Anonymous
01/06/2023 20:40
Subject: Re:Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I'm sorry, I did not mean we wanted to visit ALL of those schools!! I was hoping to get suggestions on priorities for Trip 2. We REALLY want to split the trip up. Both parents (me, DH) want to have some alone time with DD (I won't get into reasons here but it's necessary) and both of us want to see some schools with her. We can't both go together. And PP did get it right, she is a UMC white girl. But, she is goes to a minority-majority school and most of her friends including her BF are NOT white. She is concerned about the lack of diversity at some schools - so if anyone has a not-so-UMC-white-girl school to add, hit me up!
Why do you need alone time? Just curious because college trips can be a good bonding time but there can also be stress and potential conflict.
Yes true. But conflict or not she needs this to be just about her and parents alone. We have a special needs child that takes priority the majority of the time. And we can’t bring our other child with us or leave her home so it has to be her and one parent. Our idea was to split the week. But we are re-thinking.
That makes sense! We split up some visits just one on one with our older child and had some nice trips. I only asked because if you were trying to resolve some other issues with the older child college visits can be intense and might not be the best time.
Oh yeah totally agree. No, that’s not the kind of alone time I’m looking for. I just want it to be all about her, for once. There will definitely be conflict. She’s very stressed out about this - which is part of the reason I’m posting on an anonymous forum! She won’t discuss it with me without getting totally stressed out or avoiding the subject!
Aww she sounds like a good kid. My older child had severe anxiety (and other challenges) and the visits were good but also very stressful.
Anonymous
01/06/2023 20:33
Subject: Re:Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I'm sorry, I did not mean we wanted to visit ALL of those schools!! I was hoping to get suggestions on priorities for Trip 2. We REALLY want to split the trip up. Both parents (me, DH) want to have some alone time with DD (I won't get into reasons here but it's necessary) and both of us want to see some schools with her. We can't both go together. And PP did get it right, she is a UMC white girl. But, she is goes to a minority-majority school and most of her friends including her BF are NOT white. She is concerned about the lack of diversity at some schools - so if anyone has a not-so-UMC-white-girl school to add, hit me up!
Why do you need alone time? Just curious because college trips can be a good bonding time but there can also be stress and potential conflict.
Yes true. But conflict or not she needs this to be just about her and parents alone. We have a special needs child that takes priority the majority of the time. And we can’t bring our other child with us or leave her home so it has to be her and one parent. Our idea was to split the week. But we are re-thinking.
That makes sense! We split up some visits just one on one with our older child and had some nice trips. I only asked because if you were trying to resolve some other issues with the older child college visits can be intense and might not be the best time.
Oh yeah totally agree. No, that’s not the kind of alone time I’m looking for. I just want it to be all about her, for once. There will definitely be conflict. She’s very stressed out about this - which is part of the reason I’m posting on an anonymous forum! She won’t discuss it with me without getting totally stressed out or avoiding the subject!
Anonymous
01/06/2023 20:27
Subject: Re:Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I'm sorry, I did not mean we wanted to visit ALL of those schools!! I was hoping to get suggestions on priorities for Trip 2. We REALLY want to split the trip up. Both parents (me, DH) want to have some alone time with DD (I won't get into reasons here but it's necessary) and both of us want to see some schools with her. We can't both go together. And PP did get it right, she is a UMC white girl. But, she is goes to a minority-majority school and most of her friends including her BF are NOT white. She is concerned about the lack of diversity at some schools - so if anyone has a not-so-UMC-white-girl school to add, hit me up!
Why do you need alone time? Just curious because college trips can be a good bonding time but there can also be stress and potential conflict.
Yes true. But conflict or not she needs this to be just about her and parents alone. We have a special needs child that takes priority the majority of the time. And we can’t bring our other child with us or leave her home so it has to be her and one parent. Our idea was to split the week. But we are re-thinking.
That makes sense! We split up some visits just one on one with our older child and had some nice trips. I only asked because if you were trying to resolve some other issues with the older child college visits can be intense and might not be the best time.
Anonymous
01/06/2023 20:18
Subject: Re:Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I'm sorry, I did not mean we wanted to visit ALL of those schools!! I was hoping to get suggestions on priorities for Trip 2. We REALLY want to split the trip up. Both parents (me, DH) want to have some alone time with DD (I won't get into reasons here but it's necessary) and both of us want to see some schools with her. We can't both go together. And PP did get it right, she is a UMC white girl. But, she is goes to a minority-majority school and most of her friends including her BF are NOT white. She is concerned about the lack of diversity at some schools - so if anyone has a not-so-UMC-white-girl school to add, hit me up!
