I too would ask that they have the kids at their place for a day. A day for you to not be ON. Ask for a day to have the house to yourself to get in back in order after the holidays and hosting.

Isn’t this what holidays are all about? You host relatives for a while and then they go home again? I mean I hosted my sister in law and her kids in my house for 6 days and my father in law and his wife for 3 days over Xmas. They actually stayed with us too that entire time. Having the in laws over for dinner twice doesn’t sound like a big ask at all. Just have your husband deal with them and do your own thing when they come over until you go back to work if you want.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would you ask the same if it were your parents and your DH made the same request?

Absolutely not. That’s part of the issue. I’m disappointed in myself for never standing up for myself.

This is all totally ridiculous. Tell your hsuband directly “I need a break from visitors. I know your parents want to come over but you need to tell them no this week.”

And next time they come over, tell your hsuband he needs to fix all their freaking snacks and clean up their messes. If he has to do this for several visits, he might realize they are not “helpful.”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"I don't mean to sound like a jerk, but I need a break from family visits." Simple. Unless your DH makes it an issue.

I don’t think he will make it an issue, but I think he will see it as a bonus for me (I can sneak off while they are here) and will not want to disappoint his parents.

This is your problem right here. Everyone is *thinking* they know what the other person wants and trying to manage. Instead, be proactive and direct. If you say nothing, I bet my paycheck your husband will go ahead and make plans with his parents to come over this week. He’ll pat himself on the back thinking he’s doing you a big favor.

Today, before the sun goes down, speak directly with your spouse. Many here have already offered the language to use. None of it matters unless you’re proactive.