The thing that jumps out the most in your post, OP, is the way you refer to your first born so glowingly. I suspect your eleven year old is trying to get your attention.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Define “stabby things” and “violent ends.” Are we talking, like, being poked repeatedly by sharp pencils, actual weapons and gore?

Is stabbing someone (multiple people)repeatedly with a pencil bc they annoyed you, normal thinking for a kid?

I don’t know, I think it depends on context and medium. If these are meant to be amusing, cartoonish drawings, I’d probably not be too concerned. But I was raised Tom & Jerry and Road Runner cartoons. I think I instinctively knew the difference between cartoonish violence meant to amuse and that which would be more cause for concern.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:…, and loves to take the side of the bad guys when we watch movies or of dictators when we watch the news. She has always said she finds humans terribly unappealing and prefers animals instead…

….When someone annoys her, she employs picturesque depictions of violent ends they will come to, involving stabby things….

The horror part is scary, but leaving that aside, she seems very justice oriented. Her idea of justice might not be yours, nor mainstream, nor correct, but it’s her apparent motivation.

I teach 11 YOs and have two kids of my own. I’d run this second part past the school counselor, OP, whether they were my students or my own kids. Dark poetry and scary, intense stories are normal for this age, yes, but it sounds like you’re describing something different. It sounds like these “picturesque depictions of violent ends they will come to” are about people she actually knows. The fact that you added that these scenarios involve “stabby things” is more concerning.

Talk to the school counselor. They hopefully know your kid, and are trained to deal with this sort of thing.

+1 The school counselor and her pediatrician.

I’d tread very carefully here, OP. If you make a way bigger deal out of this than necessary, you’re potentially going to make her feel confused and ashamed about what she considers a perfectly fine creative outlet. And as she gets to be around 12/13, this could cause some major trust issues between the two of you.

She’s imaging, “employ[ing] picturesque depictions of violent ends… involving stabby things,” for those who annoy her. While
Some of what OP said can be downplayed, this cannot. Liking goth or gore is one thing. Imagining violence on others who simply annoy you is alarming.

+1 Exactly. Op needs to talk to the pediatrician asap. The school probably has a psychologist who can do a quick eval either in person or via Zoom.

Anonymous wrote:Define “stabby things” and “violent ends.” Are we talking, like, being poked repeatedly by sharp pencils, actual weapons and gore?

Is stabbing someone (multiple people)repeatedly with a pencil bc they annoyed you, normal thinking for a kid?

Define “stabby things” and “violent ends.” Are we talking, like, being poked repeatedly by sharp pencils, actual weapons and gore?

Anonymous wrote:She’s a regular kid going through an incredibly cringey phase.

I have a kid like this too, OP. Sometimes I think it's to get a reaction so I try not to react too strongly. I do keep an eye on it though for red flags.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:…, and loves to take the side of the bad guys when we watch movies or of dictators when we watch the news. She has always said she finds humans terribly unappealing and prefers animals instead…

….When someone annoys her, she employs picturesque depictions of violent ends they will come to, involving stabby things….

The horror part is scary, but leaving that aside, she seems very justice oriented. Her idea of justice might not be yours, nor mainstream, nor correct, but it’s her apparent motivation.

I teach 11 YOs and have two kids of my own. I’d run this second part past the school counselor, OP, whether they were my students or my own kids. Dark poetry and scary, intense stories are normal for this age, yes, but it sounds like you’re describing something different. It sounds like these “picturesque depictions of violent ends they will come to” are about people she actually knows. The fact that you added that these scenarios involve “stabby things” is more concerning.

Talk to the school counselor. They hopefully know your kid, and are trained to deal with this sort of thing.

+1 The school counselor and her pediatrician.

I’d tread very carefully here, OP. If you make a way bigger deal out of this than necessary, you’re potentially going to make her feel confused and ashamed about what she considers a perfectly fine creative outlet. And as she gets to be around 12/13, this could cause some major trust issues between the two of you.

+1

She sounds like someone who enjoys the drama of it all vs a budding serial killer. Yes, make sure she’s not serious about stabbing people, but she is most likely fine.

As someone who was very goth all through high school and has not murdered anyone yet....the only concerning thing here is the pictures of violent ways to kill people who upset her. And it's hard to say if that's over the top drama or if she is really harboring death fantasies. So, maybe have her talk to a therapist?

But all the other stuff is just totally typical "goth" stuff...or whatever they call it now. My son calls it "edgy?" LOL. So cringe!

I was completely obsessed Anne Rice and wanted to be a vampire, and wrote dark, brooding poetry, and always preferred the strong, clever villains to the stupid heroines! Maleficent was soooo much cooler than Sleeping Beauty! The math problem stuff sounds like Edward Gorey or Roald Dahl.

