Anonymous
Post 03/05/2023 15:25     Subject: What is most helpful to say to someone with a serious medical diagnosis?
In addition to specific, concrete offers to help, two things, at least for people with some uncertainty in prognosis:

-“I’m thinking of you and hoping for the best possible outcome”
-If they need it, just offer to be present and listen. Don’t run your mouth. Don’t offer platitudes (“god doesn’t give you any thing you can’t handle). Just be there with them. So much easier said than done
Anonymous
Post 03/05/2023 15:25     Subject: What is most helpful to say to someone with a serious medical diagnosis?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:“I’m going to drop off dinner on Wednesday. What time do you eat? Do you like tacos?”


That's pushy


Right.

You offer, do not force your help on people.
Anonymous
Post 03/05/2023 15:18     Subject: What is most helpful to say to someone with a serious medical diagnosis?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:“I’m going to drop off dinner on Wednesday. What time do you eat? Do you like tacos?”


That's pushy


No it's not! The person can toss the dinner if they want to.

Anonymous
Post 03/05/2023 15:13     Subject: What is most helpful to say to someone with a serious medical diagnosis?
Anonymous wrote:“I’m going to drop off dinner on Wednesday. What time do you eat? Do you like tacos?”


That's pushy
Anonymous
Post 03/05/2023 12:53     Subject: What is most helpful to say to someone with a serious medical diagnosis?
Anonymous wrote:"I am so sorry this is happening to you".

Keep the focus on the person experiencing it.

Thank you.
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2023 16:12     Subject: What is most helpful to say to someone with a serious medical diagnosis?
“I’m going to drop off dinner on Wednesday. What time do you eat? Do you like tacos?”
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2023 15:57     Subject: Re:What is most helpful to say to someone with a serious medical diagnosis?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I like it when people say 'I'm sorry to hear that. How can I support you?'


That’s how you lose a kidney or a lobe of your liver.


Its also patronizing. Not everyone is looking for "support" either practical or emotional. I find it helpful if people respect that I'm going to carry on as normal and I'm not impaired (even though I am). I think for me there's a lot of pride involved, but that's not the case for everyone.
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2023 15:21     Subject: Re:What is most helpful to say to someone with a serious medical diagnosis?
Anonymous wrote:I like it when people say 'I'm sorry to hear that. How can I support you?'


That’s how you lose a kidney or a lobe of your liver.
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2023 12:02     Subject: Re:What is most helpful to say to someone with a serious medical diagnosis?
I like it when people say 'I'm sorry to hear that. How can I support you?'
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2023 10:55     Subject: What is most helpful to say to someone with a serious medical diagnosis?
I’ve learned that just listening is really hard. In hindsight I wish I had focused on doing that when my dad broached the subject of his struggles with getting older/near death. I tried to reassure him which in reality was just dismissing his fears and feelings. I should have just listened.