No one, and I repeat NO ONE will accept that job. Maybe if she paid $50 to tolerate her ugly and controlling attitude .
I feel sorry for that kid.
I feel sorry for that kid.
Anonymous
05/08/2023 02:44
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
Your friend is crazy. She needs to see a psychologist and probably a psychiatrist.
She can hire a pt nanny and pt nannies usually are paid higher. No one wants a pt job.
Maybe get an au pair that will obey every order from that psycho woman.
Your friend has trust issues. Baby can't sleep in stroller?? Well...SOMETIMES THE BABY HAPPENS TO SLEEP IN THE STROLLER. They are NOT ROBOTS. Schedules changes, babies changes and that is NORMAL.
Your friend is not normal
She can hire a pt nanny and pt nannies usually are paid higher. No one wants a pt job.
Maybe get an au pair that will obey every order from that psycho woman.
Your friend has trust issues. Baby can't sleep in stroller?? Well...SOMETIMES THE BABY HAPPENS TO SLEEP IN THE STROLLER. They are NOT ROBOTS. Schedules changes, babies changes and that is NORMAL.
Your friend is not normal
Anonymous
05/07/2023 10:12
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
Mom needs therapy for PPA. Those asks are controlling and anxiety-driven.
Alternatively, she should just hire a nanny for PT childcare while she rests. This only makes sense if there is clear on-duty and off-duty times: So nanny has baby from 9-11, then mom from 11-1 while nanny does chores.
But really, some of the asks are just not going to be tenable for any childcare- particularly, forbidding naps in the stroller, no walks alone, no solids.
Alternatively, she should just hire a nanny for PT childcare while she rests. This only makes sense if there is clear on-duty and off-duty times: So nanny has baby from 9-11, then mom from 11-1 while nanny does chores.
But really, some of the asks are just not going to be tenable for any childcare- particularly, forbidding naps in the stroller, no walks alone, no solids.
Anonymous
05/07/2023 10:04
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:A friend is unhappy with her nanny but the search to find a new one has been insane. I've been talking with her about it but I can't offer that much more insight are these normal tasks/asks
Pay is $27.50/hr after taxes
1 baby girl
Tasks-
developmentally appropriate activities and planning an activity once a day 3x a week - sensory bin, art.
Clean big Toys/sterilize pacifiers once a month/daily tidy especially of toys going in the mouth/teethers. Can run in DW
Load bottles in DW
Stay on top of baby laundry
Keep nursery tidy, no heavy cleaning but wiping down the changing table once a day, keep it stocked, notify if running low on things
Put baby schedule first, keep routine
Asks- friend knows some are not the norm
Mom stays home, will accompany on most walks, once comfortable can discuss solo walks but no napping in the stroller
Only mom and dad will feed baby solids
No playdates
Mom will take baby to classes on the weekend or while nanny is taking care of laundry/tidying nursery/having a break
Basically my friend realizes from interviewing that most nannies want free reign and autonomy to do what they would like throughout the day and see who they want. But she doesn't want that dynamic and is very very overprotective. They need help because of her health needs/she needs a lot of rest right now.
The “tasks” are perfectly acceptable and should be expected for the rate she is offering.
The “asks”… are definitely not normal. She might be able to find someone, but it’s going to be work. Maybe a younger sitter who is more amenable to taking direction. Or an mom who doesn’t have legal employment options. Or an Au pair if that’s a route she wants to explore.
I think the deeper issue is that this mom has issues delegating the care of her child to someone else. I get it - I always felt that no one else could care for my child as well as I could. For me, it stemmed from guilt - being a working mom. Our nannies were perfectly capable and fine and yet my own guilt of not raising my own kids ate me up. I eventually became a SAHM. I’m so much happier doing it myself. I realized it was a “me” issue and not a “them” issue. I think your friend has the same problem.
Anonymous
05/07/2023 02:32
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
$100 dollars per hour
Anonymous
05/07/2023 02:31
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
For all that insanity terms, overprotective parent...
Pay the nanny $50 per hour
Pay the nanny $50 per hour
Anonymous
05/06/2023 19:34
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
The baby should be doing art and a sensory bin? Mom goes on all walks? Baby cannot sleep on walks?
Mom sounds nuts. And doesn’t sound like she’s going to get a lot of “working” done by taking part in all those activities. Your “friend” needs to get a grip.
Mom sounds nuts. And doesn’t sound like she’s going to get a lot of “working” done by taking part in all those activities. Your “friend” needs to get a grip.
