Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids have a hyphenated last name. It is a total of 9 letters so not too long. It has never once been an issue on planes, school, doctors office and whatever other parade of horribles people like to trot out. Many of their friends also have hyphenated last names and it’s not a big deal at all.

I was reminded that this was the right thing to do when I driving DS and his teen friend around and the friend was saying, yeah my mom’s last name is X, she doesn’t have the same name as the rest of us.

Funny I am proud to have kept my last name and my daughter has no plans to change hers. If someone uses DH last name for me..I am fine with that. I do not correct kids or people who I do not have a relationship with.

Same.

Anonymous wrote:My kids have a hyphenated last name. It is a total of 9 letters so not too long. It has never once been an issue on planes, school, doctors office and whatever other parade of horribles people like to trot out. Many of their friends also have hyphenated last names and it’s not a big deal at all.

I was reminded that this was the right thing to do when I driving DS and his teen friend around and the friend was saying, yeah my mom’s last name is X, she doesn’t have the same name as the rest of us.

So a casual observation by a child made you think you were right. Got it. Good logic and reasoning skills you have.

Nearly every friend and family member who has two last names hates it and finds it an inconvenience in a country where one is the norm. It would be fine if you planned to live in Latin America where two is the norm. But even Latin American couples who settle in the US and have kids here usually opt not to burden their kids with two last names. It's just so inconvenient.

Anonymous wrote:Serious question- would you want to go through life with that last name? Every time you say or write your name you have to do both?

Just put yours as a middle name.

Or DH's as the middle name.

My kids also have my last name as their “middle” name. But actually their birth certificates in DC just say “name” and there is no distinction between first/middle/last so I guess it could be a double barrel last name with no middle name. My last name is important for my professional life but I always sign my name with both last names when I do things for my kids’ school or activities. I also don’t make a big deal out of people calling me by their last name.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids have a hyphenated last name. It is a total of 9 letters so not too long. It has never once been an issue on planes, school, doctors office and whatever other parade of horribles people like to trot out. Many of their friends also have hyphenated last names and it’s not a big deal at all.

I was reminded that this was the right thing to do when I driving DS and his teen friend around and the friend was saying, yeah my mom’s last name is X, she doesn’t have the same name as the rest of us.

Funny I am proud to have kept my last name and my daughter has no plans to change hers. If someone uses DH last name for me..I am fine with that. I do not correct kids or people who I do not have a relationship with.

I’m the PP and I am also proud to have kept my name, never had any plans to change it. My kids think it’s normal. Personally I did not like the idea that everyone else in the family has one name and the mom has a different name, so I felt strongly about hyphenating. When the kids are adults they are free to drop one name, keep both, whatever they want to do.

Al my kids have my maiden name as their middle name. It really worked for us though because my maiden name is an acceptable first name (think Madison, McKenzie, Quinn) and we had all girls.

I personally would not do a cumbersome double barreled last name

My childhood friend had a hyphenated last name. She dropped her dad's name when he left the family when she was a tween.

Combine the two and create a new name?

I traded my 5 letter maiden name for an 11 letter last name. It’s long to type - compounded by my company’s email address also being a long company name. I also have to explain how to spell it.

I have a double middle name - my original middle name and my maiden name, joined with a hyphen. This has been really seamless. It’s rare that I have to write or spell my whole name and my middle initial didn’t change.

Professionally, many people know me as First Maiden Last name. Legally that’s not really my name, but it flows well linguistically.

I wanted to keep my birth name but also share DHs name. Hyphenating would have resulted in connecting two ethnic names for a total of 17 letters. I opted instead to just add DHs name, making my birth name a second middle name. It’s worked for me for almost 22 years. My suggestion would be to use your name as a middle name…they’ll have it, without the potential mess of a hyphen.

Anonymous wrote:My kids have a hyphenated last name. It is a total of 9 letters so not too long. It has never once been an issue on planes, school, doctors office and whatever other parade of horribles people like to trot out. Many of their friends also have hyphenated last names and it’s not a big deal at all.

I was reminded that this was the right thing to do when I driving DS and his teen friend around and the friend was saying, yeah my mom’s last name is X, she doesn’t have the same name as the rest of us.

Funny I am proud to have kept my last name and my daughter has no plans to change hers. If someone uses DH last name for me..I am fine with that. I do not correct kids or people who I do not have a relationship with.

Anonymous wrote:My kids have a hyphenated last name. It is a total of 9 letters so not too long. It has never once been an issue on planes, school, doctors office and whatever other parade of horribles people like to trot out. Many of their friends also have hyphenated last names and it’s not a big deal at all.

I was reminded that this was the right thing to do when I driving DS and his teen friend around and the friend was saying, yeah my mom’s last name is X, she doesn’t have the same name as the rest of us.

I think it depends on the names. I posted above I wish I hadn’t done it for myself. The last two letters of my name and the first two of his name are the same. So a lot of places can’t handle a hyphen or even two names with no hyphen, so they end up squishing the names into one long name. So it reads like xxxxababxxx and that looks weird. People can’t read it. But maybe if I had a different combo of letters, it would be less unwieldy.

I love it in theory, but know people who grew up with this, and chose to drop it as adults because it’s overly complicated from an administrative standpoint.

So, no.

DW and I did this when naming our children. It's annoying. Would not do again.