Anonymous
12/22/2022 23:09
Subject: Re:Number of kids
Anonymous wrote:Am friends with a lot of people with ~10 year old kids.
Those with 1 kid only? Marriage and life is good.
Those with 2 kids all girls? Marriage and life is good.
Those with 2 kids all boys? Marriage in the shitter.
No kidding, but I've had the convo with multiple friends in the last 2 months about how much more horrible 2 boys is versus all the other possibilities. No sex, verge of divorce, household is constant state of stress, yelling and chaos. But 2 girls in and around age 10? It's like there are three moms - making dinner, cleaning, and doing compliant work to make the house hold run better. Boys is literally what's pushing my friends to divorce.
Mom of two boys, including one who is in the pipeline to be diagnosed with…something. I’m married to my favorite human on the planet, and two boys is *hard* on our marriage. Fighting, climbing the walls, judgement from moms with quieter kids. I love my kids, and I used to want more, but our one boy needs more attention than several children. SO glad we figured that out in time to stop at two.
Anonymous
12/22/2022 23:09
Subject: Re:Number of kids
Anonymous wrote:Am friends with a lot of people with ~10 year old kids.
Those with 1 kid only? Marriage and life is good.
Those with 2 kids all girls? Marriage and life is good.
Those with 2 kids all boys? Marriage in the shitter.
No kidding, but I've had the convo with multiple friends in the last 2 months about how much more horrible 2 boys is versus all the other possibilities. No sex, verge of divorce, household is constant state of stress, yelling and chaos. But 2 girls in and around age 10? It's like there are three moms - making dinner, cleaning, and doing compliant work to make the house hold run better. Boys is literally what's pushing my friends to divorce.
Okay I was giving you the benefit of the doubt and then got to the part about how the daughters are cooking and cleaning. What the actual F.
Anonymous
12/22/2022 23:08
Subject: Re:Number of kids
Thats cute several posters know what having only is without having an only 
We stopped with one as life is crazy busy and one is more than enough for us!
We stopped with one as life is crazy busy and one is more than enough for us!
Anonymous
12/22/2022 23:07
Subject: Re:Number of kids
We had two.
I wanted my kid to have a sibling. I wanted to experience being a parent to two different humans. No regrets.
I do see advantages of one. Things are quiet and they don’t disrupt your adult life as much.
I wanted my kid to have a sibling. I wanted to experience being a parent to two different humans. No regrets.
I do see advantages of one. Things are quiet and they don’t disrupt your adult life as much.
Anonymous
12/22/2022 23:00
Subject: Number of kids
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yeah I bet. Stop there and enjoy while the rest of us go crazy.Anonymous wrote:Confirming that one is indeed a breeze. It’s like having your cake and eating it too. Best part is how much DD loves being an only.
Ha, well she’s 9 and I’m well into perimenopause, so that ship sailed a while ago.
One of 2, only ever wanted to be an only and have an only.
Twins
It's fine! But I still think if life hadn't handed me that surprise 1 would have been the way to go. DH is one of 6 and also was on the only train.
Anonymous
12/22/2022 22:13
Subject: Re:Number of kids
Am friends with a lot of people with ~10 year old kids.
Those with 1 kid only? Marriage and life is good.
Those with 2 kids all girls? Marriage and life is good.
Those with 2 kids all boys? Marriage in the shitter.
No kidding, but I've had the convo with multiple friends in the last 2 months about how much more horrible 2 boys is versus all the other possibilities. No sex, verge of divorce, household is constant state of stress, yelling and chaos. But 2 girls in and around age 10? It's like there are three moms - making dinner, cleaning, and doing compliant work to make the house hold run better. Boys is literally what's pushing my friends to divorce.
Those with 1 kid only? Marriage and life is good.
Those with 2 kids all girls? Marriage and life is good.
Those with 2 kids all boys? Marriage in the shitter.
No kidding, but I've had the convo with multiple friends in the last 2 months about how much more horrible 2 boys is versus all the other possibilities. No sex, verge of divorce, household is constant state of stress, yelling and chaos. But 2 girls in and around age 10? It's like there are three moms - making dinner, cleaning, and doing compliant work to make the house hold run better. Boys is literally what's pushing my friends to divorce.
Anonymous
12/22/2022 20:31
Subject: Re:Number of kids
Anonymous wrote:I am so happy we had 4 and can’t imagine only having 2. Funny how it’s such a personal decision.
Same, and this is how I feel too. It feels very weird when there’s only 1 or 2 kids in the house. But I was also cut out to be a parent to a big family, and I think it’s good when people know themselves and their limits
Anonymous
12/22/2022 20:22
Subject: Number of kids
Anonymous wrote:I feel like this thread is going to devolve into judgmental insult-slinging.
I’m so pleasantly surprised it hasn’t!
Anonymous
12/22/2022 19:25
Subject: Re:Number of kids
Anonymous wrote:Having one is not a breeze if you wanted two, and can't. Then you get to parent one with crippling grief.
Or when you have 2, and have crippling grief not having 3.
Or in my case, having 3 and grieving…we all want different things but none of it is wrong. Dont judge me for wanting 4…even if I look tired.
Anonymous
12/22/2022 19:25
Subject: Number of kids
Anonymous wrote:I feel like this thread is going to devolve into judgmental insult-slinging.
I thought that was the point of this thread?
Think of the earth's dwindling resources and all that.
Anonymous
12/22/2022 19:24
Subject: Number of kids
I feel like this thread is going to devolve into judgmental insult-slinging.
Anonymous
12/22/2022 19:22
Subject: Re:Number of kids
Anonymous wrote:Having one is not a breeze if you wanted two, and can't. Then you get to parent one with crippling grief.
Original PP with one. We did 5 years of IVF and had half a dozen miscarriages trying for a second. I’m sorry you’re in that situation too. You can move on. Time helps. Your child deserves better than a childhood full of crippling grief.
Anonymous
12/22/2022 14:38
Subject: Re:Number of kids
We have five. All adults. Yes, it was crazy at times. But it was also just so wonderful!
Anonymous
12/22/2022 14:35
Subject: Number of kids
Anonymous wrote:Three boys and very happy with 3. Always wanted 4, but decided to stick with three because I was worried about giving enough attention and fully meeting the needs of 4 kids. 3 is perfect, and feels manageable and like a big family.
This is exactly how I feel about having three, too - we have a girl and two boys. When I was expecting the third, a friend who also has three told me that three is the magic number and I really do feel that it is. DH and I have thriving careers, we have plenty of time for our kids and each other and friends, and we get these three awesome kids who (mostly) like each other and have fun together. It’s really cool.
Anonymous
12/22/2022 14:32
Subject: Number of kids
Three boys and very happy with 3. Always wanted 4, but decided to stick with three because I was worried about giving enough attention and fully meeting the needs of 4 kids. 3 is perfect, and feels manageable and like a big family.