Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What school district? If this is FCPS, I'd request a meeting with the principal and break out the regulations. Being removed from the table seems like a level 2 sanction. I'd ask what made this a level 2 violation and demand to see the paperwork. Basically, I'd try to waste as much of their time as I could because I'm petty

No. Her kid broke a rule and will have a consequence. This is life. Better to learn now than later.

OP here... I don't disagree that they should have a consequence. I just think it's a bit extreme. They are serving their punishment (lol sounds like prison) over lunch today. I'm not intervening, but I do disagree with the punishment. But I disagree with any punishment meant to embarrass or shame.

All punishments embarrass or shame. So basically schools should be a free for all.

no they do not. isolation is especially cruel

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What school district? If this is FCPS, I'd request a meeting with the principal and break out the regulations. Being removed from the table seems like a level 2 sanction. I'd ask what made this a level 2 violation and demand to see the paperwork. Basically, I'd try to waste as much of their time as I could because I'm petty

No. Her kid broke a rule and will have a consequence. This is life. Better to learn now than later.

OP here... I don't disagree that they should have a consequence. I just think it's a bit extreme. They are serving their punishment (lol sounds like prison) over lunch today. I'm not intervening, but I do disagree with the punishment. But I disagree with any punishment meant to embarrass or shame.

All punishments embarrass or shame. So basically schools should be a free for all.

Anonymous wrote:On one thread we complain about schools not imposing any discipline, not holding kids accountable, not having consequences. But when the school tries, it’s ok for everyone else’s child but not mine. My kid is good. It’s a first offense. It’s not developmentally appropriate. No wonder schools can’t make headway with disciplinary issues.

Your kid knows the rules. Your kid broke the rules. There is a known consequence for breaking the rules. But she’s so sad so she should get a pass.

If it were my kid, I’d tell them not to talk at lunch again so they don’t get removed.

I didn't say they should get a pass. I disagree with the stringency of the punishment, but I'm not calling the school to complain or get them out of it. Nowhere did I say that they should get a pass.

And I did tell them, "you made a mistake, now you have a consequence, hopefully this will remind you to follow the rules in the future"

I can disagree with the punishment without intervening. In all likelihood, we will never deal with this situation again because as I said DC is a well behaved kid.

So don't act like you know what was or wasn't said.

^ Even my tough guy kid would have been upset if he knew he had to go to school and sit separately from everyone, like on display as the "bad kid."

This is not an appropriate punishment and lunch should not be like this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your concern is valid. This not developmentally appropriate and very punishing. I would complain.

I messaged the teacher to let her know that DC would probably be off today and why. I mean DC was sobbing when I left for work, so I hope they calmed down before dad took them to school.

I disapprove of the punishment but this is incredibly overdramatic for something so minor. You sure DC isn’t picking up on your feelings? Surely he has been reprimanded at school or daycare at some point before? Even with the most well behaved kids things happen.

Op here. Of course they haven't been perfect and have been reprimanded in the past. I think they were just really embarrassed by the consequence which was making them more upset. It's one thing to get reprimanded/corrected in the moment, it's another to have an embarrassing consequence that singles them out the next day. It stretches out the whole situation much longer than it needs to.

I didn't say anything to upset them or even that it was unfair. I just said that I understood why they were upset and I wasn't upset with them, but they made a mistake and this was the consequence the school determined.

On one thread we complain about schools not imposing any discipline, not holding kids accountable, not having consequences. But when the school tries, it’s ok for everyone else’s child but not mine. My kid is good. It’s a first offense. It’s not developmentally appropriate. No wonder schools can’t make headway with disciplinary issues.

Your kid knows the rules. Your kid broke the rules. There is a known consequence for breaking the rules. But she’s so sad so she should get a pass.

If it were my kid, I’d tell them not to talk at lunch again so they don’t get removed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What school district? If this is FCPS, I'd request a meeting with the principal and break out the regulations. Being removed from the table seems like a level 2 sanction. I'd ask what made this a level 2 violation and demand to see the paperwork. Basically, I'd try to waste as much of their time as I could because I'm petty

No. Her kid broke a rule and will have a consequence. This is life. Better to learn now than later.

OP here... I don't disagree that they should have a consequence. I just think it's a bit extreme. They are serving their punishment (lol sounds like prison) over lunch today. I'm not intervening, but I do disagree with the punishment. But I disagree with any punishment meant to embarrass or shame.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your concern is valid. This not developmentally appropriate and very punishing. I would complain.

