If you don't like what's for dinner you can have some combo of fruit/yogurt/cereal/pb&j that you make yourself. I only serve one meal and I do my best to please everyone but if not, my kids know how to handle it. By now all of my kids help out cooking on a pretty regular basis so they get more of a vote in what we make but there are still times when someone grabs a bowl of cornflakes. As long as they are at the table, that's all I care about.

Adults have permission to have food preferences, so why do we expect kids to like everything they are served?

Choose from what is on the table. If I'm making something that I know will be problematic for one kid, I make sure there's enough other stuff on the table to fill them up.

When they were young I made a point that they shouldn't refuse a food based on looks or fear of unknown. They could refuse a dish if, for example, it was clearly full of mushrooms and the kid had a long-term aversion to mushrooms. But to refuse to try something just because it was different/unknown was not ok with me. They have pretty much internalized that and I don't really have to fight that fight anymore.

Kids are teens now. One is naturally more picky, has a lot of foods that he's not a fan of (including some of typical kid-friendly foods), but he's polite about it and always finds something to eat. Prefers milder flavors, and with braces has to be careful about textures. The other is naturally more adventurous and prefers strong flavors, but has a few items (like mushrooms) that are totally off limits. Both are fine, there's no one right answer here.

My 11 and 13 yr old are mostly good eaters. My 6 yr old is picky. I make her at least try what I made for dinner. The she can have bread with peanut butter, fruit, or cheese if she doesn’t want what I made. This isn’t a hardship to get for her, she eats, it is heathy and I’m not getting into a major power struggle over food. But I do hope she will eat food I made for dinner eventually

I work full time and work hard to cook a home made meal that is packed with nutrients. Everyone in my daily knows to shut up and eat up. I think I’ve fielded maybe 3 complaints and they learned real quick to appreciate what I do or they can cook it themselves. It only took me snatching up one plate, dumping it in the trash and telling my son he could make his own meal and they all fell in line.

So freaking disrespectful to complain and make demands when someone is trying to proved healthy meals. If you wouldn’t do it as a guest don’t do it at our table.

I still take people in consideration. I can tell if a meal does not go over well and have scrapped plenty from the rotation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They sit down with us, they try everything, they eat what they can, they don’t complain. No alternative choices.

They have turned out to be polite and non-picky eaters. While my son would have gone this way if we had let him, he always finds something he can eat wherever we go.

I detest picky children who are indulged. The only thing worse is picky adults, who are just big, ill-mannered children themselves. Never made to grow up. Unless you have an actual diagnosed issue .

I detest parents who think they have such control over their kids to make them into a certain type of eater. I prefer a relaxed pleasant family meal time where no one is forced to gag on their peas because mom insists everyone must eat peas.

I don't force them to eat anything. But I don't make them anything else if they don't. Do you understand? Dinners are very relaxed and fun. Much more relaxed than those with picky children being waited on by their short-order cook mothers!

Anonymous wrote:I have ridden out the picky eating phases with four kids. My rules:

1. For a family meal, I always make something where there is something everyone likes and can build on. Like spaghetti with a vegetable salad and bread.

2. For desert - the kid must have eaten some or most of the protein and vegetable served. That usually gets them to at least swallow the healthy stuff which I find in time they learn to like.

3. Absolutely no complaining or special side meals made - full stop.

We have gone thru periods where one kid will say only eat the pasta and bread, but they eventually grow out of it. Me not stressing or getting upset and not watching like a hawk what they eat seems to have allowed them to grow into their own tastes with time. Now we sit down ages 2, 5, 8, and 10 and everyone eats almost everything.

I will add I don't offer dessert every night. But I also do not allow anything like fruit or a bed time snack either if the healthy portions of dinner have not been tried and consumed to some reasonable degree. Also, my pediatrician once told me that what matters more is adequate fruits and veggies over a week's time, not so much worrying about it every day, which gets exhausting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They sit down with us, they try everything, they eat what they can, they don’t complain. No alternative choices.

They have turned out to be polite and non-picky eaters. While my son would have gone this way if we had let him, he always finds something he can eat wherever we go.

I detest picky children who are indulged. The only thing worse is picky adults, who are just big, ill-mannered children themselves. Never made to grow up. Unless you have an actual diagnosed issue .

I detest parents who think they have such control over their kids to make them into a certain type of eater. I prefer a relaxed pleasant family meal time where no one is forced to gag on their peas because mom insists everyone must eat peas.

Sorry you detest us, but we do succeed in getting our kids to outgrow picky eating phases and become the kind of well-mannered kids who can go places without needing special indulgences.

I have ridden out the picky eating phases with four kids. My rules:

1. For a family meal, I always make something where there is something everyone likes and can build on. Like spaghetti with a vegetable salad and bread.

2. For desert - the kid must have eaten some or most of the protein and vegetable served. That usually gets them to at least swallow the healthy stuff which I find in time they learn to like.

3. Absolutely no complaining or special side meals made - full stop.

We have gone thru periods where one kid will say only eat the pasta and bread, but they eventually grow out of it. Me not stressing or getting upset and not watching like a hawk what they eat seems to have allowed them to grow into their own tastes with time. Now we sit down ages 2, 5, 8, and 10 and everyone eats almost everything.

Anonymous wrote:They sit down with us, they try everything, they eat what they can, they don’t complain. No alternative choices.

They have turned out to be polite and non-picky eaters. While my son would have gone this way if we had let him, he always finds something he can eat wherever we go.

I detest picky children who are indulged. The only thing worse is picky adults, who are just big, ill-mannered children themselves. Never made to grow up. Unless you have an actual diagnosed issue .

I detest parents who think they have such control over their kids to make them into a certain type of eater. I prefer a relaxed pleasant family meal time where no one is forced to gag on their peas because mom insists everyone must eat peas.