Anonymous wrote:You think your DH is on DCUM?

He’s okay with a house rental but not a condo?? Not a hotel either?

For a 50k town you should be able to find something suitable within 20 miles and just drive to museum. Why are you hung up on sketchy neighborhood? Like are you staying in New Haven?

I am impressed.

No condo, no hotel. Too loud, except the ones that are out of our budget.

Anonymous wrote:One of the best things you can each do for your relationship is honor each of your feelings/fears, even if the other person doesn’t share them.

I agree in theory, but it sounds to me like OP’s DH doesn’t have a rational fear, but rather is incredibly picky.

He REQUIRES a house? Why? He can’t spend a weekend in a condo when you’re mostly going to be at museums? You know a nice hotel is a better option than a house, I have experienced some pretty awful AirBnBs that look fine in pictures but are dirty and gross, and once you get there, there’s very little recourse. Is the house in a bad neighborhood, like you have read about violent crime, or just run down and shabby?

It sounds to me like the DH is being ridiculous and you should go and if he hates it, he is in charge of booking all accommodations for any trip going forward.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d cancel just because it sounds awful. Museum trip to a small town in a sketchy neighborhood? Hard pass.

Great, no one asked you.

Ok fine. Yes, OP should tell her husband knowing he will want to cancel this terrible sounding trip.

You're not invited, so your input is meaninglesd.

OP literally asked, and I quote “Do I confess, knowing he'll insist on canceling?”

I was merely answering the question posed in the OP.

Reading comp is hard, I know.

No one asked what you think of the vacation itself.

One of the best things you can each do for your relationship is honor each of your feelings/fears, even if the other person doesn’t share them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d cancel just because it sounds awful. Museum trip to a small town in a sketchy neighborhood? Hard pass.

Great, no one asked you.

Ok fine. Yes, OP should tell her husband knowing he will want to cancel this terrible sounding trip.

You're not invited, so your input is meaninglesd.

OP literally asked, and I quote “Do I confess, knowing he'll insist on canceling?”

I was merely answering the question posed in the OP.

Reading comp is hard, I know.

You think your DH is on DCUM?

He’s okay with a house rental but not a condo?? Not a hotel either?

For a 50k town you should be able to find something suitable within 20 miles and just drive to museum. Why are you hung up on sketchy neighborhood? Like are you staying in New Haven?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d cancel just because it sounds awful. Museum trip to a small town in a sketchy neighborhood? Hard pass.

Great, no one asked you.

Ok fine. Yes, OP should tell her husband knowing he will want to cancel this terrible sounding trip.

You're not invited, so your input is meaninglesd.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d cancel just because it sounds awful. Museum trip to a small town in a sketchy neighborhood? Hard pass.

Great, no one asked you.

Ok fine. Yes, OP should tell her husband knowing he will want to cancel this terrible sounding trip.

Demonstrably high crime is very different from just run-down. Which is it?

If there is danger, I would pick a well-known hotel, not a house. There are always people in a hotel, ready to call 911. I would drive directly to the hotel in a nondescript car and not leave except to drive to the museums you want to tour. Eat at the hotel.

Anonymous wrote:I’d cancel just because it sounds awful. Museum trip to a small town in a sketchy neighborhood? Hard pass.

Great, no one asked you.

I’d cancel just because it sounds awful. Museum trip to a small town in a sketchy neighborhood? Hard pass.

Anonymous wrote:If he actually fears for your personal safety (even if you think that fear is overblown), it's worth a discussion of how to adapt: Maybe take cab/Uber everywhere, for instance. If he will just be annoyed because he doesn't like staying near poor people or walking by trash, then I think it's not worth discussing.

Classic DCUM. Husband doesn't like staying in a crackhead alley on a vacation? It's not even worth discussing! Who cares what he thinks, he should STFU.

Anonymous wrote:Gotta say I am intrigued trying to guess which city. Pop less than 50k but sketchy neighborhoods vs not and multiple museums worth making a trip for.

US or elsewhere?

US. Coastal area. Tons of vacation rentals in neighboring tourist towns, to be fair, but mostly condos (he requires a house) or out of our budget.

Gotta say I am intrigued trying to guess which city. Pop less than 50k but sketchy neighborhoods vs not and multiple museums worth making a trip for.

US or elsewhere?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why waste a vacation at a place you described as sketchy?

We won't be there much. This is mostly a museum trip.

If it truly is a sketch neighborhood, you will be marked the minute you roll into to town.

Nah, we don't dress upscale on vacation and will be in a rental car.