Anonymous wrote:It's not all roses.
Grandmas can be old fashioned, stubborn, and think their way of doing things is better than yours especiallywhen it comes to raising kids.. There might be a lot more strife behind closed doors than you think.

Free childcare means no complaints from you.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, normal in immigrant circles. Grandma is young enough to do that. DCUM types prefer to wait until they’re 40 to have kids, and at that point their parents are 75+. To each his own.

My mom was early 20s when she had me, I had my son at 31 and grandma is still working at 60. It doesn't matter about age unless you have wealth or grandmom who never worked and therefore is available.

Anonymous wrote:My parents live in their own home but they help us a lot with childcare and cooking. It is a win-win-win situation for us, them, and the kids. But I know others would not like it. I fully intend to pay it forward for my own children.

Are you going to respond in kind when your parents are older and need help or are you just ignore them and complain?

Anonymous wrote:My DD's friend has her immigrant grandmother living with them, taking the kids to school, picking the kids up, taking the kids to the playground, etc....OMG I'm so jealous, she probably cooks too.

She also treats her grandmother with respect and love. She probably doesn't complain if grandma isn't perfect and let's the kids eat things she normally doesn't allow are you getting the picture?

I know people who treat their parents so disrespectfully it is shocking but still complain when they do help.

How do you treat your grandmother or mother?

I am White but when my Grandfather died my Grandmother moved in with us until she sadly passed about a decade later.

It was amazing. I spent most of my childhood and early teen years with her. She had her own little suite and kept busy with her personal activities but was still very involved.

Anonymous wrote:My husband did that. Downside is he loves his parents in a friendly but kind of distant way but he adored his grandma. He was much, much closer to her than to his parents. His mom has mentioned feeling sad about that. I’m not familiar with enough adults who grew up with that arrangement to know how typical it is.

That is typical from what I have seen. I think the moms tend to think they will have that relationship with their own grandchildren.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DD's friend has her immigrant grandmother living with them, taking the kids to school, picking the kids up, taking the kids to the playground, etc....OMG I'm so jealous, she probably cooks too.

This was me growing up. I loved it! My grandma was amazing and I was her world. Thinking about her unconditional love still brings a slime to my face. I wish my children could have met her.

Slime?

Anonymous wrote:My DD's friend has her immigrant grandmother living with them, taking the kids to school, picking the kids up, taking the kids to the playground, etc....OMG I'm so jealous, she probably cooks too.

This was me growing up. I loved it! My grandma was amazing and I was her world. Thinking about her unconditional love still brings a slime to my face. I wish my children could have met her.

As a grandma I have done pickup and drop offs for my grandsons and enjoy doing it. My daughter had her wisdom teeth taken out 3 weeks ago and I was more than happy to take the boys to school and pick them up for the weekend make them food till there dad got home. Being there to help is something I love to do for my daughter but also because I love seeing my grandsons.

Our 11 year old grandson will only let my husband his grandpa take him to the barber .

Immigrant or not, it can be great for all parties concerned when kids have loving and involved grandparents. Great way to model functional adult relationships. That's only if all the adults get along, though.

Anonymous wrote:It's not all roses.
Grandmas can be old fashioned, stubborn, and think their way of doing things is better than yours especiallywhen it comes to raising kids.. There might be a lot more strife behind closed doors than you think.

+1000

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you never met an Asian family?

No but do they have to deal with all the cultural idiosyncrasies as well like farting loud chewing

No. Everyone knows only Americans fart.

Anonymous wrote:Have you never met an Asian family?

My parents have zero interest in being full-time babysitters. They are happy to visit but are otherwise busy enjoying their retirement.

It's not all roses.
Grandmas can be old fashioned, stubborn, and think their way of doing things is better than yours especiallywhen it comes to raising kids.. There might be a lot more strife behind closed doors than you think.