Anonymous wrote:I almost hope you are a troll. This is the craziest thing ever.

I was thinking this was a late night bored troll. No one could be this ridiculous.

Anonymous wrote:My kids' own dad has missed their birthdays multiple times due to work travel. It happens.

+1 it's not the end of the world for the kid. You can make it special regardless and teach them life happens too.

OP, please drive it into your thick head, before you destroy another relationship, that birthdays and similar milestones are NOT that important to celebrate on the actual day. I don't believe we've ever celebrated our anniversary on the day - we just push it back to the weekend. When we have stuff going on, we feel better moving the birthday rather than the work or the scheduled event. That way we can really enjoy the milestone without stress.

Yeah. Unreasonable expectation. Dh and i have missed kids bdays over the years. We celebrate later and there is a call on the day. Its not a big deal. .

Team boyfriend.

You’re of course unreasonable, but dump him for being such a pathetic simp who goes along with you. Find a man.

That's an overreaction. Plus, he's just your boyfriend. Her actual father probably doesn't even want him there. You sound like you're forcing your boyfriend into your daughter's life.

I almost hope you are a troll. This is the craziest thing ever.

Oh my gosh, this is a huge red flag - for HIM. An ultimatum? That’s a very alarming level of crazy.

Unanimous decision on DCUM - unheard of.

Sorry, OP, I agree that he (or even a bio parent) can miss a birthday. I think you are being unreasonable.

Mom here and I have on occasion missed my own biological children’s birthdays for work travel. I video chat them the day of and we celebrate as a family on a different day. Totally not a big deal. I think the fact that you are making such a big deal about this is absolutely nuts and speaks to your own relationship insecurities. You’re going to end up driving him away with these kind of unreasonable demands/ “tests of his commitment”.

OP how is going to a work conference an actual DEALBREAKER??!

Help me understand.

He needs to work, your daughter’s birthday can always be celebrated on another day.

You truly owe this man an apology.

You're way out of line OP.

Anonymous wrote:What in the world?! You are out of your mind. He should not miss a conference for her birthday! That seems insane. My husband has had to be out of town for work during my birthday and our kids birthdays several times, it would never occur to me to ask him to delay a work trip because of that.

Celebrate her birthday the day before!

THIS!