Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, where do you commute from? Commuting time should probably be #1 on your list of priorities if you are genuinely indifferent between MD and VA. Also, I wouldn’t dismiss the MD/VA debate so casually because in the DMV your political leanings can create community and/or make you feel like a fish out of water. This is a very political region (for obvious reasons) so if you lean left or right at all, the MD/VA debate is relevant.

I agree with PP that your worry of being shut out of long-established networks is not likely to happen except in the most exclusive/expensive neighborhoods (think $5m+ homes on big lots far from one another) where there isn’t much community vibe anyway. You don’t need to worry about that at all in Chevy Chase, DC, for example. Most people are from somewhere else. Truly multigenerational DMV natives are in the minority.

OP here. We work mostly from home and have to go to NYC about 2x a month so being somewhat close to the Amtrak is helpful. Like having some walkability like everyone else somewhat but it's really about having a community.
Yeah yeah political leanings blah blah- DC people are easy to play that way- it becomes easy to figure out which way they lean and then talk that up. Everyone here is so emotionally charged about it. Don't really care-it's all about positioning yourself to make $ off the current environment

Gross

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, where do you commute from? Commuting time should probably be #1 on your list of priorities if you are genuinely indifferent between MD and VA. Also, I wouldn’t dismiss the MD/VA debate so casually because in the DMV your political leanings can create community and/or make you feel like a fish out of water. This is a very political region (for obvious reasons) so if you lean left or right at all, the MD/VA debate is relevant.

I agree with PP that your worry of being shut out of long-established networks is not likely to happen except in the most exclusive/expensive neighborhoods (think $5m+ homes on big lots far from one another) where there isn’t much community vibe anyway. You don’t need to worry about that at all in Chevy Chase, DC, for example. Most people are from somewhere else. Truly multigenerational DMV natives are in the minority.

OP here. We work mostly from home and have to go to NYC about 2x a month so being somewhat close to the Amtrak is helpful. Like having some walkability like everyone else somewhat but it's really about having a community.
Yeah yeah political leanings blah blah- DC people are easy to play that way- it becomes easy to figure out which way they lean and then talk that up. Everyone here is so emotionally charged about it. Don't really care-it's all about positioning yourself to make $ off the current environment

Based on this response, I am going to recommend Virginia. Virginia is the place for Republicans and others who are blithely indifferent to truth/integrity/empathy/authenticity/and the wellbeing of others. Good luck in your new home! Remember that Maryland and everywhere north of Dupont Circle is infested with brain-eating zombies who will attack without notice. Beware and stay away!

As someone who is considering both options,I'm leaning towards McLean despite the fact that it will be a longer commute.

Anonymous wrote:Don't do Chevy Chase or McLean - lots of old Washington families in those neighborhoods who all know each other from the same private schools and summers in Nantucket. Same thing in Georgetown DC.

Look at DC (AU Park, Palisades, Glover Park), Arlington, and Fairfax city if you want to find friendly neighbors with families and open to making new friends.

I disagree. McLean has lots of transplants, and VA in general. Do McLean. It would not even be a debate for me, and I am from MoCo.

From my very unscientific opinion, Chevy Chase has more of an old-money, established neighborhood vibe. McLean is larger, has no real "old guard", and does have lots of younger families stretching to buy there due to close proximity to town and affluent schools.

I grew up on the mainline and now live in CC with young kids here is my advice:

NW DC is truly the best bet -- on redfin search in "DEAL middle school" -- that catchment is not old money, has casual vibes, and is on the redline so you can easily get to amtrak. DC also has free prek4 and a lot of the daycares are now offering free prek3 on that side of the park -- sooo you will have two years less of childcare payments then you will in MD/VA. All of those public elementary schools are excellent too.

Don't worry about making friends, NW DC is full of families that are 1. are not from here and 2. desperate to say they still "live in the city" and like to go out. Once you have kids you will make a ton of friends just from mom groups/ play dates / etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, where do you commute from? Commuting time should probably be #1 on your list of priorities if you are genuinely indifferent between MD and VA. Also, I wouldn’t dismiss the MD/VA debate so casually because in the DMV your political leanings can create community and/or make you feel like a fish out of water. This is a very political region (for obvious reasons) so if you lean left or right at all, the MD/VA debate is relevant.

