Anonymous wrote:I disagree that softball is a sport for kids who need an activity. I agree with the poster who says softball players are smart and gritty. My observation and reason for suggesting the sport is that many girls start softball relatively later (vs. kindergarten or even younger for soccer, gymnastics, dance), and there is a lot of fun/team spirit.

I just want to add somethings on softball and why my girl may have preferred it over soccer and basketball (which she also likes and you can practice solo).
It just worked better with her brain and she liked it. You have clear and defined areas to cover. You use your hands, which is easier than your feet to control a ball (soccer). It has short bursts of running, to bases or to catch a ball. It was a relatively slow paced game 2 hrs a game coach pitch, then 3-4 hours a game kid pitch). She’s just never bored playing these long games! You watch the ball and know who’s at what base and then quickly react to the ball off the bat. One single focus point.

For whatever reason she could read a pitch and bat well- a technical skill and hand/eye coordination. And could field well.
She seems to like that no one was running or racing at her to steal the ball, and could easily understand co-covering an infield area or backing up an infielder versus her soccer games of moving the ball in a formation or “creating a breakaway moment” plus shoulder slamming someone plus the footwork plus the constant jogging and running.

Anyhow, Op- great that you are trying out lots of stuff but make it clear she needs ti pick one team sport and one individual sport to practice and get better at. Then stick with it or do one serious and the other rec level. And keep up the art work and strengths there!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If she isn't competitive or aggressive, softball and volleyball are terrible suggestions. They are some of the smartest ad grittiest athletes I have ever seen.

Golf, dance, poms, dive, karate, yoga, and keep up with swimming.

lol. Softball is the kids who needed an activity

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRhi3oTgWaU

Anonymous wrote:Our 10 yo DD played soccer this year and didn’t love it. Shes not a super fast runner and she’s deff not skilled but she enjoyed just being social - she doesn’t think she wants to continue soccer though. She’s done tennis camps in the past and doesn’t want to try again. She likes swimming but not in winter. She will try some basketball camps this summer. Problem is she’s not aggressive and doesn’t get competitive on a sports field/court. Am I forcing sports on her (I want her to be physically active - I know she isn’t a gifted athlete) or will a sport eventually click? Should we juts keep trying different things? She never showed any interest in sports until she was in 4th grade summer.

Any sport suggestions?

My girl like this settled on softball and swimming. Didn’t thrive at anything with a ton of running or contact sports or “read the field & communicate” sports. She also has pretty cool upper body strength. Squash would be a good pace for her too, or rowing.

Her little sister is the opposite and loves fast moving team sports, with the right these they do awesome plays because they all think ahead, run, and communicate while playing. And want to win.

Anonymous wrote:I disagree that softball is a sport for kids who need an activity. I agree with the poster who says softball players are smart and gritty. My observation and reason for suggesting the sport is that many girls start softball relatively later (vs. kindergarten or even younger for soccer, gymnastics, dance), and there is a lot of fun/team spirit.

Yes, there are a lot of rec softball leagues that can be good for fun, but once you get into more competitive leagues and high school, it is an insanely hard sport to play and learn. The NCAA softball is the highest grossest woman's college sport and has the highest tv viewership for female sports, and is 3rd overall in all college sports after football and men's basketball. The WCWS has higher ratings than most MLB games. Tune in to ESPN tomorrow night to watch them and see if those athletes are the ones that "need a sport" Most of them were multi sport athletes playing volleyball, track, and/or basketball who chose softball to play in college.

Anonymous wrote:Our 10 yo DD played soccer this year and didn’t love it. Shes not a super fast runner and she’s deff not skilled but she enjoyed just being social - she doesn’t think she wants to continue soccer though. She’s done tennis camps in the past and doesn’t want to try again. She likes swimming but not in winter. She will try some basketball camps this summer. Problem is she’s not aggressive and doesn’t get competitive on a sports field/court. Am I forcing sports on her (I want her to be physically active - I know she isn’t a gifted athlete) or will a sport eventually click? Should we juts keep trying different things? She never showed any interest in sports until she was in 4th grade summer.

Any sport suggestions?

Sounds like Ultimate Frisbee would be perfect for her.

Volleyball, basketball and rock climbing, maybe golf or crew also. Other option might be sailing or horseback riding. (more leisure activities) my niece just started speed skating at 13.

Well darn -- you have to be a parent here.

First -- you and any other adults involved with your child have to spend a little time considering what may work for your kid. She may be the world's best dressage rider, but if you cannot afford the time and money costs that is not going to happen.

