Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are so many posters responding that they have no regrets? The question is does anyone HAVE regrets. Posters responding that they don't are off topic and not helpful.

Because we are sick of hearing the narrative that people who divorce regret it. And the question was if anyone regrets it. The natural answer is “no” if you don’t. The OP did not say “I only want to hear from people who do regret and and tell me why.”

If you don't have some regret, then you're a sociopath.

NP. I didn't have kids. He was abusive, in part because he stopped treating his mental illness. I kept trying for a few years after it became so bad I moved out to my own apartment. My health and life were at risk. After I left his life for good, he pulled himself together -- finally! -- and went back into treatment. He's doing great now. I'm doing great.

What about divorcing him am I supposed to regret?

Anonymous wrote:People never admit to this. The human mind rationalizes and defends its choices. It's natural.

Agree. Especially on this forum people are all 100% "happier" since their divorce. My best friend's parents divorced when she was in college. UMC SAHM/disinterested breadwinner dad type situation. The mom initiated the divorce and later told us that she regretted it. It didn't make her any happier and she just had way less money.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t regret leaving him but I do (deeply) regret the impact it had on my kids. It scarred them and I see the it affecting their relationships with others and with me. In retrospect I was way too shallow in thinking about the impact on them as I so desperately wanted to get away from my ex.

I’m worried about this. I am so unbelievably miserable and my husband is verbally abusive. I need to leave, but the financial hit to the kids is what worries me the most. We can survive. But it will be a much more modest lifestyle. I can handle that for myself. We won’t be poor. But I do worry about the kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are so many posters responding that they have no regrets? The question is does anyone HAVE regrets. Posters responding that they don't are off topic and not helpful.

Because we are sick of hearing the narrative that people who divorce regret it. And the question was if anyone regrets it. The natural answer is “no” if you don’t. The OP did not say “I only want to hear from people who do regret and and tell me why.”

If you don't have some regret, then you're a sociopath.

I don’t regret leaving him but I do (deeply) regret the impact it had on my kids. It scarred them and I see the it affecting their relationships with others and with me. In retrospect I was way too shallow in thinking about the impact on them as I so desperately wanted to get away from my ex.

OP here. To clarify, I’m hoping to only here from people with regrets. Thanks.

My ex-h obviously does. He left for another woman a few years ago, we divorced and he recently told me he loves me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are so many posters responding that they have no regrets? The question is does anyone HAVE regrets. Posters responding that they don't are off topic and not helpful.

Because we are sick of hearing the narrative that people who divorce regret it. And the question was if anyone regrets it. The natural answer is “no” if you don’t. The OP did not say “I only want to hear from people who do regret and and tell me why.”

No, the OP said "anyone regret divorcing?" followed with "how come?" She didn't say "if not, why not?"

Anonymous wrote:I do. I regret following DCUM advice.

What was your situation?

Anonymous wrote:I do. I regret following DCUM advice.

Why in the world did you follow stranger’s advice?

Anonymous wrote:Why are so many posters responding that they have no regrets? The question is does anyone HAVE regrets. Posters responding that they don't are off topic and not helpful.

Because we are sick of hearing the narrative that people who divorce regret it. And the question was if anyone regrets it. The natural answer is “no” if you don’t. The OP did not say “I only want to hear from people who do regret and and tell me why.”

Our marriage is effectively over and we're both miserable. But we've got a child with autism and not a lot of money between us. Neither of us would be able to get by with the kid on our own. As bad as it is, it would be worse if we divorced.

Why are so many posters responding that they have no regrets? The question is does anyone HAVE regrets. Posters responding that they don't are off topic and not helpful.

No, I have zero regrets.

My second husband was the best.

I am now a recent widow.

Guessing men experience regret more than women.