Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 17:33     Subject: How irritated would you be?

How long is the camp? 2 weeks or all summer?
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 17:32     Subject: How irritated would you be?

If the kids are excited about this find a way to make it work he can do pick up and drop off or find a sitter
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 17:28     Subject: Re:How irritated would you be?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would tell him it won’t work and unenroll them — even if I lost my money on it.


They're too excited for that.


Too bad. Tell them sometimes things don’t work out. It will be good roll modeling whether you have sons or daughters to explain that you cannot just take off in the middle of work and logistics need to be determined before anyone signs up for anything.


Role modeling


That's not what the kids would take away from this
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 17:01     Subject: Re:How irritated would you be?

Unenroll them and don't tell him until he asks about it.
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:58     Subject: Re:How irritated would you be?

Anonymous wrote:I'd be irritated that he didn't talk it through, but I have to say, try to see it from the point of view from most of us whose husbands wouldn't spend a minute thinking or planning kids' actitivities. I would compromise and try to make it work.


He did think it through. He assumed that OP would solve the scheduling problem.
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:57     Subject: Re:How irritated would you be?

Anonymous wrote:I'd be irritated that he didn't talk it through, but I have to say, try to see it from the point of view from most of us whose husbands wouldn't spend a minute thinking or planning kids' actitivities. I would compromise and try to make it work.

No, arranging something like this and getting the kids excited is worse than not doing anything. If your spouse doesn’t do anything, at least you know the things that are arranged will work for you, because you arranged them. This is closer to sabotage, which is worse than indifference.
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:55     Subject: How irritated would you be?

Anonymous wrote:His choice. His problem.

He takes time off or he pays someone to do drop off/pick up.

Full stop.


This. It’s not your problem. “It doesn’t work with my schedule, sorry. Hopefully you can flex your hours that week or find a sitter to help with driving.” That’s all he needs to know.
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:54     Subject: How irritated would you be?

That's 3 hours a day of driving! No way can anyone just disappear for 3 hours a day without anyone noticing at work.
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:27     Subject: How irritated would you be?

What was the plan for the kids otherwise? Was DH supposed to be in charge of finding a camp for them and chose poorly? Or were they going to be home watching tv while you WFH and DH thought this would help you with work? Or were you going to enroll them in a different camp that works better but DH thinks they need the STEM camp?

I think how mad you get depends on the context.
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:24     Subject: Re:How irritated would you be?

Women putting up with this nonsense is how we end up bearing the kid load too much of the time. Just tell them all “no.” Your children will get over it and your husband needs to see you are not a pushover and that your job matters.
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:24     Subject: How irritated would you be?

Do you know anyone else attending? If so, see if you can pay that person?

Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:23     Subject: Re:How irritated would you be?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would tell him it won’t work and unenroll them — even if I lost my money on it.


They're too excited for that.


Too bad. Tell them sometimes things don’t work out. It will be good roll modeling whether you have sons or daughters to explain that you cannot just take off in the middle of work and logistics need to be determined before anyone signs up for anything.


Role modeling
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:22     Subject: Re:How irritated would you be?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would tell him it won’t work and unenroll them — even if I lost my money on it.


They're too excited for that.


Too bad. Tell them sometimes things don’t work out. It will be good roll modeling whether you have sons or daughters to explain that you cannot just take off in the middle of work and logistics need to be determined before anyone signs up for anything.
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:21     Subject: How irritated would you be?

How long does the camp run? The whole summer?
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2022 16:17     Subject: Re:How irritated would you be?

I'd be irritated that he didn't talk it through, but I have to say, try to see it from the point of view from most of us whose husbands wouldn't spend a minute thinking or planning kids' actitivities. I would compromise and try to make it work.