I messaged the teacher to let her know that DC would probably be off today and why. I mean DC was sobbing when I left for work, so I hope they calmed down before dad took them to school.

I disapprove of the punishment but this is incredibly overdramatic for something so minor. You sure DC isn’t picking up on your feelings? Surely he has been reprimanded at school or daycare at some point before? Even with the most well behaved kids things happen.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What school district? If this is FCPS, I'd request a meeting with the principal and break out the regulations. Being removed from the table seems like a level 2 sanction. I'd ask what made this a level 2 violation and demand to see the paperwork. Basically, I'd try to waste as much of their time as I could because I'm petty

No. Her kid broke a rule and will have a consequence. This is life. Better to learn now than later.

People are questioning if the punishment is appropriate. Spoiler: it isn't.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What school district? If this is FCPS, I'd request a meeting with the principal and break out the regulations. Being removed from the table seems like a level 2 sanction. I'd ask what made this a level 2 violation and demand to see the paperwork. Basically, I'd try to waste as much of their time as I could because I'm petty

Okay, but never complain that the school employees are not spending time teaching your kid or grading papers quickly enough when you feel it’s fine for you (and presumably every other parent) to waste their time.

Sorry no. In our 6 years at our FCPS elementary, we had some questionable things happen, but the only time I ever intervened and complained was over lunch. They had a dragon lady lunch aide who made lunch tortuous. I finally called the principal after I witnessed her making fun of a kid's accent. I wish I had called earlier, because there was absolutely no reason for lunch to be such a chore for the kids. She was implementing similar punishments...isolating kids, etc. After she was spoken to, lunch became much more relaxed for the kids, not something they dread.

OP, I think you should talk to the principal and find out what the general rules are and assess the situation for all kids and see if it can be improved.

Anonymous wrote:What school district? If this is FCPS, I'd request a meeting with the principal and break out the regulations. Being removed from the table seems like a level 2 sanction. I'd ask what made this a level 2 violation and demand to see the paperwork. Basically, I'd try to waste as much of their time as I could because I'm petty

No. Her kid broke a rule and will have a consequence. This is life. Better to learn now than later.

Anonymous wrote:Your concern is valid. This not developmentally appropriate and very punishing. I would complain.

I messaged the teacher to let her know that DC would probably be off today and why. I mean DC was sobbing when I left for work, so I hope they calmed down before dad took them to school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why in the world are they not allowed to talk at lunch????

They are in school all day. Let them be kids for 30 min FFS. I have an issue with the whole rule to begin with so I'd start there.

Some punishments are valid and I would support the school in enforcing it. This one I would have a hard time with because 1) he should not be in trouble for talking in the first place 2) yes, he should not be publicly shamed for it. GFC

Schools not letting kids be kids again. Then they wonder why some act out when they're suppressed all day

THIS! (OP here)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why in the world are they not allowed to talk at lunch????

They are in school all day. Let them be kids for 30 min FFS. I have an issue with the whole rule to begin with so I'd start there.

Some punishments are valid and I would support the school in enforcing it. This one I would have a hard time with because 1) he should not be in trouble for talking in the first place 2) yes, he should not be publicly shamed for it. GFC

OP here. Yes I definitely support consequences, this just seems extreme, that's why I'm not super happy. I guess they'd gotten the "privilege" of talking at lunch taken away for being too loud and were supposed to not talk and DC "forgot" and talked and this is the punishment.

I'm the one you're responding to and I understand. I just think kids need to be able to let loose for a few minutes and not be "on" the whole damn day. So if the cafeteria gets too loud maybe tell them to bring the volume down instead of preventing them from speaking at all. but get what you're saying. I'd have a problem with him sitting alone as punishment too.

OP here, I fully agree. DC was crying too basically saying that's one of the only times they get to talk with friends all day. Broke my heart. If this was a kid that has constant behavior issues, fine... maybe?? But this is a really well behaved, good kid and I just think this is too much.

Anonymous wrote:What school district? If this is FCPS, I'd request a meeting with the principal and break out the regulations. Being removed from the table seems like a level 2 sanction. I'd ask what made this a level 2 violation and demand to see the paperwork. Basically, I'd try to waste as much of their time as I could because I'm petty

Okay, but never complain that the school employees are not spending time teaching your kid or grading papers quickly enough when you feel it’s fine for you (and presumably every other parent) to waste their time.