My kid had a child like this in their class. It was all fine (if odd) until this child started threatening to kill my child in class group chats. I have no idea how "real" that was, but the fact that they singled out my kid in particular was unnerving, and DC no longer felt safe at school. There were clearly other things going on with the other child. And the school was not as helpful as they could have been. Fortunately they both graduated from that school and have much less to do with each other now.

I would urge you take at least the "stabby justice" part seriously and consult with a therapist.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:…, and loves to take the side of the bad guys when we watch movies or of dictators when we watch the news. She has always said she finds humans terribly unappealing and prefers animals instead…

….When someone annoys her, she employs picturesque depictions of violent ends they will come to, involving stabby things….

The horror part is scary, but leaving that aside, she seems very justice oriented. Her idea of justice might not be yours, nor mainstream, nor correct, but it’s her apparent motivation.

I teach 11 YOs and have two kids of my own. I’d run this second part past the school counselor, OP, whether they were my students or my own kids. Dark poetry and scary, intense stories are normal for this age, yes, but it sounds like you’re describing something different. It sounds like these “picturesque depictions of violent ends they will come to” are about people she actually knows. The fact that you added that these scenarios involve “stabby things” is more concerning.

Talk to the school counselor. They hopefully know your kid, and are trained to deal with this sort of thing.

+1 The school counselor and her pediatrician.

I’d tread very carefully here, OP. If you make a way bigger deal out of this than necessary, you’re potentially going to make her feel confused and ashamed about what she considers a perfectly fine creative outlet. And as she gets to be around 12/13, this could cause some major trust issues between the two of you.

She’s imaging, “employ[ing] picturesque depictions of violent ends… involving stabby things,” for those who annoy her. While
Some of what OP said can be downplayed, this cannot. Liking goth or gore is one thing. Imagining violence on others who simply annoy you is alarming.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:…, and loves to take the side of the bad guys when we watch movies or of dictators when we watch the news. She has always said she finds humans terribly unappealing and prefers animals instead…

….When someone annoys her, she employs picturesque depictions of violent ends they will come to, involving stabby things….

The horror part is scary, but leaving that aside, she seems very justice oriented. Her idea of justice might not be yours, nor mainstream, nor correct, but it’s her apparent motivation.

I teach 11 YOs and have two kids of my own. I’d run this second part past the school counselor, OP, whether they were my students or my own kids. Dark poetry and scary, intense stories are normal for this age, yes, but it sounds like you’re describing something different. It sounds like these “picturesque depictions of violent ends they will come to” are about people she actually knows. The fact that you added that these scenarios involve “stabby things” is more concerning.

Talk to the school counselor. They hopefully know your kid, and are trained to deal with this sort of thing.

+1 The school counselor and her pediatrician.

I’d tread very carefully here, OP. If you make a way bigger deal out of this than necessary, you’re potentially going to make her feel confused and ashamed about what she considers a perfectly fine creative outlet. And as she gets to be around 12/13, this could cause some major trust issues between the two of you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:…, and loves to take the side of the bad guys when we watch movies or of dictators when we watch the news. She has always said she finds humans terribly unappealing and prefers animals instead…

….When someone annoys her, she employs picturesque depictions of violent ends they will come to, involving stabby things….

The horror part is scary, but leaving that aside, she seems very justice oriented. Her idea of justice might not be yours, nor mainstream, nor correct, but it’s her apparent motivation.

I teach 11 YOs and have two kids of my own. I’d run this second part past the school counselor, OP, whether they were my students or my own kids. Dark poetry and scary, intense stories are normal for this age, yes, but it sounds like you’re describing something different. It sounds like these “picturesque depictions of violent ends they will come to” are about people she actually knows. The fact that you added that these scenarios involve “stabby things” is more concerning.

Talk to the school counselor. They hopefully know your kid, and are trained to deal with this sort of thing.

+1 The school counselor and her pediatrician.

Anonymous wrote:My DD was similar at that age. She did a report in 4th grade on the Donner Party and in 5th on the Salem witch trials. She was also really into the Horrible History books. Now, as a teen, she’s a little bit goth, but otherwise pretty normal. Don’t overthink this, OP.

Your kid was interested in some harsher aspects of history. Totally normal. Horrible Histories is extremely popular. Completely different from
“employ[ing] picturesque depictions of violent ends… involving stabby things,” for those who annoy her.

I hope this isn’t a real post. It immediately brought the Slenderman attack by the 12 year olds in Wisconsin to mind.