Why do you need alone time? Just curious because college trips can be a good bonding time but there can also be stress and potential conflict.
Yes true. But conflict or not she needs this to be just about her and parents alone. We have a special needs child that takes priority the majority of the time. And we can’t bring our other child with us or leave her home so it has to be her and one parent. Our idea was to split the week. But we are re-thinking.
Anonymous
01/06/2023 20:13
Subject: Re:Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I'm sorry, I did not mean we wanted to visit ALL of those schools!! I was hoping to get suggestions on priorities for Trip 2. We REALLY want to split the trip up. Both parents (me, DH) want to have some alone time with DD (I won't get into reasons here but it's necessary) and both of us want to see some schools with her. We can't both go together. And PP did get it right, she is a UMC white girl. But, she is goes to a minority-majority school and most of her friends including her BF are NOT white. She is concerned about the lack of diversity at some schools - so if anyone has a not-so-UMC-white-girl school to add, hit me up!
Why do you need alone time? Just curious because college trips can be a good bonding time but there can also be stress and potential conflict.
Anonymous
01/06/2023 20:05
Subject: Re:Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I'm sorry, I did not mean we wanted to visit ALL of those schools!! I was hoping to get suggestions on priorities for Trip 2. We REALLY want to split the trip up. Both parents (me, DH) want to have some alone time with DD (I won't get into reasons here but it's necessary) and both of us want to see some schools with her. We can't both go together. And PP did get it right, she is a UMC white girl. But, she is goes to a minority-majority school and most of her friends including her BF are NOT white. She is concerned about the lack of diversity at some schools - so if anyone has a not-so-UMC-white-girl school to add, hit me up!
Don’t defend yourself. If you listed all black colleges they wouldn’t come write “oh bougey black girl”.
I can’t stand the diversity mongers. Every damn school touts it’s diversity and Under-represented numbers. Who cares what these idiots think.
Anonymous
01/06/2023 19:40
Subject: Help me plan our spring break visits
OP here. So my first motive (in addition to spending alone time with her in a fun place) is to find safety/likelies she’ll fall in love with. She’s got good stats (high GPA, good test scores, dedicated leadership ECs but nothing so out of the ordinary.). I want her to let go of the Ivy/prestige idea and see what’s out there.
So Vassar, Dartmouth, Hamilton etc not high priorities - I’d love her to see Syracuse/Ithaca, UVM, maybe a couple of others but I’m wondering if we should just do Syracuse/Ithaca this trip and have one of us do a long weekend to NYC area schools another time.
So Vassar, Dartmouth, Hamilton etc not high priorities - I’d love her to see Syracuse/Ithaca, UVM, maybe a couple of others but I’m wondering if we should just do Syracuse/Ithaca this trip and have one of us do a long weekend to NYC area schools another time.
Anonymous
01/06/2023 19:10
Subject: Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:Okay this is complicated so looking for help. We live in DMV and want to make the most of spring break for visits because DD (junior) will be away all summer. She's seen Brown (reach, obviously) and UMD and is going to see Oberlin and Kenyon next week.
DH and I need to split up the spring break trip because other DC needs to be home and can't be alone. Here's her list rated by what schools she's excited to see:
Dartmouth
UVM
Vassar
Ithaca
Syracuse
Cornell
Connecticut College
Skidmore
Bard
Wesleyan
I'm inclined to wait on Vassar and Skidmore unless/until she gets in because they don't give merit aid. I want her to see more "likely" schools but not against going to see Dartmouth if we do UVM. We just want her to have a fun spring break getting excited about a few more schools and having alone time with each parent. But the driving/location schedule is overwhelming me! I am thinking one parent leaves with her Thursday night 3/31 (she doesn't have school on Friday), does a visit Friday/Monday (maybe Saturday if offered), the come back Monday night. Tuesday down time and leaves with other parent Wednesday morning for visit Thursday/Friday (maybe Saturday if offered) and return on the weekend. She's not a kid who can do more than one visit in a day, and is going to need some down time/restaurant/fun time in between.
I did make a previous post looking for recommendations for Syracuse/Ithaca, and I definitely think we want this to be one leg of the trip - but it's a far drive.
Suggestions?
Bard doesn’t give merit aid either.
Anonymous
01/06/2023 18:58
Subject: Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:Okay this is complicated so looking for help. We live in DMV and want to make the most of spring break for visits because DD (junior) will be away all summer. She's seen Brown (reach, obviously) and UMD and is going to see Oberlin and Kenyon next week.