I agree with PP that your worry of being shut out of long-established networks is not likely to happen except in the most exclusive/expensive neighborhoods (think $5m+ homes on big lots far from one another) where there isn’t much community vibe anyway. You don’t need to worry about that at all in Chevy Chase, DC, for example. Most people are from somewhere else. Truly multigenerational DMV natives are in the minority.

OP here. We work mostly from home and have to go to NYC about 2x a month so being somewhat close to the Amtrak is helpful. Like having some walkability like everyone else somewhat but it's really about having a community.
Yeah yeah political leanings blah blah- DC people are easy to play that way- it becomes easy to figure out which way they lean and then talk that up. Everyone here is so emotionally charged about it. Don't really care-it's all about positioning yourself to make $ off the current environment

IME, it is difficult to find community in the suburbs without children or a congregation.

Anonymous wrote:

DH & I are newbies to the DMV area. We don't have children yet but planning on starting a family soon and who knows what will happen. We liked certain areas of NW DC and then Chevy Chase but would also consider Virginia. We know no one but some random work people in DC and I'm very wary of insular, old established, old money neighborhoods where if you have no connection, it's kind of weird if you are there. I don't care about the MD versus VA debate, we'd live in either- I just don't want to be on a street where every other person inherited their homes from their great Aunt Elda and they all have clear, established networks.
Should we steer clear of NW DC or Chevy Chase? Parts of it gave me that feel.

We lived on the Philadelphia main line a few years back and it was lovely but extremely difficult to be someone who wasn't from there and didn't have roots. Being new to an area and making friends as an adult is hard enough and I don't want to repeat that experience.
Would love to hear your feedback purely on neighborhoods and people's experience moving there as a total newcomer. TIA!

Plop yourself at possible houses and do the drives. We were total newcomers. Over the years it was noticed that CC, NW DC, parts of Bethesda and Alexandria had more multi generation or established connected people. Overall VA is newer. Now some of our kids and their friends who all grew up in the DMV are at the point of or have bought property. Unless it's a relative-family issue all gravitate to best commute for downtown if that is the work location. You drive through residential DC if you live in MD.

Preferred sweet spot is North Arlington, Falls Church, central or eastern Mclean. Latter is great if one works downtown and another Tysons or tech corridor.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, where do you commute from? Commuting time should probably be #1 on your list of priorities if you are genuinely indifferent between MD and VA. Also, I wouldn’t dismiss the MD/VA debate so casually because in the DMV your political leanings can create community and/or make you feel like a fish out of water. This is a very political region (for obvious reasons) so if you lean left or right at all, the MD/VA debate is relevant.

I agree with PP that your worry of being shut out of long-established networks is not likely to happen except in the most exclusive/expensive neighborhoods (think $5m+ homes on big lots far from one another) where there isn’t much community vibe anyway. You don’t need to worry about that at all in Chevy Chase, DC, for example. Most people are from somewhere else. Truly multigenerational DMV natives are in the minority.

OP here. We work mostly from home and have to go to NYC about 2x a month so being somewhat close to the Amtrak is helpful. Like having some walkability like everyone else somewhat but it's really about having a community.
Yeah yeah political leanings blah blah- DC people are easy to play that way- it becomes easy to figure out which way they lean and then talk that up. Everyone here is so emotionally charged about it. Don't really care-it's all about positioning yourself to make $ off the current environment

More NY/NJ people I noticed live in Maryland side. I live in Bethesda/Potomac border and we drive back and forth NY twice a year. I also take Amtrak to NY for work 2-3 times a year.

BTW I always go to BWI as it is $9 a day to park. I can park right next to platform in secure lot. Going to DC then getting out and waiting for Uber or redline is time consuming and you double back. I do NYC same day trips.

