Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 16:01     Subject: Re:In laws don’t wash hands
Anonymous wrote:They are also blowing nose without washing hands.

Into a tissue or they are blowing their nose into their hands?
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:59     Subject: Re:In laws don’t wash hands
They are also blowing nose without washing hands.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:56     Subject: In laws don’t wash hands
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I struggle with this, too, OP (and a giant eye roll to people who don't understand a little hyperbole - I'm sure they SOMETIMES wash their hands but not as often, or in as many circumstances, as you do or would like them to do). My husband learned his hygiene from his parents and so - yeah. Anyway.

I mostly just try to put it out of my head because otherwise I am going to be disgusted and rude, and ruin everyone's good time including my own. I trust the magic of stomach acid to do its job - or at least that's how I talk myself down from my disgust spiral.

I really love my in laws - and obviously my spouse - and so I try as much as I possibly can not to make this an issue. Except to myself

On the other hand I let my cats drink out of my water glasses, and I can't imagine my in laws enjoy watching that - so we all have our accomodations.


Op here. Thanks for giving me real advice. I am kind of a germaphobe so it’s hard to handle not seeing people wash their hands before they eat or prepare food. I’ll try to think of what you said about stomach acid lol.


I am PP and truly, I get it. I really, really do. I'd say read up on stomach acid and do a refresher every time you go visit.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:52     Subject: In laws don’t wash hands
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I struggle with this, too, OP (and a giant eye roll to people who don't understand a little hyperbole - I'm sure they SOMETIMES wash their hands but not as often, or in as many circumstances, as you do or would like them to do). My husband learned his hygiene from his parents and so - yeah. Anyway.

I mostly just try to put it out of my head because otherwise I am going to be disgusted and rude, and ruin everyone's good time including my own. I trust the magic of stomach acid to do its job - or at least that's how I talk myself down from my disgust spiral.

I really love my in laws - and obviously my spouse - and so I try as much as I possibly can not to make this an issue. Except to myself

On the other hand I let my cats drink out of my water glasses, and I can't imagine my in laws enjoy watching that - so we all have our accomodations.


Op here. Thanks for giving me real advice. I am kind of a germaphobe so it’s hard to handle not seeing people wash their hands before they eat or prepare food. I’ll try to think of what you said about stomach acid lol.

That is a weird thing to be grossed out about. Her unwashed hands touching her own food shouldn’t bother you. If they do, you need mental health help to work through the fixation.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:42     Subject: Re:In laws don’t wash hands
Anonymous wrote:I feel your pain, OP. My MIL would lick her fingers while cooking, run them through her hair, brush them off on her clothes. It made DH almost as sick as it made me but he was the one to address it with her. I would never have said anything.


Op here. OMG yes! She licks her hands so much when she’s cooking and then serves us. I try to hint at me serving my food myself but it never works.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:40     Subject: In laws don’t wash hands
Anonymous wrote:I struggle with this, too, OP (and a giant eye roll to people who don't understand a little hyperbole - I'm sure they SOMETIMES wash their hands but not as often, or in as many circumstances, as you do or would like them to do). My husband learned his hygiene from his parents and so - yeah. Anyway.

I mostly just try to put it out of my head because otherwise I am going to be disgusted and rude, and ruin everyone's good time including my own. I trust the magic of stomach acid to do its job - or at least that's how I talk myself down from my disgust spiral.

I really love my in laws - and obviously my spouse - and so I try as much as I possibly can not to make this an issue. Except to myself

On the other hand I let my cats drink out of my water glasses, and I can't imagine my in laws enjoy watching that - so we all have our accomodations.


Op here. Thanks for giving me real advice. I am kind of a germaphobe so it’s hard to handle not seeing people wash their hands before they eat or prepare food. I’ll try to think of what you said about stomach acid lol.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:40     Subject: Re:In laws don’t wash hands
I watch people in their own kitchen handle raw chicken, rinse hands for 2 secs (no soap), and dry raw chicken fingers on dish towels they dry dishes with. No dishwasher at house.

I replace the towels, sneak cleaning, and hope for the best.

Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:40     Subject: Re:In laws don’t wash hands
I feel your pain, OP. My MIL would lick her fingers while cooking, run them through her hair, brush them off on her clothes. It made DH almost as sick as it made me but he was the one to address it with her. I would never have said anything.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:39     Subject: In laws don’t wash hands
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Just cook your own food if you don’t like it, you sound picky to me.

I’m at their home right now for Memorial Day


I assume there’s food and a kitchen, what stops you from cooking it yourself?

So I should be cooking in my mil kitchen?


Yes. You should offer to help cook if nothing is up to your standards.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:38     Subject: In laws don’t wash hands
Anonymous wrote:I struggle with this, too, OP (and a giant eye roll to people who don't understand a little hyperbole - I'm sure they SOMETIMES wash their hands but not as often, or in as many circumstances, as you do or would like them to do). My husband learned his hygiene from his parents and so - yeah. Anyway.

I mostly just try to put it out of my head because otherwise I am going to be disgusted and rude, and ruin everyone's good time including my own. I trust the magic of stomach acid to do its job - or at least that's how I talk myself down from my disgust spiral.

I really love my in laws - and obviously my spouse - and so I try as much as I possibly can not to make this an issue. Except to myself

On the other hand I let my cats drink out of my water glasses, and I can't imagine my in laws enjoy watching that - so we all have our accomodations.


*accommodations*
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:38     Subject: In laws don’t wash hands
I struggle with this, too, OP (and a giant eye roll to people who don't understand a little hyperbole - I'm sure they SOMETIMES wash their hands but not as often, or in as many circumstances, as you do or would like them to do). My husband learned his hygiene from his parents and so - yeah. Anyway.

I mostly just try to put it out of my head because otherwise I am going to be disgusted and rude, and ruin everyone's good time including my own. I trust the magic of stomach acid to do its job - or at least that's how I talk myself down from my disgust spiral.

I really love my in laws - and obviously my spouse - and so I try as much as I possibly can not to make this an issue. Except to myself

On the other hand I let my cats drink out of my water glasses, and I can't imagine my in laws enjoy watching that - so we all have our accomodations.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:38     Subject: In laws don’t wash hands
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Does your mil wash dishes? Take a shower? Rinse things off in the sink? I doubt her hands are really as dirty as you think.

Yes. No. No

I meant. Yes. Yes. No


Your mother in law doesn’t use her kitchen sink? I think you are exaggerating.

I’m not exaggerating, you said rinse things off in the sink. I haven’t seen that before
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:37     Subject: In laws don’t wash hands
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Does your mil wash dishes? Take a shower? Rinse things off in the sink? I doubt her hands are really as dirty as you think.

Yes. No. No

I meant. Yes. Yes. No


She washes dishes but doesn't use the sink? And showers? Sounds like soap hits her hands pretty often.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:36     Subject: Re:In laws don’t wash hands
Meh. I don’t really wash my hands much at home either. After the bathroom for #2 and after handling raw meat and that’s about it. My family and I have all survived.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2022 15:35     Subject: In laws don’t wash hands
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Does your mil wash dishes? Take a shower? Rinse things off in the sink? I doubt her hands are really as dirty as you think.

Yes. No. No

I meant. Yes. Yes. No


Your mother in law doesn’t use her kitchen sink? I think you are exaggerating.