DH and I need to split up the spring break trip because other DC needs to be home and can't be alone. Here's her list rated by what schools she's excited to see:
Dartmouth
UVM
Vassar
Ithaca
Syracuse
Cornell
Connecticut College
Skidmore
Bard
Wesleyan
I'm inclined to wait on Vassar and Skidmore unless/until she gets in because they don't give merit aid. I want her to see more "likely" schools but not against going to see Dartmouth if we do UVM. We just want her to have a fun spring break getting excited about a few more schools and having alone time with each parent. But the driving/location schedule is overwhelming me! I am thinking one parent leaves with her Thursday night 3/31 (she doesn't have school on Friday), does a visit Friday/Monday (maybe Saturday if offered), the come back Monday night. Tuesday down time and leaves with other parent Wednesday morning for visit Thursday/Friday (maybe Saturday if offered) and return on the weekend. She's not a kid who can do more than one visit in a day, and is going to need some down time/restaurant/fun time in between.
I did make a previous post looking for recommendations for Syracuse/Ithaca, and I definitely think we want this to be one leg of the trip - but it's a far drive.
Suggestions?
Bard and Vassar go together; you really should see both if you are already there. If seeing Dartmouth is a top priority, you could forget about Skidmore and possibly take this nice loop: Vassar/Bard to Williams (90 min from Bard) to Middlebury (2 hours, stunning drive; stop in Manchester, VT) to Dartmouth (90 minutes) to the Five College area (under 2 hours straight south on highway). Just saying, going from Bard to Dartmouth you are going to pass relatively close to either Williams/Middlebury or Amherst anyhow (or both if you do it as a loop), so you might want to tour at least one additional school in those parts. If you do get to the Five College area, it is only 75-80 minutes from there to Wesleyan, and Conn College another 45…
Anonymous
01/06/2023 16:53
Subject: Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:I’d do Syracuse/Cornell/Ithaca, consider adding Hamilton, then Skidmore, then decide your next priority. Either Dartmouth and UVM or down via Vassar. Bard/Vassar and Wesleyan/Conn are most easily done on a long weekend. But Dartmouth and Uvm are a lot add.
But should add that Uvm is only 2.5 hours from Skidmore so if you want to get it done, I’d just do that and come back via Dartmouth. Might as well add Middlebury…?
Anonymous
01/06/2023 16:51
Subject: Help me plan our spring break visits
I’d do Syracuse/Cornell/Ithaca, consider adding Hamilton, then Skidmore, then decide your next priority. Either Dartmouth and UVM or down via Vassar. Bard/Vassar and Wesleyan/Conn are most easily done on a long weekend. But Dartmouth and Uvm are a lot add.
Anonymous
01/06/2023 16:48
Subject: Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:I would check first on the availability of tours (days and times) and go from there.
+1
Anonymous
01/06/2023 16:07
Subject: Re:Help me plan our spring break visits
Anonymous wrote:PS maybe think about doing one trip that is:
Wesleyan
Connecticut College
Bard
Skidmore
Maybe add Marist, Sarah Lawrence, and Fordham on the way back?
Another trip that is Syracuse, Cornell, Ithaca, perhaps add Hamilton College and/or some other LAC's if of interest?
You could even add a few SUNY schools to the mix if you're in the area, like Albany, Binghamton, and Purchase...
Hope you have great weather and great trips!
I didn't mean to leave out Vassar! Great school...
Anonymous
01/06/2023 16:06
Subject: Help me plan our spring break visits
I would personally have the second trip be some schools on PA or VA. I just think both trips that far will be tiring. You could do Cornell, Syracuse, SUNY BING, Ithaca in one trip, and 3 PA schools on the second trip - the PA schools could give her the feel of a smaller SLAC.
Anonymous
01/06/2023 16:06
Subject: Re:Help me plan our spring break visits
PS maybe think about doing one trip that is:
Wesleyan
Connecticut College
Bard
Skidmore
Maybe add Marist, Sarah Lawrence, and Fordham on the way back?
Another trip that is Syracuse, Cornell, Ithaca, perhaps add Hamilton College and/or some other LAC's if of interest?
You could even add a few SUNY schools to the mix if you're in the area, like Albany, Binghamton, and Purchase...
Hope you have great weather and great trips!
Wesleyan
Connecticut College
Bard
Skidmore
Maybe add Marist, Sarah Lawrence, and Fordham on the way back?
Another trip that is Syracuse, Cornell, Ithaca, perhaps add Hamilton College and/or some other LAC's if of interest?
You could even add a few SUNY schools to the mix if you're in the area, like Albany, Binghamton, and Purchase...
Hope you have great weather and great trips!