Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did she actually want you to transfer it to her, or did she want to be added onto the deed? Big difference.

she wanted me to give her the house as in she would own it.

Your wording is still unclear.

Was she asking to add her name to deed along with yours? This is what most people mean when they say they want to own their house.

Or was she asking that you transfer the deed to her name and she would take out a mortgage in her name only for the remaining balance?

Yes, OP, please answer this. Was she asking for you to not be on the deed? You seem to be dodging this question.

Yeah, OP is clearly the nutty one here, if only because his self-flagellation has nothing to do with her expressed reasons for the divorce and he can't see that.

Anonymous wrote:
OP, I’m a SAHM. I didn’t contribute any money towards my house. My husband paid for everything—and will continue to pay for everything. Both our names are on the deed of our house.

Your views are generally incompatible with marriage.

Madam, you are completely wrong, legally and morally. He bought the house before he got married. It's his house.

His wife sounds just like the wife, now ex-wife, of a friend. She was a pure gold-digger, looking to mine every penny from a hard-working man who saved and invested well.

Anonymous wrote:She did a psychological number on you. She sounds awful. Borderline personality.

Please get some therapy to help you see this.

He sounds like he’s the one who has borderline personality disorder.

My friends have all bought houses in the past 10 years snd we’ve all discussed a lot about mortgages and real estate. Everyone has both spouses on the deed of the shared marital home. This holds true when one person contributed the bulk of the equity through a down payment. It’s true if one person contributes the bulk of the mortgage payments because they have the higher paying job. OP’s attitude is the outlier. It’s bizarre enough that it sounds he was projecting some serious issues on his ex wife.

Hope you get help OP.

This is why you discuss finances before marriage.

She did a psychological number on you. She sounds awful. Borderline personality.

Please get some therapy to help you see this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your ex was an idiot to pay toward a house she had no equity in, but it sounds like you’re better off without each other. What’s driving this three years later revisiting? Is she remarrying?

She didn't pay towards the house. I had 80% equity before we got married. She never paid any house payments. We were married 3 years. This wasn't three years ago.

She did though. Every utility bill you split, every improvement, every item of routine maintenance every time she mowed the lawn or called the plumber she was contributing toward your wealth and not her own. Most women will not live under circumstances where the day the ink is dry on a divorce proceeding they are homeless. The only person I know who lives in a home without her name on the title has the loss of equity addressed in her prenup as part of her guaranteed settlement if they divorce and she would never have agreed to live in the house otherwise.

You could have put her on the title and spent $500 at a lawyer writing a prenup to protect your “80% equity” since that was clearly extremely important to you, but you chose not to. Why?

Op, you haven’t responded whether alternative solutions were discussed with her like;
- adding her to title and giving her increase in home value from the date of marriage (prorata mortgage principal and market value increase);
- buying and living together in a new joint house

If you insisted on her living in your house while not creating any joint assets, I would be seriously concerned about such marriage. Homes are the main instrument of savings in the US: it’s like pocketing all family savings by one spouse just because you bought it prior marriage. What the heck? I would rather buy my own with another man !

Anonymous wrote:The ex sounds smart to leave.

Seriously. She dodged a bullet.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
OP, I’m a SAHM. I didn’t contribute any money towards my house. My husband paid for everything—and will continue to pay for everything. Both our names are on the deed of our house.

Your views are generally incompatible with marriage.

You must have bought that house together after marriage? OP owned his house before getting married. There is a difference.

We did buy the house after marriage (it would be stupid to combine finances beforehand.) However, my husband contributed the entire down payment. It wasn’t 80% equity but close to 50%. OP wanted to share a life with his wife but not a house. That’s like being a little bit pregnant — it doesn’t work — and now he’s divorced.

The ex sounds smart to leave.

Anonymous wrote:
OP, I’m a SAHM. I didn’t contribute any money towards my house. My husband paid for everything—and will continue to pay for everything. Both our names are on the deed of our house.

Your views are generally incompatible with marriage.

You must have bought that house together after marriage? OP owned his house before getting married. There is a difference.

Op, your ex is acting greedy and it's good that she left. She don't deserve you. There are tons of other ways of owning joint assets including buying a new house together but she chose to ask for title on which she has no ownership of.

OP, I’m a SAHM. I didn’t contribute any money towards my house. My husband paid for everything—and will continue to pay for everything. Both our names are on the deed of our house.

Your views are generally incompatible with marriage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did she actually want you to transfer it to her, or did she want to be added onto the deed? Big difference.

she wanted me to give her the house as in she would own it.

Your wording is still unclear.

Was she asking to add her name to deed along with yours? This is what most people mean when they say they want to own their house.

Or was she asking that you transfer the deed to her name and she would take out a mortgage in her name only for the remaining balance?