Similar to PP, My fiancee and I recently moved to Alexandria from the Bay Area and are really enjoying it. We've haven't noticed the traffic - we live within walking distance of King St station so my fiancee takes the VRE into work, and I'm fully remote. We've liked the sense of community - friendly and welcoming, but not overbearing.

As an Alexandria resident I’d actually disagree with the PPs. We moved here from nyc (which we found very much what you’re afraid of) and have actually found Alexandria to exceed all expectations. We did move to nw initially and found it a bit insular. Chevy chase seems to be about which club you belong to. Yes, Alexandria has traffic but it’s just for a few blocks on Washington st and most of duke st during rush hour. We both travel to nyc regularly and walk or take the trolley to the king st station and get the metro liner. There are a few areas that flood (oddly not by the river), but it’s the same ones over and over, so easy to avoid.

Anonymous wrote:I would also recommend avoiding Alexandria. It is also a transient setting but the locals are annoying, still screaming about bike lanes and are resistant to change. Charming waterfront, horrible town politics. Great to visit but not to live.

Arlington is much nicer though. Closer to all things that matter, and just is a better run jurisdiction.

+1 it's the worst of DC in one: bad traffic since the Parkway is the main road and is usually backed up, awful local politics (near Barry-level corruption and incompetence), and the river floods when it rains. Hard pass. Gorgeous area to visit, though.

I would also recommend avoiding Alexandria. It is also a transient setting but the locals are annoying, still screaming about bike lanes and are resistant to change. Charming waterfront, horrible town politics. Great to visit but not to live.

Arlington is much nicer though. Closer to all things that matter, and just is a better run jurisdiction.

Chevy Chase MD isn't an old money community (former resident for 20 years). It's an old streetcar suburb, so it has older prewar architecture than most high-end DC suburbs, but old architecture doesn't make it old money (DC doesn't really have much old money, but if it's anywhere it's mostly in pockets of upper NW DC). If you look at Zillow or other sites, you'll see most of the houses in Chevy Chase (even Chevy Chase Village, the toniest part) have flipped since the turn of the century. It's not like Grosse Pointe or Shaker Heights or the Main Line. Actually, nowhere in the DMV is -- there's too constant an inflow of new residents.

Chevy Chase is a high-income, high-education suburb, with among the highest median housing price and HHI in the DC area. There are parts of CC MD that have expensive starter homes, and there are parts that have very expensive forever homes.

DCUM has a lot of people who project interpretations onto things they don't understand. Since Chevy Chase has a lot of old foursquares and tudors on modest lots rather than McMansions on multi-acre spreads, some DCUMers who gravitate toward McMansions like to project that life in Chevy Chase must be kind of like the Gilded Age. It's not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, where do you commute from? Commuting time should probably be #1 on your list of priorities if you are genuinely indifferent between MD and VA. Also, I wouldn’t dismiss the MD/VA debate so casually because in the DMV your political leanings can create community and/or make you feel like a fish out of water. This is a very political region (for obvious reasons) so if you lean left or right at all, the MD/VA debate is relevant.

I agree with PP that your worry of being shut out of long-established networks is not likely to happen except in the most exclusive/expensive neighborhoods (think $5m+ homes on big lots far from one another) where there isn’t much community vibe anyway. You don’t need to worry about that at all in Chevy Chase, DC, for example. Most people are from somewhere else. Truly multigenerational DMV natives are in the minority.

OP here. We work mostly from home and have to go to NYC about 2x a month so being somewhat close to the Amtrak is helpful. Like having some walkability like everyone else somewhat but it's really about having a community.
Yeah yeah political leanings blah blah- DC people are easy to play that way- it becomes easy to figure out which way they lean and then talk that up. Everyone here is so emotionally charged about it. Don't really care-it's all about positioning yourself to make $ off the current environment

Nah, many people here and in those neighborhoods feel passionately about politics. You can be neutral but if you’re a jerk about it like in that post, yeah, it’s going to be tougher to make friends. Anywhere.

Any reason you’ve ruled out downtown Bethesda? There are tons of NYC transplants there - you’d be right at home.