A better title for this post would be “bad marriage is a bad deal.” Good marriage is a good deal!

In 90% of marriages, yes, women get a raw deal. I count myself as one of the lucky ones: high-earning, sensitive, loving husband who shares the mental and domestic load and is a great dad.

I recognize my experience is definitely not common.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing like a hive of bitter divorced women.

Many women do just great with marriage! A loving husband who provides and cares for his wife and children. The freedom to work, or not work. Physical and intellectual satisfaction.

Try not being so miserable. Works wonders.

I’m early 20s and read this forum. A close relative just finalized her divorce after 22 years to her abusive exH. Thankfully she’s relatively young, in her 40s, but she’d been a SAHM for 20 years and is very concerned about how she’s going to support herself.

She should have gotten a degree or worked part time while at home. That's the best

Anonymous wrote:In the country club world very few women are gainfully employed. They mostly spend their time spending their husband's money and gossiping on the tennis court...what a rough life. And they are entitled to 1/2 the assets + alimony. Horrible system. No wealthy man should ever get married. Just have kids with your girlfriend.

Not sure which country club you're talking about. I am a member of one in dmv, and routinely meet women who are highly paid real estate brokers, work for IMF/WB and make just as much as their husbands. Husbands waste money on girlfriends, golfing etc.

Anonymous wrote:Nothing like a hive of bitter divorced women.

Many women do just great with marriage! A loving husband who provides and cares for his wife and children. The freedom to work, or not work. Physical and intellectual satisfaction.

Try not being so miserable. Works wonders.

Most marriages are not like that. Don’t state the exception as the rule.

Anonymous wrote:Nothing like a hive of bitter divorced women.

Many women do just great with marriage! A loving husband who provides and cares for his wife and children. The freedom to work, or not work. Physical and intellectual satisfaction.

Try not being so miserable. Works wonders.

I’m early 20s and read this forum. A close relative just finalized her divorce after 22 years to her abusive exH. Thankfully she’s relatively young, in her 40s, but she’d been a SAHM for 20 years and is very concerned about how she’s going to support herself.

Anonymous wrote:Nothing like a hive of bitter divorced women.

Many women do just great with marriage! A loving husband who provides and cares for his wife and children. The freedom to work, or not work. Physical and intellectual satisfaction.

Try not being so miserable. Works wonders.

I felt this way when I was married—and before. I thought it was logically a bad deal. I was right.

Anonymous wrote:In the country club world very few women are gainfully employed. They mostly spend their time spending their husband's money and gossiping on the tennis court...what a rough life. And they are entitled to 1/2 the assets + alimony. Horrible system. No wealthy man should ever get married. Just have kids with your girlfriend.

And providing childcare, cleaning and giving birth.

Nothing like a hive of bitter divorced women.

Many women do just great with marriage! A loving husband who provides and cares for his wife and children. The freedom to work, or not work. Physical and intellectual satisfaction.

Try not being so miserable. Works wonders.

100% agree. I finally got divorced.

In the country club world very few women are gainfully employed. They mostly spend their time spending their husband's money and gossiping on the tennis court...what a rough life. And they are entitled to 1/2 the assets + alimony. Horrible system. No wealthy man should ever get married. Just have kids with your girlfriend.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Being a single mother who isn’t poor is the best.

I’m a not poor single mother and it’s no bed of roses.

But would life be easier for you if you had a second "child" - a grown up man who is not an equal contributor? And who's on your neck for sex, appreciation, dictates his terms, is cheap, controlling and doesn't take care of the house?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless the husband is rich.

Women do most of the unpaid and unnoticed domestic labor in the home. They use their body to create babies and then do most of the childcare.

If the husband isn’t rich, what does he bring to the table?

If the husband is rich, sands prenup, greatest deal ever for a woman!

If the prenup is to protect her, and guarantees annual pension contributions, grad education while she is popping out kids, alimony, education for kids, tenancy rights at marital home till kids are off to college etc then yes, it's a great deal for a woman who wants to devote herself to motherhood

Motherhood is a job on its own, very undervalued.

Anonymous wrote:Being a single mother who isn’t poor is the best.

I’m a not poor single mother and it’s no bed of roses.

Anonymous wrote:Unless the husband is rich.

Women do most of the unpaid and unnoticed domestic labor in the home. They use their body to create babies and then do most of the childcare.

If the husband isn’t rich, what does he bring to the table?

If the husband is rich, sands prenup, greatest deal ever for a woman!