Anonymous
Post 04/07/2022 07:29     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:Am I expected to pay for their room? They are a large group and make what we make or more .

I have offered to pay for my siblings' rooms, since they are traveling even further and are on limited incomes.

Am I expected to cover food for the weekend also?

If they pay for their travel, should I say no gifts are necessary?

None of these people are wealthy, more like UMC.

Thanks.



Just have plenty of good at home, get some stuff catered so if someone wants to eat at your home, they feel welcome. No need to pay for anybody’s hotel unless they are your parents and you don’t have space at home and don’t want them to spend on hotels.
Anonymous
Post 04/07/2022 06:33     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
I plan to cover dinner out the night before and after. I expect there to be some argument over that. That saud, the family members who are coming all approached us and said they would like to be there. We only have 4 tickets so there will be a hotel watch party
Anonymous
Post 04/07/2022 06:06     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
One meal. That's it.
Anonymous
Post 04/07/2022 04:53     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Stop feeding the troll who pretends to pay for everything and let's help OP!

No, you do not offer to pay for anyone's travel or accommodations. It is very generous that you are doing this for your siblings. My suggestion is to have one big meal/dinner, that all are invited to, that you cover the costs. Could be out to a restaurant, catered at your home, or even a back yard BBQ. Gift is for your graduating child, not you, so please do not say no gifts.

That is the social norm.
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 23:54     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Basic life rule, don't invite people unless your are prepared to pay for them. I wouldn't even think of asking them to pay for anything.


What planet are you from? This is not a “basic life rule” anywhere.


We were raised differentially. It is called hosting, if you are hosting you pay. Especially when is a celebration for someone in YOUR family.



You pay the hotel bills of ALL the people visiting you? So if your child gets married, you will pay the hotel costs for all the guests?


I said you should be prepared to pay for them.

And yes if I invite someone to something like a graduation for my kid. I would pay their way. If I couldn’t afford it. I wouldn’t invite them.

If I invite people to dinner, I pay the bill.


That’s your choice. Who said it’s sine universal rule?
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 23:53     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Basic life rule, don't invite people unless your are prepared to pay for them. I wouldn't even think of asking them to pay for anything.


What planet are you from? This is not a “basic life rule” anywhere.


We were raised differentially. It is called hosting, if you are hosting you pay. Especially when is a celebration for someone in YOUR family.



You pay the hotel bills of ALL the people visiting you? So if your child gets married, you will pay the hotel costs for all the guests?


I said you should be prepared to pay for them.

And yes if I invite someone to something like a graduation for my kid. I would pay their way. If I couldn’t afford it. I wouldn’t invite them.

If I invite people to dinner, I pay the bill.


Are you going to pay travel and hotel costs for every single person you invite to your child’s wedding?
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 22:19     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:Basic life rule, don't invite people unless your are prepared to pay for them. I wouldn't even think of asking them to pay for anything.


Basic rule that I follow. Dont go somewhere you can't afford, grandparents excluded.
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 22:13     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Basic life rule, don't invite people unless your are prepared to pay for them. I wouldn't even think of asking them to pay for anything.


What planet are you from? This is not a “basic life rule” anywhere.


We were raised differentially. It is called hosting, if you are hosting you pay. Especially when is a celebration for someone in YOUR family.



You pay the hotel bills of ALL the people visiting you? So if your child gets married, you will pay the hotel costs for all the guests?


I said you should be prepared to pay for them.

And yes if I invite someone to something like a graduation for my kid. I would pay their way. If I couldn’t afford it. I wouldn’t invite them.

If I invite people to dinner, I pay the bill.



So you would pay for all the guests—friends & family—that attend your child’s wedding. At the very least, you would foot their travel and lodging (“I would pay their way.”)

Like the other poster said, I don’t believe you.


Again as I said prepared to pay the bill.

For our wedding we made sure there was real food available all of the time over a 3 day period. The two hotels we had room blocks at we kept a tab open for guests to use.

Everyone that would be flying in we reached out to and told them that we would really like them to attend and would like to cover the cost of their flights. One family or three took us up on that.

We reached out to everyone about accommodations and let them know about rooms blocks and told them that if they didn’t want to pay for rooms we had some extra rooms they could use. We ended up covering be cost for 6 couples. 4 at hotel 2 in rooms at a house nearby we had rented for grandparents.


This is dumb and nobody believes it, so just stop.


What is dumb about it and why would I make this up?


Because it's not feasible, unless you pay for crappy accommodations or are very wealthy, neither of which applies to most people.

No one does this. Stop pretending it's a thing.
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 22:08     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Basic life rule, don't invite people unless your are prepared to pay for them. I wouldn't even think of asking them to pay for anything.


What planet are you from? This is not a “basic life rule” anywhere.


We were raised differentially. It is called hosting, if you are hosting you pay. Especially when is a celebration for someone in YOUR family.



You pay the hotel bills of ALL the people visiting you? So if your child gets married, you will pay the hotel costs for all the guests?


I said you should be prepared to pay for them.

And yes if I invite someone to something like a graduation for my kid. I would pay their way. If I couldn’t afford it. I wouldn’t invite them.

If I invite people to dinner, I pay the bill.



So you would pay for all the guests—friends & family—that attend your child’s wedding. At the very least, you would foot their travel and lodging (“I would pay their way.”)

Like the other poster said, I don’t believe you.


Again as I said prepared to pay the bill.

For our wedding we made sure there was real food available all of the time over a 3 day period. The two hotels we had room blocks at we kept a tab open for guests to use.

Everyone that would be flying in we reached out to and told them that we would really like them to attend and would like to cover the cost of their flights. One family or three took us up on that.

