My grandma’s last words to me were “why are you trying to murder me?”

For the record, I was a terrific granddaughter and never tried to kill anyone!

I don't think it has anything whatsoever to do with you or your relationship with your dad, or his thinking about you and your sister, etc.

I call my kids the wrong names ALL THE TIME and I'm healthy and conscious. I just put them in the category of "child" and then my brain calls up one randomly. The same way that sometimes when I try to learn Spanish French comes out.

That said, it doesn't mean he didn't favor your sister, and I am sorry for that if true.

When my dad was dying of cancer, he was very heavily drugged with morphine and fentanyl. He referred to one of my children as his dear niece. He had always called another one of my kids Claire Bear, but when he was dying, he enthusiastically greeted her as Grizzly Bear. He said some things that simply made no sense.

Your dad recognized you as a dear loved one and he was doing his best to communicate that, but thoughts and language get jumbled when you’re close to death. I’m sorry it was triggering for you. I understand why it was. But I really think your dad was feeling love for you in that moment.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Hugs.

It's the state he's in OP. I'm sorry.

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is honestly drugs/dementia.

OP, before they had the Michael Jackson drug, I had to have an operation and apparently not only did I tell my brand new DH that the surgeon was hot, but then I told a nurse that I was scared to have kids bc I was scared to go into labor etc.

I walked out of that operation and the nurse caught me in the parking lot and I didn't know what she was talking about. And my new DH was sulking.

So, regarding the truth: Doctor was in good shape but my DH is cuter. Had not given much thought to the labor process at that point in my life. I wonder if something I saw right before the drug hit made me spin out like that.

So just saying, it really could be something like, your Dad saw your sister last time he was lucid so thinks he's still in THAT conversation. Or her name was mentioned. I think it's a mistake to assume it's some deep-seated thing vs. a recent trivial trigger.

Oh honey this is nothing people don't really recognize anyone in this state. Think nothing of it.

Anonymous wrote:It’s not a Freudian slip, OP. Dementia doesn’t work like that. He told YOU he loves you. His “names” part of the brain just messed up.

I agree with this completely.

My grandmother talked to people that weren’t in the room the last week of her life. Full conversations. She also only had the bandwidth or interest to talk to one of us. But she did hold my hand. The chemistry of dying makes the brain do funny things. It was likely not meant as you heard it.