Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is your family ghetto? If you’re white, that’s racist.

No it’s not.

Racist or not, it’s a distasteful adjective that should be excised from the vocabulary of anyone aspiring to sensitivity and/or refinement.

OP here. My cousin married her sisters rapist. That’s ghetto.

No, it's horrendous, selfish, appalling, ghastly, hurtful, disgusting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is your family ghetto? If you’re white, that’s racist.

No it’s not.

Racist or not, it’s a distasteful adjective that should be excised from the vocabulary of anyone aspiring to sensitivity and/or refinement.

OP here. My cousin married her sisters rapist. That’s ghetto.

What? That is crazy.

Anonymous wrote:what about 60-80 people? Both your stepdad and bio dad could walk you down the aisle together. Or courthouse ceremony with a big party a few months later?

OP here. I don’t want my bio dad to walk me down the aisle. He was never really in my life and honestly has no manners. He acts like a child. My stepdad has been there for me my whole life. I know I will get backlash from some family members if I exclude my dad from the wedding. He will not come if he doesn’t walk me down the aisle.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is your family ghetto? If you’re white, that’s racist.

No it’s not.

Racist or not, it’s a distasteful adjective that should be excised from the vocabulary of anyone aspiring to sensitivity and/or refinement.

OP here. My cousin married her sisters rapist. That’s ghetto.

Whatever you do, don’t invite the rapist.

Best not to use the word ghetto since some find it offensive. It distracts away from the convo, as this thread shows.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is his family drama/ghetto or is yours?

OP here. It’s mine. His family is fine. There’s also who is going to walk me down the aisle - my stepdad or my bio dad. It’s hard to decide any of this stuff.

How old are you? Go down the aisle with your fiance if you've been living together. It's not 1953.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is your family ghetto? If you’re white, that’s racist.

No it’s not.

Racist or not, it’s a distasteful adjective that should be excised from the vocabulary of anyone aspiring to sensitivity and/or refinement.

OP here. I don’t care about being sensitive.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is your family ghetto? If you’re white, that’s racist.

No it’s not.

Racist or not, it’s a distasteful adjective that should be excised from the vocabulary of anyone aspiring to sensitivity and/or refinement.

OP here. My cousin married her sisters rapist. That’s ghetto.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is his family drama/ghetto or is yours?

OP here. It’s mine. His family is fine. There’s also who is going to walk me down the aisle - my stepdad or my bio dad. It’s hard to decide any of this stuff.

Both dads and don’t invite extended family on your side, just his.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is your family ghetto? If you’re white, that’s racist.

No it’s not.

Racist or not, it’s a distasteful adjective that should be excised from the vocabulary of anyone aspiring to sensitivity and/or refinement.

what about 60-80 people? Both your stepdad and bio dad could walk you down the aisle together. Or courthouse ceremony with a big party a few months later?

Could he invite his extended family and you just invite the people in your family you want to at night? I don’t see anything wrong with that. I get how it will be easier for you to explain to extended family if he also does not invite extended family, but if he really really wants his extended family there, and you don’t want yours, you could just have different invite rules for both sides

In my situation, he insisted on a big wedding. I did not want a big wedding. I wanted 50-60 people TOPS. He wanted 120.

We argued about it and I finally said that he could pay for who he wanted to invite and I would pay for who I wanted to invite.

It ended up being about 110 people and only 20 of them were on my side. I really hated it. It felt like a performance and it was not a fun day for me. (Divorced 10 years later.)

I would look to see if there is a compromise. Is there any way to cut down on some of the drama/stress from your side of the family other than eloping?Would a wedding planner help to make things run more smoothly and take some of the items off your plate? Would a lunchtime reception keep things more in check.

Anonymous wrote:Why is your family ghetto? If you’re white, that’s racist.

No it’s not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is his family drama/ghetto or is yours?

OP here. It’s mine. His family is fine. There’s also who is going to walk me down the aisle - my stepdad or my bio dad. It’s hard to decide any of this stuff.

I had both a tiny ceremony and a wedding with family/friends. No one walked me down the aisle in either. Actually, that’s not entirely true, my husband and I entered together and walked together down the aisle in the larger wedding (40people).