Anonymous
05/06/2023 11:46
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
Poor baby. That mom is not letting the child to breathe!
Children needs to socialize, sometimes it happens the kid sleeps in the stroller, there's no perfection on a child's schedule! That mom needs to let it go, her child will go to 1st grade someday, you can't be with them 24/7.
Again poor baby and nanny. Your awful friend is not letting your nanny and baby make a connection.
Children needs to socialize, sometimes it happens the kid sleeps in the stroller, there's no perfection on a child's schedule! That mom needs to let it go, her child will go to 1st grade someday, you can't be with them 24/7.
Again poor baby and nanny. Your awful friend is not letting your nanny and baby make a connection.
Anonymous
05/06/2023 11:41
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
The nannies are with the children all day, they know what is best. If you act bossy, micromanaging them then it's best you the parent take care of your child 24/7.
Your best solution.
Your best solution.
Anonymous
05/06/2023 11:40
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
Your friend is scaring the nannies AWAY hahaha 😆
I have to be honest. Nannies likes to be like moms, no one micromanaging them, they know your child needs by just being with them, not you because you are hiring a nanny. Therefore the nanny knows what is best for the baby. They do laundry and dishes, that is obvious.
But please wash your dishes from last night. It disturbs nannies work. Some parents don't care if their child has spoons for the next day.
I have to be honest. Nannies likes to be like moms, no one micromanaging them, they know your child needs by just being with them, not you because you are hiring a nanny. Therefore the nanny knows what is best for the baby. They do laundry and dishes, that is obvious.
But please wash your dishes from last night. It disturbs nannies work. Some parents don't care if their child has spoons for the next day.
Anonymous
05/04/2023 07:44
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
Your friend is one of those first time moms who doesn’t realize how quickly the baby’s needs will change. 3 naps per day is a short phase. I wouldn’t mention anything about pacifiers bc that will also end soon. Even the wording with these minute details would make most run. I’ve been a wfh parent with a nanny for years but if I had said I’d micromanage like this, I’d never have found someone. Mom will go on walks with the nanny? Just no!
Anonymous
05/04/2023 07:32
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
This position wouldn't be for me but I could see others applying. I agree with maybe changing the title to a mother's helper. The rate seems fine, especially if for full-time care and guaranteed 52 weeks a year salary.
Anonymous
04/28/2023 23:12
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:Tell your friend to quit her job and raise her kid herself.
Did you even read the OP?
Anonymous
04/28/2023 21:47
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:A friend is unhappy with her nanny but the search to find a new one has been insane. I've been talking with her about it but I can't offer that much more insight are these normal tasks/asks
Pay is $27.50/hr after taxes
1 baby girl
Tasks-
developmentally appropriate activities and planning an activity once a day 3x a week - sensory bin, art.
Clean big Toys/sterilize pacifiers once a month/daily tidy especially of toys going in the mouth/teethers. Can run in DW
Load bottles in DW
Stay on top of baby laundry
Keep nursery tidy, no heavy cleaning but wiping down the changing table once a day, keep it stocked, notify if running low on things
Put baby schedule first, keep routine
Asks- friend knows some are not the norm
Mom stays home, will accompany on most walks, once comfortable can discuss solo walks but no napping in the stroller
Only mom and dad will feed baby solids
No playdates
Mom will take baby to classes on the weekend or while nanny is taking care of laundry/tidying nursery/having a break
Basically my friend realizes from interviewing that most nannies want free reign and autonomy to do what they would like throughout the day and see who they want. But she doesn't want that dynamic and is very very overprotective. They need help because of her health needs/she needs a lot of rest right now.
Okay, she has several options:
1. Advertise for a housekeeper who can hold the baby during the few times mom needs to have a break.
2. Advertise for a mother's helper role, an adult who has no experience with children and who will be happy to listen to everything mom says.
3. Advertise for a nanny and be clear that it's an on call position. Nanny must be in the house during her hours, but once the baby tasks are done, if mom stills has the baby, nanny can sit and read or watch tv.
4. Advertise for a nanny and be clear that there are no walks, playdates, or classes. Nanny does not need to drive or leave the house during the day. Nanny will have autonomy within the house and will have plenty of time to do the baby-related tasks while mom takes the baby for walks and classes.
Anonymous
04/28/2023 10:42
Subject: Is this unreasonable?
The tasks are fine, the micromanagement is not. She wants a mother's helper, not a nanny.