Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Malpractice and suing culture, plus recruiting business from high stress parents obsessed with their kids being “the best” at everything, including health.

+1

Spouse is a physician. Hates some of the things that get done, but needs to do so due to malpractice.

We have really moving letters from patients about how much spouse has gone above and beyond the level of care that can be expected. One patient even offered a very lucrative first dib at their real estate, but we politely declined. All this to say, spouse is not a selfish person looking out for their own interests. If my spouse says that they have to do unnecessary procedures to protect themselves from malpractice and lawsuits, there is a problem in the system.

Well, there isn’t a malpractice case unless there is a bad outcome. If your husband is doing procedures in order to prevent a bad outcome, then are they really unnecessary??
If he knows that the tests/procedures are unnecessary and nothing bad will happen to the patient if he doesn’t do them, then what is he worried about being sued for?

Anonymous wrote:I agree with OP. I guess the problem is that these professionals aren't capable of telling apart who really needs help and who doesn't. Ultimately, we know our children best, even if the professionals don't respect that fact.

Actually, when it comes to diagnosis, you don’t. The professionals do. You just THINK you do and you see everything through parental-tinted glasses.

Because specialists are terrified of being sued.

I agree with OP. I guess the problem is that these professionals aren't capable of telling apart who really needs help and who doesn't. Ultimately, we know our children best, even if the professionals don't respect that fact.

Majority of this stuff you should do on your own, outsourcing a professional is your choice. Nothing you described is actually intervention, it’s just testing and suggestions.

Anonymous wrote:Wow, OP, you have a charmed life. Both of my kids have SN though one of them "graduated" out of them with the help of years of therapies. Neither of them was flagged by their ped or anyone other than me noticing that things were a little off. One of them is autistic but didn't get diagnosed until age 7 because neither his dr, the public school system, nor the therapists we were seeing alerted us. I started reading up and saw that he and several male members of both sides of the family are classic HFA. He's doing great now, after TONS of intervention, but he will obviously always be autistic.

You must not be aware of the wait lists to get services. It can easily be 9-12 months to get a full diagnostic work up. Most OT's have waitlists as do most mental health professionals. Forget trying to get your suicidal kid an in-patient placement.

Enjoy your life and realize that people are just trying to help you, not line their pockets. Don't ever post on the SN board. We find refuge over there.

You are melodramatic and need to stay on the SN board if General Parenting posts affect you this much.

Wow, OP, you have a charmed life. Both of my kids have SN though one of them "graduated" out of them with the help of years of therapies. Neither of them was flagged by their ped or anyone other than me noticing that things were a little off. One of them is autistic but didn't get diagnosed until age 7 because neither his dr, the public school system, nor the therapists we were seeing alerted us. I started reading up and saw that he and several male members of both sides of the family are classic HFA. He's doing great now, after TONS of intervention, but he will obviously always be autistic.

You must not be aware of the wait lists to get services. It can easily be 9-12 months to get a full diagnostic work up. Most OT's have waitlists as do most mental health professionals. Forget trying to get your suicidal kid an in-patient placement.

Enjoy your life and realize that people are just trying to help you, not line their pockets. Don't ever post on the SN board. We find refuge over there.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Malpractice and suing culture, plus recruiting business from high stress parents obsessed with their kids being “the best” at everything, including health.

+1

Spouse is a physician. Hates some of the things that get done, but needs to do so due to malpractice.

We have really moving letters from patients about how much spouse has gone above and beyond the level of care that can be expected. One patient even offered a very lucrative first dib at their real estate, but we politely declined. All this to say, spouse is not a selfish person looking out for their own interests. If my spouse says that they have to do unnecessary procedures to protect themselves from malpractice and lawsuits, there is a problem in the system.

Anonymous wrote:Malpractice and suing culture, plus recruiting business from high stress parents obsessed with their kids being “the best” at everything, including health.

+1

Anonymous wrote:This is what happens when communities have excessive resources.

Yeah, this. And overly competitive parents. OP, sometimes you just have to smile, nod, & say you’ll think about it or you’d like to wait a year.

Anonymous wrote:Malpractice and suing culture, plus recruiting business from high stress parents obsessed with their kids being “the best” at everything, including health.

This.

It has nothing to do with job security.

Medical providers especially want to make sure they advise any possibility of malpractice in the future. It is fine to turn down an additional test or screening if you don’t want it.

Anonymous wrote:It’s great that you know everything and have so many areas of expertise!
As a parent I have actually never had any interventions. One of my kids flagged something in the system for speech evaluation, but no one ever followed up. Same kid is a very picky eater and appears to have inherited my ADHD - but we can’t get him evaluated because he stays on his growth curve and is exceptionally well behaved at school. We are a white UMC family in an affluent school district - so if specialists were looking for money I’d think we (or any of our neighbors and friends) would be easy targets. We live in a neighborhood where people pay over $100/hr for reading tutors for 7 yr olds or pay $40 per 30 min swim lesson.

I think if people are approaching you with concern, perhaps you should listen or get a 2nd opinion. Most parents have to beg and plead to get evaluated - and then wait months to be seen - even when they are full-pay. I don’t think most people suggesting assessments or interventions are working to fill their rosters with kids that don’t need any help.

I promise you there are many professionals willing to take your money to evaluate your child for ADHD. If you’re asking the school and your child has no issues in school- that’s a different storyline.

I wouldn’t put it like this but as the mom of a child who has several mild-moderate SN I do think there is a lot out there that is *helpful* but not necessary. So much of evaluating children is just compared to the theoretical average that virtually every kid is going to be off that in some way or another. And now we have ways to help those kids, which I think is fine, but people should be clear that some of these things are not going to be that beneficial. I ended up crying on the phone to our primary pediatrician after yet another appointment with where a specialist listed off a bunch of other time consuming and expensive things we could try. And thankfully she gave me great advice to pick the most important things but to make sure my DD got to be a kid and had time to play and do things for fun too. I really needed permission from her to do that, even though I already knew it in my heart. Some things have improved on their own more than expected with time and maturity and of course we do the most essential and evidence based things consistently and keep reevaluating if new real needs pop up.