Anonymous wrote:Parent of high school kids. Teachers do not care if you go to conferences in elementary, middle or high school. It’s on you. Don’t going you don’t want.

I’m an elementary teacher who does care if parents communicate but agree it doesn’t matter if it’s at conferences.

Anonymous wrote:OP, your child clearly needs more support and help. I have no idea why you'd alienate the one person in the school who has the best opportunity of helping your kid do well. There are 4 months left of the school year, we are just over 1/2 way. Why would you "write it off"? That is doing your kid a HUGE disservice, just because the teacher didn't follow your script for the last P-T conference.

Go in with some questions, and most of all LISTEN to what the teacher is saying. It seems you may be hearing it all, but not really listening.

+1

Parent of high school kids. Teachers do not care if you go to conferences in elementary, middle or high school. It’s on you. Don’t going you don’t want.

No, go and put on a good face because you may need her as an ally. I disliked my son's 2nd grade teacher's teaching style (she was not engaging the class and did not explain well) and I disagreed with her assessments. But, at the end of the school year when i had enough, I applied to private schools therefore I really needed a positive recommendation for my son. And she delivered because I had engaged with her mid-year to address my son's problems to improve his performance and any behavior issues resulting from her chaotic classroom.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go, but understand that things can be so much better if you move to another school system.

Which one?

The one for high maintenance parents with unrealistic expectations.

My child had a second year a bit like this. A teacher very focused on social emotional.

Go the conference prepared and with specific questions. Why would you skip an opportunity to have a conversation about the topics you say you are concerned about?

Bring copies of the tests. Ask what it means. Ask what the plan is. Press politely. That is entirely reasonable.

It's also reasonable for the teacher to talk about social-emotional topics. That is A LOT of what school is about at that age and it's very important and not some throw away topic. If your kid can't function and behave in a classroom setting, they won't learn. The academic and social-emotional issues are one and the same in the end.

Anonymous wrote:My kindergartener’s teacher is a babysitter as far as I am concerned. I asked about some academic things and how she would support him and she said “we won’t be covering that because that’s not developmentally appropriate in kindergarten”. Whether she think it’s appropriate or not, he’s doing 3rd grade math. We’re teaching him at home and he goes to school to play.

Besides my child stagnating for a year in math and reading skills, he’s also gone from being super curious and having the growth mindset attitude that he can do anything if he tries and practices to suddenly giving up with the slightest frustration and saying things like “I’m not good at X” or “I’m terrible, it’s awful”. I would not have pinned that wording on the teacher except that a mom at sports practice mentioned her son in the same class, but a different table, suddenly saying the same thing and also that he’a a “bad kid”.

I’m sending my husband to talk to her instead this time. I don’t want to even look at her. My older child also had a first year teacher for kindergarten, but she was much better.

This is actually pretty normal. When smart, capable kids come up against something they can’t easily do on the first try, they often feel frustrated. Kindergarten introduces many things they may not have had to do before, like more writing, reading, even focusing on one thing for longer. Mine definitely went through this phase. You just have to be patient and emphasis that you have to work at things, not just expect to do everything easily right away because that was true for some things.

Anonymous wrote:My kindergartener’s teacher is a babysitter as far as I am concerned. I asked about some academic things and how she would support him and she said “we won’t be covering that because that’s not developmentally appropriate in kindergarten”. Whether she think it’s appropriate or not, he’s doing 3rd grade math. We’re teaching him at home and he goes to school to play.

Besides my child stagnating for a year in math and reading skills, he’s also gone from being super curious and having the growth mindset attitude that he can do anything if he tries and practices to suddenly giving up with the slightest frustration and saying things like “I’m not good at X” or “I’m terrible, it’s awful”. I would not have pinned that wording on the teacher except that a mom at sports practice mentioned her son in the same class, but a different table, suddenly saying the same thing and also that he’a a “bad kid”.

I’m sending my husband to talk to her instead this time. I don’t want to even look at her. My older child also had a first year teacher for kindergarten, but she was much better.

well he probably has heard that from other kids in the class - it happens. They pick up stuff. Its not a controlled environment like preschool is. But it might also be true. There are skills they teach in K that he might not have mastered yet and he is struggling to pick them up. These could be academic or practical. Handwriting, scissor control, drawing, sitting still, science and social studies concepts, phonics, etc.

And how do you know your kid is doing 3rd grade math? First, those test scores they provide aren't exactly something to go by. You will learn that the grade level expectation is very, very low. so 3rd grade math grade level expectation can be addition. Not kidding either on this. So be careful before thinking your kid is a genius. And as others said its not reasonable that the K teacher just teach your kid 3rd grade math.

If you feel he is falling farther behind there are some really simple things to do at home. Show him how to measure with a ruler. Help him understand that 12 inches = 1 foot. Help him use a tape measure and compare measurements. Same thing with volume - pints, quarts, etc. Help him learn to read a clock. Right down random numbers like 58, 104, 81 and ask him to identify them in isolation.