You also have to consider - carefully - your kid. What are her athletic abilities now, and likely to be in the future with some time and attention, and her willingness to contribute time and attention. Quite a bit depends on her future growth. She is 11. When she is 17 how tall will she be? If she is headed to close to 6 feet then there are some obvious selections to pursue. Is she heavy right now? Would a good first step be simply focusing on improving her fitness level? Is she not aggressive because she does not know what she should be doing, or is that her personality?

All of those kinds of things are discussions that you and other involved adults need to have and consider. And -- the big thing -- like many things people do -- kid sports are a slow, incremental improvement thing. Your kid does not show and start excelling at a sport they have never done. Kids who lack confidence and who are not physically active need even more time to learn, adjust and improve.

Step 2 is to really consider what you and your family can handle in terms of her participation. Sports are not something you can drop or add based on how your day is going. What kind of time and money can your family spend on kid sports. Some sports cost more than others. Some sports take more time than others. No sport is free and easy.

Step 3: After you have carefully considered what you can do, and what may possibly work well for your kid now and in the future -- then you can sit down with your kid and have some conversations about options. You need to know the options before even beginning the conversations.

Frankly -- my suggestions with an 11 year old girl at this point would be:

1. Find a good age appropriate fitness program at a gym or club that she can do almost every day to substantially improve her fitness levels. This will increase her self confidence in a few weeks and make her better prepared to jump in.

2. Find a summer swim program that she can join right now. Again -- this will improve her fitness level and make her a competent swimmer which is an important life long skill. At 11 you can be very up front with her that the goal is not to turn her into a competitive swimmer. She can decide to swim the meets or not -- entirely up to her. But, she has to practice every day with the goal to improve her fitness and to become a good safe swimmer. It will take a couple of summers to get really good enough, but she will see the improvement very quickly. Between that and the gym she will be much more fit and self-confidence by the end of summer.

3 Decide if her foot speed is due to being slow, or not being in shape, or not trying hard to push herself, or not being confident in what she is doing, or some combination. The ability to run fast for more than a short distance factors into what sports she may or may not be best suited. Kids can be big and quick, but you would not be looking to get them into a 100m foot race. But -- those kids might be great at volleyball or basketball.

At 11 she is not too old to "start" any sport, but there is catching up that has to be done for sports that kids have been playing at a more competitive level since 8 or 9. She can catch up so no sport is excluded at this point. Other sports have not really started to be competitive yet for girls -- volleyball, basketball, track/cross-country, lacrosse, field hockey, wrestling, and others. Take a look at the sports offered at her middle school and her likely high school. Other than soccer and maybe (depending on the area) softball -- almost every kid will be "new" to the sport.

Good luck

Middle school dance and cheer? Our middle school has a dance team and it has way less serious dancers than the dance studios.

Field hockey usually starts later and not hard to figure out (like lax). A lot of freshman teams at high schools are even no-cut.

I disagree that softball is a sport for kids who need an activity. I agree with the poster who says softball players are smart and gritty. My observation and reason for suggesting the sport is that many girls start softball relatively later (vs. kindergarten or even younger for soccer, gymnastics, dance), and there is a lot of fun/team spirit.

Anonymous wrote:If she isn't competitive or aggressive, softball and volleyball are terrible suggestions. They are some of the smartest ad grittiest athletes I have ever seen.

Golf, dance, poms, dive, karate, yoga, and keep up with swimming.

lol. Softball is the kids who needed an activity

If she isn't competitive or aggressive, softball and volleyball are terrible suggestions. They are some of the smartest ad grittiest athletes I have ever seen.

Golf, dance, poms, dive, karate, yoga, and keep up with swimming.

OP here - thank you to everyone who pitched in. Have some really great ideas!! I'll ask her what she thinks of all these great ideas. She actually did ballet for five years, but she's not very flexible and didn't want to continue. I don't think she's an athlete, as I've said before. I just want her to be literate in athletics so she can have a healthy lifestyle in the future. She's very academic and she also loves crafting and making clay sculptures so who knows maybe she'll pursue that as her main passion. Sports is definitely hard to experiment in after a certain age, because as you all know, it gets too advanced/competitive too quickly. It's almost as if a late bloomer doesn't really have a chance, but oh well! Thanks again!

You can start martial arts at any age and not be behind. I started at 47!

It's hard, because so many kids start sports really early and are all in from age 8 or so. I think if your daughter LIKES experimenting and dropping in and out of sports, that's great. But it's tough to feel successful doing that, because some kids are already very good and they practice all year long.

That said, track is always fantastic and has a large variety of events, so something would probably click. Field hockey is a tough sport, but lots of kids try it for the first time in middle school. Crew, fencing, volleyball, are all OK for late starters. I like that you're listening to her and not forcing her.