We reached out to everyone about accommodations and let them know about rooms blocks and told them that if they didn’t want to pay for rooms we had some extra rooms they could use. We ended up covering be cost for 6 couples. 4 at hotel 2 in rooms at a house nearby we had rented for grandparents.


This is dumb and nobody believes it, so just stop.


What is dumb about it and why would I make this up?
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 21:18     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Basic life rule, don't invite people unless your are prepared to pay for them. I wouldn't even think of asking them to pay for anything.


What planet are you from? This is not a “basic life rule” anywhere.


We were raised differentially. It is called hosting, if you are hosting you pay. Especially when is a celebration for someone in YOUR family.



You pay the hotel bills of ALL the people visiting you? So if your child gets married, you will pay the hotel costs for all the guests?


I said you should be prepared to pay for them.

And yes if I invite someone to something like a graduation for my kid. I would pay their way. If I couldn’t afford it. I wouldn’t invite them.

If I invite people to dinner, I pay the bill.



So you would pay for all the guests—friends & family—that attend your child’s wedding. At the very least, you would foot their travel and lodging (“I would pay their way.”)

Like the other poster said, I don’t believe you.


Again as I said prepared to pay the bill.

For our wedding we made sure there was real food available all of the time over a 3 day period. The two hotels we had room blocks at we kept a tab open for guests to use.

Everyone that would be flying in we reached out to and told them that we would really like them to attend and would like to cover the cost of their flights. One family or three took us up on that.

We reached out to everyone about accommodations and let them know about rooms blocks and told them that if they didn’t want to pay for rooms we had some extra rooms they could use. We ended up covering be cost for 6 couples. 4 at hotel 2 in rooms at a house nearby we had rented for grandparents.


This is dumb and nobody believes it, so just stop.
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 20:50     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Basic life rule, don't invite people unless your are prepared to pay for them. I wouldn't even think of asking them to pay for anything.


What planet are you from? This is not a “basic life rule” anywhere.


We were raised differentially. It is called hosting, if you are hosting you pay. Especially when is a celebration for someone in YOUR family.



You pay the hotel bills of ALL the people visiting you? So if your child gets married, you will pay the hotel costs for all the guests?


I said you should be prepared to pay for them.

And yes if I invite someone to something like a graduation for my kid. I would pay their way. If I couldn’t afford it. I wouldn’t invite them.

If I invite people to dinner, I pay the bill.



So you would pay for all the guests—friends & family—that attend your child’s wedding. At the very least, you would foot their travel and lodging (“I would pay their way.”)

Like the other poster said, I don’t believe you.


Again as I said prepared to pay the bill.

For our wedding we made sure there was real food available all of the time over a 3 day period. The two hotels we had room blocks at we kept a tab open for guests to use.

Everyone that would be flying in we reached out to and told them that we would really like them to attend and would like to cover the cost of their flights. One family or three took us up on that.

We reached out to everyone about accommodations and let them know about rooms blocks and told them that if they didn’t want to pay for rooms we had some extra rooms they could use. We ended up covering be cost for 6 couples. 4 at hotel 2 in rooms at a house nearby we had rented for grandparents.
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 20:45     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Basic life rule, don't invite people unless your are prepared to pay for them. I wouldn't even think of asking them to pay for anything.


What planet are you from? This is not a “basic life rule” anywhere.


We were raised differentially. It is called hosting, if you are hosting you pay. Especially when is a celebration for someone in YOUR family.



You pay the hotel bills of ALL the people visiting you? So if your child gets married, you will pay the hotel costs for all the guests?


I said you should be prepared to pay for them.

And yes if I invite someone to something like a graduation for my kid. I would pay their way. If I couldn’t afford it. I wouldn’t invite them.

If I invite people to dinner, I pay the bill.



So you would pay for all the guests—friends & family—that attend your child’s wedding. At the very least, you would foot their travel and lodging (“I would pay their way.”)

Like the other poster said, I don’t believe you.


Stop engaging with that person as you and I know they are lying and not hardly paying the total costs for 200 people to travel to and attend a wedding or any other event.
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 20:28     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Basic life rule, don't invite people unless your are prepared to pay for them. I wouldn't even think of asking them to pay for anything.


What planet are you from? This is not a “basic life rule” anywhere.


We were raised differentially. It is called hosting, if you are hosting you pay. Especially when is a celebration for someone in YOUR family.



You pay the hotel bills of ALL the people visiting you? So if your child gets married, you will pay the hotel costs for all the guests?


I said you should be prepared to pay for them.

And yes if I invite someone to something like a graduation for my kid. I would pay their way. If I couldn’t afford it. I wouldn’t invite them.

If I invite people to dinner, I pay the bill.



So you would pay for all the guests—friends & family—that attend your child’s wedding. At the very least, you would foot their travel and lodging (“I would pay their way.”)

Like the other poster said, I don’t believe you.
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 20:20     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't expect for anyone to cover my hotel room since it is my choice to attend and not a summons, but I would expect to be fed at least one meal -- graduation brunch/lunch or dinner. And the gifts are for the child (for ex I got luggage and spending money) not you so please don't tell people not to do that.


This
Anonymous
Post 04/06/2022 20:13     Subject: Family Friends Will be Traveling to Attend my Son's Graduation
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Basic life rule, don't invite people unless your are prepared to pay for them. I wouldn't even think of asking them to pay for anything.


What planet are you from? This is not a “basic life rule” anywhere.


We were raised differentially. It is called hosting, if you are hosting you pay. Especially when is a celebration for someone in YOUR family.



You pay the hotel bills of ALL the people visiting you? So if your child gets married, you will pay the hotel costs for all the guests?


I said you should be prepared to pay for them.

And yes if I invite someone to something like a graduation for my kid. I would pay their way. If I couldn’t afford it. I wouldn’t invite them.

If I invite people to dinner, I pay the bill.