Which tests is your kid below level on, and by how much? Can you give any examples of the minor things you have gotten calls about? Do they involve other kids as well?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kindergartener’s teacher is a babysitter as far as I am concerned. I asked about some academic things and how she would support him and she said “we won’t be covering that because that’s not developmentally appropriate in kindergarten”. Whether she think it’s appropriate or not, he’s doing 3rd grade math. We’re teaching him at home and he goes to school to play.

Besides my child stagnating for a year in math and reading skills, he’s also gone from being super curious and having the growth mindset attitude that he can do anything if he tries and practices to suddenly giving up with the slightest frustration and saying things like “I’m not good at X” or “I’m terrible, it’s awful”. I would not have pinned that wording on the teacher except that a mom at sports practice mentioned her son in the same class, but a different table, suddenly saying the same thing and also that he’a a “bad kid”.

I’m sending my husband to talk to her instead this time. I don’t want to even look at her. My older child also had a first year teacher for kindergarten, but she was much better.

Why would you expect a kindergarten teacher to be supporting your child's 3rd grade level math? That's not a reasonable expectation at ALL.

+1 a 5-6 year old isn’t stagnating. 🙄 Kindergarten is an important time for social emotional growth. Maybe chill in the “enrichment” and let your kid be a kid

Can’t help but wonder if the poor kid is giving up on things and thinking he can’t do things because he’s expected to do third grade math at home.

Anonymous wrote:The question is do you waste time going to spring conferences When you feel that your child’s teacher is less interested in academics performance and more interested in social emotional things, and has demonstrated poor communication unless it is to call you about some minor thing your child did to get under their skin. However, they don't call to say your child is performing below grade level on their standardized tests or offer a plan of remediation? This is for a 2nd grader, and the last conference the teacher only focused on who my child is friends with or has a bad influence on my child. I felt every effort to talk academics was diverted to talk about social emotional topics. I usually make an effort to attend conferences, but feel like what is the point. If summer school is recommended we should get a letter from the school at some point right, and not learn at PTC?

Just curious what others have done in similar situations or would do if they were in my shoes? Just so exhausted with this year, and can't wait for June.

Of course I would go, especially if my child has learning disabilities (mine does also). I think it’s shortsighted and foolish to write off a year or to assume the conference will be a waste of time. If you feel as if you don’t have an opportunity to discuss what you want, then I would listen to what the teacher has to say and then schedule another conference to share my thoughts as well.

Anonymous wrote:While you may have wanted to hear about academics or standardized test, it’s pretty clear the teacher thought you hearing about the social aspects related to your child were more important. I would look deeper into that, instead of being annoyed.

This.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kindergartener’s teacher is a babysitter as far as I am concerned. I asked about some academic things and how she would support him and she said “we won’t be covering that because that’s not developmentally appropriate in kindergarten”. Whether she think it’s appropriate or not, he’s doing 3rd grade math. We’re teaching him at home and he goes to school to play.

Besides my child stagnating for a year in math and reading skills, he’s also gone from being super curious and having the growth mindset attitude that he can do anything if he tries and practices to suddenly giving up with the slightest frustration and saying things like “I’m not good at X” or “I’m terrible, it’s awful”. I would not have pinned that wording on the teacher except that a mom at sports practice mentioned her son in the same class, but a different table, suddenly saying the same thing and also that he’a a “bad kid”.

I’m sending my husband to talk to her instead this time. I don’t want to even look at her. My older child also had a first year teacher for kindergarten, but she was much better.

Why would you expect a kindergarten teacher to be supporting your child's 3rd grade level math? That's not a reasonable expectation at ALL.

It's an absurd expectation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kindergartener’s teacher is a babysitter as far as I am concerned. I asked about some academic things and how she would support him and she said “we won’t be covering that because that’s not developmentally appropriate in kindergarten”. Whether she think it’s appropriate or not, he’s doing 3rd grade math. We’re teaching him at home and he goes to school to play.

Besides my child stagnating for a year in math and reading skills, he’s also gone from being super curious and having the growth mindset attitude that he can do anything if he tries and practices to suddenly giving up with the slightest frustration and saying things like “I’m not good at X” or “I’m terrible, it’s awful”. I would not have pinned that wording on the teacher except that a mom at sports practice mentioned her son in the same class, but a different table, suddenly saying the same thing and also that he’a a “bad kid”.

I’m sending my husband to talk to her instead this time. I don’t want to even look at her. My older child also had a first year teacher for kindergarten, but she was much better.

Why would you expect a kindergarten teacher to be supporting your child's 3rd grade level math? That's not a reasonable expectation at ALL.

+1 a 5-6 year old isn’t stagnating. 🙄 Kindergarten is an important time for social emotional growth. Maybe chill in the “enrichment” and let your kid be a kid